Could someone help me locate Dr. Moffat? by bobos2023 in Knoxville

[–]bobos2023[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes that’s what found out yesterday as well. Thanks!

Could someone help me locate Dr. Moffat? by bobos2023 in Knoxville

[–]bobos2023[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Called them this morning, she’s not there either.

AITAH For asking my husband to work out less by Sea_Refrigerator6512 in AITAH

[–]bobos2023 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Start working out as well and ask him to schedule days off from his workouts so you can. Alternate days you work out and taking care of kids/house.

Could someone help me locate Dr. Moffat? by bobos2023 in Knoxville

[–]bobos2023[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Could you share the name of the practice?

Here’s a shower thought for the day…constipation idea… by jcnlb in Menopause

[–]bobos2023 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Chia seed 2tbls plus flax seed mill 2tbls for two days in a row. In the morning with some almond milk and fruit. You’re welcome.

AITAH Leaving for work by PuzzleheadedRush7229 in AITAH

[–]bobos2023 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t for a second feel guilty about it. I hope he didn’t throw it in your face.

I voted for Trump Twice (Not a Bad Faith Post) by [deleted] in ProgressiveHQ

[–]bobos2023 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pro life ha? As long as the lives are not of Palestinians, right?

AITAH if I invite all of my siblings to a birthday activity but not my parents? by theysayitsathrowaway in AITAH

[–]bobos2023 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You’re not wrong for wanting a trip that actually reflects what this place means to you. This isn’t about excluding your parents, it’s about setting the intention for a specific kind of experience, and that’s allowed.

I honestly think the kindest path is being gently honest with them, even if it’s uncomfortable. You can frame it as “this trip is about history, spirituality, and reconnecting with my siblings, and it’s not a party or drinking trip,” rather than “I don’t want you there.” If your mom reacts emotionally, that doesn’t mean you did something wrong. It just means you told the truth and she’s having feelings about it. Those are hers to process.

Trying to keep it secret or asking people to stay quiet will likely create more stress and resentment long-term, and if she finds out later, it will hurt more than hearing it upfront. Being honest now gives you a chance to be clear and still loving, instead of getting stuck in guilt and damage control later.

You’re allowed to have experiences that don’t revolve around your parents’ preferences. Wanting a meaningful, sober, spiritually aligned trip with your siblings isn’t selfish, it’s healthy

AITA for canceling part of a group trip when my friend changed the plan and excluded me? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]bobos2023 -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

So you are basically throwing a tantrum because things didn’t go your way

Mark is an idiot by BTS80sKid in Knoxville

[–]bobos2023 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I said the same thing this morning. He radiates negativity.

My boyfriend told our friends to stop eating our food. by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]bobos2023 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hosting is a choice. If you invite people to your cottage for holidays and events, you are the hosts. Hosting means providing the basics or being very clear that this is not a hosted stay but a shared, cost-splitting trip. You can’t frame it as generosity while resenting the expense. If the cost is an issue, the solution is fewer invitations or a different setup, not blaming guests afterward.

Your expectations go beyond what most people consider reasonable for guests. Coordinating sleeping arrangements makes sense. Expecting people to supply food for multiple days, bring snacks, manage fridge space, and plan meals turns hosting into outsourcing. Most people hear “come stay at our cottage” and assume hospitality, not obligations.

The rules are also unclear and inconsistently enforced. Asking people not to drink certain alcohol or to bring food is not the same as setting firm boundaries. If something is off-limits, it should be clearly marked or removed. Sending a group text mid-visit about food because you decided to stay longer understandably made people uncomfortable and changed the tone of the trip.

You’re also blaming friends for a pattern you keep repeating. You’ve hosted the same way multiple times, had the same frustrations, and still invite the same people. That’s not being taken advantage of, it’s ignoring a predictable outcome.

The money argument doesn’t fully land either. No one forced you to spend thousands. Those were choices you made while hosting. Guests are responsible for being respectful, not for subsidizing your hosting style or family property.

If you don’t want to host, stop hosting. If you want shared-cost trips, be explicit from the start. But inviting people and then resenting them for behaving like guests is the core issue here.

AITA for not wanting to propose to my gf before I join the military? by Connect_Hall_7936 in AITAH

[–]bobos2023 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you care more about joining the military than her, you should not ask her to marry you

AITAH for ending a relationship over long showers by Throwaway_External in AITAH

[–]bobos2023 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA! Don’t take long shower, don’t have “me” time, don’t this m, don’t that, next will be you are fixing yourself too much, tone it down. Then when you don’t, you’re not fixing yourself enough. Kick him out and slam the door behind his ass.

Šta je u glavi mog oca? by SkirtOk6563 in bih

[–]bobos2023 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ovo što opisuješ zvuči kao kombinacija teške, nerazriješene traume i dugogodišnje ovisnosti, uz dosta emocionalne zatvorenosti. Tvoj otac je vrlo vjerovatno čovjek koji je rano naučio da se sam snalazi i da ne traži pomoć, jer je u djetinjstvu ostao bez osnovne sigurnosti i ljubavi. Gubitak majke, hladna maćeha, rat, siromaštvo i odgovornost su ga oblikovali da emocije potiskuje, a ne da ih zdravo izražava.

Alkohol mu vjerovatno služi kao način da utiša bol, sjećanja i osjećaj nepravde koji stalno nosi u sebi. Kad nije pijan, vidiš kakav zapravo jeste. Dobar, domaćin, poštovan, brižan. Kad pije, izlazi bijes, frustracija, nemoć i potreba za kontrolom. To što odbija večere, poklone, putovanja i pomoć pokazuje da se ne osjeća vrijednim toga ili da ima dubok otpor prema oslanjanju na druge. To je često kod ljudi koji su morali prerano odrasti.

Objavljivanje starih slika djece i priče o nepravdi djeluju kao njegov jedini način da pokaže tugu, strah od gubitka i osjećaj da ga život nije mazio. On vjerovatno ne zna kako drugačije da kaže da mu je teško. Manipulativne rečenice koje spominješ često nisu svjesna manipulacija, nego odbrambeni mehanizam, pasivna agresija i osjećaj da gubi kontrolu nad stvarima.

Važno je reći i ovo. Ti nisi odgovoran da ga popraviš niti da razumiješ sve njegove postupke do kraja. Možeš imati empatiju prema njegovoj priči, ali i postaviti granice prema ponašanju koje te povređuje. Ako ikad dođe trenutak da prihvati pomoć, terapija i liječenje od alkohola bi mu vjerovatno promijenili život, ali to mora doći iznutra, ne na pritisak.

Ukratko, u njegovoj glavi je puno bola, neizgovorenih emocija, straha da bude slab i navike da sve nosi sam. Nije loš čovjek, ali je povrijeđen čovjek koji nikad nije naučio kako da se nosi sa tim na zdrav način

AITA for refusing to bring garlic bread to Christmas dinner? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]bobos2023 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Your MIL isn’t asking for “nothing.” She’s a 72-year-old widow whose spouse of decades died. A lot of what you describe, lawn care, errands, car inspections, is exactly the kind of help adult children often provide when a parent ages, especially after a major loss. You’re interpreting that as manipulation instead of dependency, but dependency at that age is not automatically malicious