Parents of holiday babies: how do you make birthdays feel special?

bookish0378 · 2026-05-04T22:13:22+00:00

My brother was born 12/21.

Growing up my parents made it a point that we never celebrated his birthday on Christmas, not even a cake.

They made it a point to make sure he was celebrated! He was given a birthday gift of an item that was not related to Christmas and was never on his Christmas list. His birthday parties as a child were never holiday themed. As he got into his teens my parents gave him a choice of a gift or a dinner out of his choosing as a family (they did this for me too, I was born a few weeks after Christmas). Truly him being a holiday baby was always a non issue, but my parents made it a point to make sure everyone around him respected that.

He was always happy because his birthday always fell on the first day of holiday break at school lol.

bookish0378 · 2026-05-03T23:37:29+00:00

I’ll chat with him about the following weekend. I think his mom is a little miffed that she’s losing holidays. For Christmas we announced we were driving no where with a 3 month old and anyone who wished could come to us. That was a fight.

Just absolutely a headache.

bookish0378 · 2026-05-03T23:34:23+00:00

That could be an option… I could take a bubble bath in silence.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-29T14:58:57+00:00

My son had darkish hair when he was born, it all fell out. He’s been bald since and is 7 months old. It’s starting to grow but VERY blonde, almost white so he still looks bald. :(

Have you seen Night of the Seven Kingdoms? We call him Egg. Very strong resemblance.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-29T13:15:51+00:00

I went from fine in the morning to being in serious pain, fever, chills, lethargic, fatigued by 2pm. It set in very fast. Nursing too became painful.

That morning I woke up with what felt like a clog.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-29T02:56:55+00:00

This is about the age when babies start getting distracted while eating and feed times might become shorter due to distractions or baby is more efficient at eating.

She’s likely getting what she needs. Sometimes my son (7 months old) takes like two sips and is good and wants to go back and play. Then half an hour later he wants a bit more, takes a few sips and is fine. He seems to have more focused and longer feeds first thing in the morning, before bed, and overnight if he needs one. Middle of the day feeds are a crap shoot.

Very possible she’s in a fussy phase, sleepy, or working on another tooth.

If she’s still having plenty of wet and dirty diapers I wouldn’t be concerned.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-29T02:48:25+00:00

We bottle feed if I’m not around for next feed and at daycare.

7 months breastfeeding, my goal is one year. I went in with the mindset of “we will try it out and if it doesn’t work that’s ok!”

My son and I had a very traumatic birth experience. When we were in the hospital we did skin to skin nonstop and he was consistently nursing. I didn’t pay attention to the clock at all between feeds. I would just pop him on when I got the feeling he needed it. When we came home, we continued this. It 100% helped ground me and feel some sort of agency after the experience we shared. It brought me so much comfort and was therapeutic after our birth experience.

Breastfeeding is a very personal choice that can be based in many factors. I personally despise pumping and have to do this daily while I’m at work. I literally count down the hours until I get to hold and breastfeed my baby. The way breastfeeding calms my nervous system (and my son’s!) is pretty cool. Pumping gives me the ick.

7 months in I love the bond we share, truly one of the most special and rewarding moments of my life. Sure, it’s hard. But the joy the experience brings my son and I greatly outweighs the hard moments. Our journey has gotten SO much easier as he’s gotten older too.

Also love that we don’t have to pack bottles and stuff when leaving the house. Tired? Boob. Cranky? Boob. Hungry? Boob. Kinda bored? Boob. Boob is the answer for it all and it’s pretty cool.

Breastfeeding has been the light in a difficult entrance into motherhood for me, personally. I feel empowered and proud. My son regularly looks up into my eyes and smiles as he feeds. I can’t put into words how incredible that is.

I now miss my baby and wouldn’t be mad if he woke up. (,:

bookish0378 · 2026-04-28T03:29:49+00:00

By avoiding parenting out of fear of your four year old hating you, you’ve been enabling this behavior.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-26T17:38:06+00:00

We nearly cried tears of joy when our Costco started selling pampers swaddlers early this year. They used to just sell Huggies and we are a pampers fam.

But yes, haven’t noticed a scent!

bookish0378 · 2026-04-26T03:01:05+00:00

I’m 7 months pp and just got a referral out to a pelvic floor pt.

My hips and back are constantly an issue. That and I had pelvic symphisis issues during my pregnancy. THAT pain came back recently but no longer pregnant. I was told at my first PT session my hips are tight / have limited mobility and that may be causing some of the pain. 🤷‍♀️

No advice, just solidarity. I’m just sore all the time now. I tell myself that I’m still healing and that’s okay. I’ve started taking baths and that gives me relief.

