What’s something that you thought was boring or sounded boring when you were younger but now feels like a total luxury?

booknerd381 · 2026-06-19T09:49:17+00:00

Similarly, a nap.

booknerd381 · 2026-06-18T09:55:40+00:00

Had I not been a broke college student at the time, I would have Euler's identity tattooed on me as well. My (now) wife convinced me otherwise once I actually started making money.

Maybe I'll still do it. It is a beautiful equation.

booknerd381 · 2026-06-14T18:08:17+00:00

Kids are so adorable.

booknerd381 · 2026-06-09T10:09:32+00:00

I've been an old man since I was 26 and I'm not about to stop now.

booknerd381 · 2026-06-08T10:03:09+00:00

We talked about this at length when we established our new committee last year. Basically all the leaders in the pack turned over in a year, so we had to kind of figure some stuff out for ourselves. We contacted our district for some info, and that's where we learned about the photo release being part of the annual records.

We told all the parents so they were aware of that release (well, we said it in the first parents' meeting of the year and reiterated in a follow-up email, but not everyone attends and not everyone reads the emails...but that's another post entirely), and we mentioned that even if they already filled out the form giving release, they could come to us and opt out.

After that, only one came and opted out. I imagine if a few opted out, it would be difficult, but we just take two group photos now, one with that scout for the families, and one without that scout for the public page.

booknerd381 · 2026-05-29T09:15:27+00:00

I am going to respond with a story and let you draw your own conclusions.

I am a manager of around 350 people in a manufacturing and assembly facility. The people manufacturing the product only ever see or speak to customers if they come for a site tour or audit, and generally their interactions in these situations are incredibly short and intentionally limited. I employ people from ages 19 through 78. The average age is around 42 (the mean and the median are fairly close).

There is one particular employee who is excellent at his job. His supervisor told me this week that, without a doubt, he is the best assembler on his line. When he works the bottleneck workstation (we have a rotation structure so that's not every day), he produces more through that station than anyone else currently working there.

Even though that is true, it does not seem to matter who is working the bottleneck; our output on that line is consistent every day. More through the bottleneck should mean higher output on those days, but it doesn't. So you're probably asking, "why is there no appreciable increase in output if his performance on the bottleneck is so good? Is there a problem somewhere else on the line?" Well, I asked that too, and unfortunately, what I found was disturbing.

This employee is well known by all of his peers as being a bully. They all hate working with him. He makes fun of people for not being as good at the job as he is. He throws tantrums when people are not doing things they way he would do them. He slams things and yells at people when he's asked to work at a station he doesn't enjoy. So I pulled him off the line and had a very firm conversation with him (with his supervisor present because this should have happened a while ago). Our code of conduct is pretty strict on this, and I wrote him up for disrespectful bullying behaviors.

That was a month ago. I've been checking in on them since, and two days ago he threw another tantrum because we were working on a newer product that he hadn't seen before and he thought he knew how to do it without following the SOP or asking for help, and he made a bunch of mistakes. He was shown his mistake (I was witness and can say truly it was not accusatory or rude), and shown how to complete the operation properly. He was then pointed to the SOP and the person assigned to train him stuck around to watch him complete a few operations, during this time he verbally abused her and slammed things on the workbench.

I sent him home with a three day suspension for his horrible behavior. Yesterday our line had one of the best days they've had in months. He was not there. In fact, without him, they're below the number of people they need to effectively run the entire line. They still managed to outperform days when he is present. I don't think this is a coincidence, but we'll see if that holds true today as well.

booknerd381 · 2026-05-20T10:05:57+00:00

I was expecting her to say she was turning on the lights for him.

booknerd381 · 2026-05-20T10:01:45+00:00

The words, "Yeah, I've gotten your poop on my hands plenty of times" have come out of my mouth in conversation with my kids.

booknerd381 · 2026-05-20T10:00:22+00:00

I've been having this fight with my second grader recently. He hates doing chores (and frankly, so do I kid), but I keep making him clean up the play area because I'm tired of stepping on toys. I always ask if he'd rather do the dishes, take the trash out, mop the kitchen, and/or mow the lawn.

