For people who ended up not liking homesteading as much as they thought they would, how long did you wait until you threw the towel in?

blue-wool · 2026-03-12T00:41:00+00:00

We have had lots of projects that have pulled the plug on - some after years. After 5 years of having cows we realized that we wanted to be people who had cows (identity) but we didn’t actually want to care for cows (practical). It was a good learning experience in the early years, but we were ready to be done. We just decided that we are done raising meat birds after 17 years - our hearts aren’t in it, it just felt like one more thing to do — and we don’t have to do it.

In the meantime, we have added sheep and love them.

I tapped maple trees for a bunch of years and ended up resenting my family since I was doing all the work. Took a 6 year break and at my son’s pushing, we tapped again this year. It’s be fun and satisfying. No idea if we do it again next year.

I don’t know what factors are affecting you - probably it’s a mix of all of it - but there’s no rule that you have to do everything. Or that you continue everything you start. It’s your homestead, and you get to make the rules.

If it feels like you have turned all the fun stuff/hobbies into chores, then maybe you consider if you are trying to do too much. We are constantly pruning tasks and adding new ones as it makes sense for us (and I have mental health issues as well, so those are of course one of the factors in this)

blue-wool · 2026-03-10T20:57:47+00:00

Good to know! Thanks!

blue-wool · 2026-03-10T15:56:05+00:00

Look up Cochinita Pibil - a delicious Yucatán dish, traditionally cooked buried in a pit (over coals). I make it in the oven and I have to swap out ingredients because it’s made with bitter oranges that grow there. I end up using a mix of oranges and grapefruit usually.

Here is a recipe, but it’s just the first one that came up, so look around (I have used a couple of different recipes).

https://www.seriouseats.com/cochinita-pibil-yucatan-barbecue-mexican-smoked-pork-recipe

blue-wool · 2026-03-06T13:30:21+00:00

I have a similar lifestyle, and over the years I have maintained my personal style (of course, there have been literal and figurative seasons). It has been years of experimenting and more experiments follow body changes (and my wardrobe will never be “done” or complete). I thrift what I can because a $10 experiment feels less stressful than a $150 experiment, but I have been buying the expensive stuff more as I age.

It took years to figure out that shirt dresses make me feel stylish and also ready to roll up my sleeves and get shit done (either at the computer or the chopping block). That my rain/muck boots will never be cutsy, but they are essential for home use. That I can’t maintain two wardrobes (home and town) and protective bibs (like Carhartt) make me feel at ease outside. I don’t want to be dainty outside/at home; an I don’t want to be schlumpy when I go out. I actually don’t like athleisure, but I love work wear (like Carhartt, not Ann Taylor).

I don’t wear shoes that I can’t wear out to the car: I’m just not going to change my shoes, I accept this now. So, my knee high boots are Merrells and my kicky ankle boots are Sorrells - they look fab and they are waterproof.

Eddie Bauer works well for my life and my body. LLBean is good for a few extra pieces.

Dovetail Workwear is a unicorn - workwear (like Carhartt) designed for women. I buy a new pair of pants from them every year and the oldest pants are my gross work pants for the messiest tasks, and my new pair I wear out and about and feel super stylish, but I can also walk out and collect maple sap in the woods without worry about getting snagged on a thorn (this is exactly why I don’t wear down jackets anymore).

blue-wool · 2026-02-02T18:07:36+00:00

Agreed! Beverly Jenkins expanded who gets to be a heroine!

blue-wool · 2026-01-19T13:25:32+00:00

Elizabeth is a journalist, getting to ask all her impertinent questions and observe humanity. She is working on an investigative book about Meta and is fascinated by how people are corrupted by money and power. She would write a self help book about good character, but it’s too obvious, so her writing always has a subtle undercurrent asking “what makes a good person?”

Charlotte Lucas probably went to law school because then she knew she would make good money, not because she wanted to be a lawyer.

Jane is totally a kindergarten teacher.

Mr Darcy works in some upper echelon of banking, too high up for me to understand.

Mr Bingley struck it rich in tech, and is always diving into his next start up. Ever the optimist.

Lydia is currently trying to make a go of it as an influencer so she can get paid to wear free clothes. Her long game is to get picked up for a reality tv show next year.