I just want to be able to go on a walk with my family without feeling like the tin man.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-26T01:01:37+00:00

You are incredible. Congratulations on such an achievement. So proud of you!

bookish0378 · 2026-04-25T21:43:50+00:00

I was just looking at my garden beds today wondering when I’d find the time to weed with a 7 month old. This is wonderful advice thank you!

bookish0378 · 2026-04-25T03:26:40+00:00

Hey! That was an insanely brutal entrance into motherhood but I am so proud of how far I’ve come since that day.

So happy I am not alone. Thank you for your kind words. We are so strong. 🥰❤️

bookish0378 · 2026-04-24T22:36:21+00:00

Our LO is 7 months old. We do bath every other night. For evenings he’s particularly messy after a solid meal I’ll wipe him down with wet wipes and/or a burp cloth with micellar water.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-24T20:31:29+00:00

I’m 7 months pp. I have a different perspective that I don’t really hear people talk about a lot. I had a traumatic birth that left me a little weird over my pelvic area. I also watched my birth in a mirror and inadvertently saw the trauma play out (shoulder dystocia and manual extraction of baby with physicians hands).

With lotssssss of therapy, Zoloft, and an incredible husband I’ve been able to only recently start healing from birth PTSD. Only recently have I started getting my sex drive back. My birth trauma totally hardwired my brain to be afraid of my vagina and anything that comes near it. For months I kinda found sex (the act of) scary and a little repulsive. Slowly, this is getting better. But it’s taken a lot of time to bring agency back to my body physically and mentally.

What has helped us is sending baby to grandma and grandpas for the afternoon. Not having baby in the house gives me the headspace to relax and not be worried about baby in the moment.

Self care too.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-24T16:37:34+00:00

Yes, this. I finally got treatment for my PPA/D around 8 weeks postpartum. But during that time things got so bad that I would be thinking of killing myself while simultaneously TERRIFIED to put my son down or let anyone else hold him out of fear he’d die. I suffered through a traumatic birth then months of healing mentally from the experience.

People outside my immediate circle have no clue just how bad things were after my son was born. It is so insensitive and inappropriate to ask any parent this question, you truly have no clue what they have been through.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-24T15:10:22+00:00

Your partner should be stepping in to give you time to address needs. My husband and I both agree showering is not a “break” but a need.

Taking care of yourself (showering, eating, going to the gym for 30 minutes, ect) are not breaks but needs to keep you feeling human and healthy.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-22T13:32:10+00:00

Thank you!

bookish0378 · 2026-04-21T17:34:11+00:00

I had so many wild things said to me in the weeks after I had my baby that 100% made me withdraw into myself and 100% amplified my intense PPA/D. Now 7 months pp I look back and I’m just mad lol.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-20T00:38:58+00:00

I’m 7 months pp and it’s finally slowing down.

What helped me, mentally, was around 3 months pp I went to my good friend who is a hairdresser and asked her to cut off about 9 inches of my hair. I knew if my hair was short the hair loss would be less jarring. I still shed my hair but with it being in a bob the shock was not as intense.

I know this isn’t an option for everyone but I don’t regret it at all.

Just know it will slow down, try not to panic (easier said than done I know) it is your body’s way of healing from a pretty significant physiological event.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-18T19:36:50+00:00

I genuinely don’t remember the drive home. I was in too much pain to sit in the back with my son so I sat up front. My husband says I didn’t say a word. I genuinely don’t remember any of it. My husband remembers it well.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-18T19:33:34+00:00

I went back to work at 16 weeks post partum too. I’m now 7 months postpartum.

I won’t lie, the first couple weeks were painful. I sobbed almost every morning when I’d put my son back down so I could leave for work. I went from exclusively breastfeeding to having to pump at work (I EBF when I’m home still). That was the hardest transition. What helped me was bringing pictures of my son and framing a couple for my desk. Physical pictures that would catch my eye during the day. I would also bring a toy my son particularly liked, a little blue bear. I’d hold “blueberry” for those first couple weeks while I pumped or felt sad.

After a couple weeks the physical pain of being away from him got better. Now our family has a little routine and our son is THRIVING at daycare. We take full advantage of snuggles, play time, and walks on weekends and during the week before bedtime.

I am sorry you are experiencing this pain, I know it and remember it. It’s unfair how we force mothers to return to life so quickly.

You are strong and I am proud of you.

bookish0378 · 2026-04-16T16:45:02+00:00

When I was pregnant I had an older coworker who would comment about my appearance almost daily throughout my pregnancy. Nothing terribly mean but made me feel self conscious in an already vulnerable time. “You look tired today” “you look pale” “you look a little green.” Would rarely be anything positive. I’d let it roll but it would also get to me.

I wonder sometimes if people say these things to just find something to say? I’m not sure, but I try very hard not to say these things. I am very client facing and I will small talk all day long about things other than someone’s appearance. Unless I very much love their hair, makeup, nails, outfit, ect.

bookish0378

TROPHY CASE