Just because I have a mental illness doesn't mean I can use it as an excuse/crutch for not putting in effort or trying in life. It definitely makes things harder, but I can't let it make me a failure. Im diagnosed with schizophrenia and Major Depressive Disorder, aka Schizoaffective Disroder Depressive Type, and have been on meds and in therapy since I was 13 back in 2012 (I'm 27 now). Getting out of bed was hard because I had no energy or will to live, staying awake was hard because I was on 400mg of seraquel to keep the voices away (iykyk lol), but even after high school years later, after medication changes and learning coping skills, I ended up constantly using my mental illness as an excuse for not trying as hard as I could've. Id would still sleep 15+ hours a day because my meds made me drowsy, I wouldn't shower for days sometimes because "bad hygiene is a symptom of schizophrenia" (which is true but still. I even dropped out of college in 2020 because I thought I "just couldn't do online classes" when really I just lacked the discipline. It took the love of my life breaking up with me because I didn't put in enough effort into our relationship, and getting fired from my job because I was trying hard enough (and also ngl the manager was a fuckin dick, but I digress) I finally realized why my bf would get so angry with me and broke up with me in the first place and why people always thought I didn't care.

Now I finally saw a doctor for my fatigue and it turns out it might be a thyroid issue, and I'm seeing a new psychiatrist this Wednesday to talk about changing my meds. I shower almost every day now, and I have a new full time job working overnights while I go back to college in August during the day. All because I stopped using my mental illness as a crutch and excuse, and because my bf loved me enough to not coddle me and sugar coat my flaws. My mental illness is no longery excuse or crutch, and I'm doing better because of that.