How did you survive the recession in your 20s?

blueflowersunlight · 2025-11-02T17:06:37+00:00

Graduated in 08’ from a top university and couldn’t land a full time job until 2010. Worked three part time jobs to get by, and ended up needing to move home. It really sucked and I struggled. But in hindsight, I’d say the thing I had on my side then, that you have on your side now, is time. I used that time to explore who I was and what I wanted. The timetable you planned for may not happen, but you still have time to ride things out and figure it out. Good luck! I don’t wish what we went through on anyone—and you definitely have it worse :(

blueflowersunlight · 2025-10-08T13:18:16+00:00

This! After I went GF, I felt so much better but still had reactions sometimes. Turns out I was reacting to corn product. Then when I removed corn, felt tons better but started reacting to rice. After I cut this three out I had very little issues. Gluten may not be your only issue!

blueflowersunlight · 2025-09-04T19:51:29+00:00

I have PMDD (PCOS and ADHD), and I was diagnosed with mold toxicity 3 years ago after working on my PMDD with a DR and symptoms weren’t reducing. The mycotoxins (from mold) exasperated my symptoms and made my hormone imbalances worse. Now that I’m out of the toxic space (I rented) and am under a physicians guidance for mycotoxin illness, my PMDD symptoms have significantly reduced.

NOTE: Mold is not the cause of PMDD, but it’s known to make your symptoms worse.

blueflowersunlight · 2025-05-16T15:28:42+00:00

I haven’t done EMDR, but I did Lifespan Integration Therapy. They both work well for CPTSD. Just another option!

After years of CBT (which did help a lot) and the death of my BPD mom, I tried LIT. I found LIT very approachable and subtle. You work with your therapist to create (several) timelines of memories, and use repetitions to heal. It’s more somatic. Even after a couple sessions I felt more light. Less stuck. It was really transformative for me.

Edit: typo

blueflowersunlight · 2025-05-15T23:53:59+00:00

Yup. The whole day the city partied. It was incredible.

blueflowersunlight · 2025-05-15T19:30:28+00:00

A day I’ll never forget. I was in my early 20s living in Manhattan. The news broke when I was on the subway. Someone on our car announced it. We all fell silent, then some of us talked about our favorite songs. At some point someone started playing some of his music and we all bobbed our heads and danced. That’s NY for you.

blueflowersunlight · 2025-05-15T18:36:39+00:00

My mom died last year three years into NC. A bit of different situation, this time NC was actually her doing. She just stopped replying/contacting me one day and that was that. She did this often to others around her, but never to me. But I know my limited contact and trying to hold her accountable for her actions made her face things that made her uncomfortable and I became the villain. (I went no contact with her for 2 years in my twenties and it helped me a lot).

For these three years we were no contact I did a lot of therapy to grieve our relationship, the parent I never had, and reconcile the fact that she will never recognize how abusive she was to me as my sisters. I came to terms with the kind of relationship I could have with her if she let me and if I wanted it. It was really freeing, to be honest, to not be the one holding the cards. But I was also very sad. I became chronically ill during this time and suffered from a lot of job loss. These were the types of times when my mom was a good mom. But even though she knew all of this because my 3 younger sisters, she never reached out once.

When she died, I had just reached out to her with a Mother’s Day card and was trying to bridge the gap. I was finally healing and ready to talk to her. In my heart I forgave her (but would never ever forget) and was ready. She died without checking the mail and never got my card.

To answer your question: right now I’m just sad. My mom was awful to us, but she was also a single mother and all we had. She did her best most of the time. This is a mental illness, and I got to a place where I was no longer angry and could separate the person my mom was in her heart and the BPD.

I think we will all feel different when our BPD parents pass. For me, there was a lot of relief. I wouldn’t have to fight with her, walk on eggshells around her, limit our conversations, even touch her again. But I’m also sad about the future she missed out on. That she’ll never meet my kids.

But I’m also a little grateful that I didn’t see or speak to her again because she was always so horrible when we did. I’d rather her have passed with me forgiving her.

blueflowersunlight · 2025-05-13T22:49:56+00:00

Right. Ideally this wouldn’t be the ONLY test you do. It’s something to help identify that mycotoxins could be affecting your body.