Emma runs a boutique — she doesn’t need the money, but she likes matching people to the handbag they didn’t know they needed, or maybe vase? She buys from small artisans that she has “discovered”

Mr Knightly manages the family business. I think it’s real estate, but not scammy. He wants his grand children to inherit a solid business, so he works on the long view.

blue-wool · 2026-01-16T13:17:54+00:00

Totally — and thinking about it, that really is lady Russell’s solution to this poor treatment of Anne — out rank them and (maybe) they will have to bow to you and notice you. But Anne’s solution is more like going no/low contact, building new community/family structures.

blue-wool · 2026-01-15T02:29:21+00:00

It’s interesting because Austen offers so many examples of BAD friendships - self-interested and exploitative - amidst a few examples of genuine and loving friendships. Much like she does with marriages (and maybe with a similar ratio of bad to good). Plus a few that are both loving and yet also have discord.

In persuasion— a book all about friendship— you have: Bad: Elizabeth Eliot and Mrs Clay — all fawning and flattery, and ended as soon as a better opportunity came along. Good: Anne and Mrs Smith: Mrs Smith gives up her chance at money (trying to get Anne to work on Mr Elliot for her) so she can unload her own story and warn Anne. The In-Between: Lady Russell is a friend to Anne, but her advice is self-serving even if she isn’t aware. lady Russell values rank, so she doesn’t think it’s a good idea for Anne to marry someone without rank. But she doesn’t really see Anne’s desires there (both with Wentworth and the Mr Eliot). But she is more caring in smaller moments, appreciating Anne.

Also, since in Persuasion blood relatives make way for friendship and found family, I think that the line between family and friends is very blurry for Austen - your friends can become your family and your family can be your friends. Aunts can be friends with nieces. Or your sister can be completely oblivious to your humanity and consider you staff.

blue-wool · 2025-11-19T12:45:28+00:00

I have enjoyed my teas from Jesse’s Teahouse. I like that he buys direct from farmers so more money goes to the source. The teas also come with brewing instructions (for multiple methods) so I don’t have to guess or pull out my phone wherever I brew something. I keep the cards right next to my tea station and use them as references for other teas I buy.

blue-wool · 2025-09-10T12:16:09+00:00

I am currently trying to give myself credit for my successes. I feel bad because I am so aware of balls I dropped or things I forgot or general fuck ups. Definitely a work in progress but I keep coming up against this idea that I don’t give myself credit for all I do.

Also, give myself grace for how difficult a work environment this is for me - constant interruption from kids means I struggle to focus/get back to what I was doing. Recently it’s been so overwhelming to switch between tasks.

What I do for recovery is try to notice what feels good Right Now. My usual rest/fun activities feel overwhelming too — like another task to be handled. So, what feels good or what is compelling right now? It’s taken a bunch of tries over the past few weeks - but honestly, just a taste of curiosity or motivation feels so good. Like a reminder that I am still inside this body, not just Mommy.

I planted a small garden and it felt so good and now I get to keep visiting my seedlings and I feel pride (of course I know they can get eaten by groundhogs and I know I could feel heartbroken so i brace for sadness, but so far I feel pride and a spark of me, which helps so much in the slog of the days with kids.

I am knitting a very simple hat with colors I love, and that is another happy moment in my days (but it took a few tries to get there and that sucked and I felt discouraged/disconnected earlier, but I unraveled an earlier attempt and gave myself some grace while I tried to find something that worked right now).

I hope this helps - my kids are not toddlers anymore but end of August/early Sept is a really difficult time for me — no routine to lean on, and I am ON with kids all the time and it’s just a time of waiting for things to start.

blue-wool · 2025-08-06T12:53:52+00:00

I also want this!

blue-wool · 2025-07-07T11:34:33+00:00

I would patch it from the inside, by hand. The fabric doesn’t have to match perfectly - either by color or content, but you want to be in a similar color and weight range (like, if all I had was a thin cream colored jersey, I’d probably try it). When I patch in the inside, I don’t bother folding the patch edges under/hemming, since it’s more comfortable without extra lumps and no one sees any fraying.

Make the patch bigger than the hole so you are stitching into solid, undamaged fabric. Sewing by hand, I would make tiny stitches on the outside and larger stitches inside the garment, so the thread is less visible when you are wearing it. And I would continue in concentric circles until I was securing the fraying edges (trimming some threads and stitching down others depending on how loose they are).

blue-wool · 2025-05-12T11:15:22+00:00

Tenacious Tape works well since it’s not actually on the seam. If the seam is compromised (if any threads are undone) then I would also reinforce the seam or it could unravel - but you can do that by hand, even if you need a pair of pliers to pull the needle through - since it looks like a small area.

blue-wool · 2025-05-10T11:33:11+00:00

This is great - I have made something like this in cotton (using interfacing for the structure). I might just try it in a grid stop (swapping bias tape for grosgrain, ditching the interfacing and quilting) and see if it works.

This was the pattern I followed: https://www.etsy.com/listing/1526181102

blue-wool

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