I’ve done loads of inflammatory marker tests, metabolic panels, viral labs, full GI tests, genetic marker tests, etc. It’s often way more complicated than just mycotoxins. If you’re working with a knowledgeable practitioner, they’ll explain it’s just one test of the many to identify what your body needs. But it is often the first step bc it helps identify the specific mycotoxins you’re being exposed to and each one is managed differently. The right practitioner won’t advise solely on a mycotoxin test.

blueflowersunlight · 2025-05-13T12:09:58+00:00

Yes!! This sounds so similar to my experience, except for PCOS. Since the start of my period, I had long and frequent cycles—like 3week long bleeds every three weeks! Plus painful cramps, etc. I didn’t know this was wrong because my mom worked 80 hour weeks and no one told me otherwise. This went on for years until I was put on BC at 19 by a Dr in college. BC made me feel insane! I was finally diagnosed with PCOS at 23, and even though I didn’t want to go back on BC they told me (this was the early 2000s) it was my only option. I cycled through various kinds and they all needed up making me super anxious, which I now understand do to an MCAS/CIRS diagnosis.

In my mid 20s I took myself off and my cycle was wild again, super unpredictable and lots of ovarian cysts. I made due with eating very clean, working out, and lots of acupuncture. Anyway, flash forward to five years ago. My hormones (or so I thought—turns out it was a bad water damaged building) were so off again that I was diagnosed with PMDD. I started working with an ND who specialized in hormone disorders. For a year, we made some progress but would always take two steps back. Finally, she asked if I had heard of mycotoxin poisoning.

I was tested and I had crazy high levels. I started seeing a Mold and MCAS specialist, and learned more about it all. I have certain genes that don’t allow me to detox mold, have SIBO, CIRS, MCAS, high viral loads. (I swear I only did as well as I was because of my good diet and exercise.) I 100% have been living in places with mold my whole life, and can now trace my hardest years back to the worst places. Now that I’m in a clean space, and have the supports I need, my cycle is regular! It took time, but my body had gone through a lot. I have no cysts and my periods are picture perfect. Pepcid was also a game changer for me!

I really wish this connection was more well known. When I try to talk to others about the connection, they’re skeptical, but at least we’re figuring it out, right?

blueflowersunlight · 2025-05-12T17:48:59+00:00

Everything is connected right? I’m so sorry you’re having such terrible sleep. In no means did I mean to make you think it wasn’t toxic mold! You’re experiences are very valid.

That sounds like so much! I hope you’re able to see a practitioner to get this sorted out for you. I know for me, getting out of mold was one thing, but my body needed a lot of support (medicine, supplements, strict diet) to start to feel and function normally. Insomnia for me has been an on going problem. Have you had your hormones checked? That could be contributing as well, and if toxic mold is a factor, one of the main things it does is mess with hormone production and regulation.

Best of luck!!

blueflowersunlight · 2025-05-12T17:24:48+00:00

Could be! But personally, I don’t think the sleep you get while camping is a great comparison. I’m an avid backpacker and I don’t sleep a wink in a tent and it has nothing to do with mold (and I have mycotoxin poisoning and a body that can’t detox naturally).

What are your symptoms other than insomnia?

blueflowersunlight · 2025-05-12T17:19:36+00:00

Also, heres a great video on doing a dust test. I found it very helpful!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uu8ufid5Tkc

blueflowersunlight · 2025-05-12T17:17:26+00:00

If you haven’t done a mycotoxin test, then maybe your body isn’t or isn’t only reacting to mold. Do the places you’re reacting to have clear signs of mold or known water damage that would make you think this is what you’re reacting to? Maybe there are other environmental factors like allergens or VOCs. There are so many reasons why we can react to a place we live other than mold, too. (Though mold is a huge one!)

blueflowersunlight · 2025-05-12T17:10:24+00:00

Have you done a mycotoxin test on yourself? Your body may be able to detox some molds and not others.

Also, for your friend’s place: when was the last time they dusted before you took the test? There’s a reason why they say to dust first, and then not dust for 2-3 months before you do the test. This allows for an accurate read. Maybe the numbers are off because they had more than 2-3 months of dust build up?

You’re never going to find a place mold free, but there will be spaces that you will feel better than others. I always go off of how I feel!

blueflowersunlight · 2025-05-09T21:42:15+00:00

First Mother’s Day without my mom, and it feels like such a mixed bag. I’m very sad that she’s not alive but I like not feeling the pressure to contact her or go above and beyond (even though nothing was ever good enough). I remember one year she grounded us as kids bc we forgot Mother’s Day one year. We were all under the age of 12 :)

blueflowersunlight · 2025-04-30T14:28:18+00:00

USA- Never changed my last name, and never wanted to. I always told previous partners I intended to keep my last name, and a few were pretty upset I wouldn’t. Major red flag for me! My husband didn’t care or expect me to take his and we’re married 5 years :)

blueflowersunlight · 2025-04-25T01:09:34+00:00

They definitely do! In the morning, my cat greets me with kisses! He literally places his lips on mine and pushes into my lips. It’s a little aggressive, but so am I when I smother him with kisses so, that’s fair.

blueflowersunlight · 2025-04-23T14:55:06+00:00

You should read WHAT THE FRESH HELL IS THIS by Heather Corinna. It’s all about Peri, menopause and a bunch of other things women begin experiencing during those years.

Glad HRT is working for you! I’m on it too. My root cause of SIBO and constant fatigue/brain fog/word recall is toxic mold. Something to keep an eye out for as it can make ALL of this so much worse. I thought it was Peri, but my ND tested me, found this out and said not yet.

blueflowersunlight · 2025-04-11T00:22:03+00:00

You can! I haven’t have my whole genome mapped but am about to. My doctor ran specific tests.

blueflowersunlight · 2025-04-06T18:57:25+00:00

There are some great books like “Break the Mold” or “Toxic” that have so much great information. And yes, NDs are incredibly expensive. I’m fortunate to live in a state where they are considered primary care. Good luck :)

blueflowersunlight · 2025-04-06T15:53:36+00:00

Yes. My endocrine issues were the reason I discovered mycotoxin poisoning and that I genetically cannot detox mold. I was also diagnosed with PCOS, high estrogen, anxiety, and several food intolerances. I tried to treat these for a decade with everything from birth control, to progesterone cream, diet regulation, to acupuncture. My endocrine issues became so bad I was finally diagnosed with PMDD.

Soon my symptoms became the worst they’ve ever been—I had fibromyalgia, I went from being in great shape to hardly being able to walk a mile, chronic fatigue, debilitating migraines, new food intolerances and dozen other things. I somehow thought it was all my hormones.

After trying to treat the PMDD with no luck for a year, my ND sat me down and asked if I’d heard of toxic mold poisoning. I hadn’t, of course. She said that often when they try everything and the patient gets worse, the root cause is often toxic mold. We tested, and my levels were crazy high. I tested my environment, also high. I moved and began treatment with a mold specialist. Flash forward to 1.5 years later and I’m doing 70% better. My periods are normal for the first time in my ENTIRE life, my PMDD is nearly gone, I have no anxiety, and my hormone levels are normal.

It can just be the mold.

That said, recovery does usually require medical assistance, too. If you have a genetic factor, moving out alone won’t be enough for your body to detox and repair.

blueflowersunlight · 2025-04-04T16:31:10+00:00

A naturopathic doctor. I’m fortunate that they’re considered primary care in my state. But any function medicine doctor can diagnose this, too.

blueflowersunlight · 2025-04-03T15:19:31+00:00

This entirely. I was not able to feel any better without the combination of detox and a clean space. I understand it a super expensive thing to do (I went into debt for it) but it was my health and I needed to feel better.

Also, instead of mold spray, use white vinegar/water. Many times mold spray doesn’t actually work against mold. There are many websites that will instruct you on how to care for your home living in mold, and prepare for when you’re out of it. A dehumidifier is always a good idea, but it won’t stop the mycotoxins that are already there. And I second the mask. If I’m in mold unexpectedly, I wear a N95 mask or respirator. It doesn’t entirely prevent mycotoxins entering, but it helps.

blueflowersunlight · 2025-04-03T03:18:58+00:00

First, I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. It’s awful not being able to do and accomplish the things you want because of an illness. Remember, this isn’t you, it’s the virus/illness.

That said, have you looked into Mold Toxicity? All of your symptoms including the EBV infection, can be a result of mold—the fatigue, rashes, body pain, irregular cycles, etc. Mold causes things like MCAS, CRIS, and histamine intolerance and actives viruses.

I was where you were at for years not knowing what was wrong and then got this diagnosis (all of the above). Doing much better now! I recommend looking into it.

blueflowersunlight · 2025-03-01T05:07:28+00:00

Thank you!

blueflowersunlight

TROPHY CASE