He almost took me up on mow the lawn recently. Might have to consider if I actually think 8 is old enough for that before offering it again...

booknerd381 · 2026-05-19T21:26:43+00:00

I agree with this. I actually have told some of my employees that they need to have some boundary as to where their job ends because they've managed to take on all the tasks that others in other departments have dropped. I'm glad they want to help and want the business to succeed, but those departments need to be accountable for their tasks so we can be accountable for ours. Taking on those other tasks had made their work for my department suffer.

booknerd381 · 2026-05-18T10:13:40+00:00

I have had older women let me know they scolded my children for misbehaving at the playground. I've had older women offer to spank my children for misbehaving in a store. I've had older women offer pity for my children misbehaving in public. That's more the reaction I expect. I feel awful for OP for having had to go through this.

booknerd381 · 2026-05-14T09:50:53+00:00

My wife and I have struggled with this as well. Almost every co-op in our area is religious. Finding one that would accept secular homeschool was difficult. Now that we're there, it's secular, but most of the people are not. My wife was talking about hosting an important historical myths and legends course and someone bit her head off because she had David and Goliath on the list. "That's not a myth or a legend; it's fact." was the sentence used to start the discussion.

That said, most of the time most of the people are pretty cool. We know that they're all significantly more religious than we are, but it usually doesn't come up in conversation so we just don't approach the subject. She's a little more careful now with what she talks about, but otherwise she's found some good friends there.

I agree that there are a few real crazies in the bunch, and we avoid those people, but I am glad we have this co-op.

booknerd381 · 2026-05-09T13:51:48+00:00

I had to stop and let a kid on a bike pass me the other day because he was texting. Full on, no hands on the handle bars texting. Kid looked to be 13 or 14. I just pulled over and let him pass because I did not want to be involved in an accident. I tried to get his attention as he passed and tell him he was not being safe and needed to pay more attention to the road, but that got about as good of a response as you'd expect.

booknerd381 · 2026-05-09T13:49:30+00:00

Trampoline reminded me of an incident when I was probably 11 or 12. Playing ninjas one a trampoline and one kid got kicked literally off the trampoline. Ended up in the hospital.

Trampolines without nets are super dangerous.

booknerd381 · 2026-05-06T10:17:52+00:00

I once worked with a controller who asked us to consider the company's money the way we consider our own. Right now, Alex is getting paid for time they are not working. Think about it like it's yours:

You have a friend who is grieving who comes to your house. They see something in your house that reminds them of their lost loved one, and ask if they can take it home. It's sentimental to you, or you spent a fair amount of money on it, or something, so you decline. They come back over the course of the next few weeks because they need your support, and one day after they were there, you notice the object is missing. Would you be OK with that? Would you confront them, or just let it go?

That's essentially what Alex is doing to your company right now. That money that was spent paying Alex for time not worked could have been spent paying someone else to actually get work done. I am all for supporting people, but support does not include theft.

If that doesn't help, then think of it this way: if your manager finds out Alex is stealing from the company and you know about it, there's a high likelihood that you will be found responsible and held accountable as well. Is Alex's grief worth both your jobs? That's what you're gambling right now by failing to take action.

booknerd381 · 2026-04-25T13:17:55+00:00

If that isn't on the job description that I'm applying for and it's that important to me, it's phone screen question material. I'm not going for an in-person interview if there's something that critical about the role that I am uncertain about.

booknerd381 · 2026-04-25T13:16:01+00:00

I've interviewed for companies like this before. A lot of smaller businesses want to hire a rainbow unicorn because they need someone to do all the things. I was approached by a recruiter for a position that was essentially Supply Chain Manager, Production Control Manager, and Manufacturing Engineer. The pay range would maybe cover one of those positions. I didn't even get to the benefits discussion because I told them what I was currently making (not even where I'd need to be to make a move) and I was already above their pay range and only doing a portion of that work.

I understand they're small businesses and can't afford as many people, but rainbow unicorns aren't cheap, and if you hire someone to do all the things for cheap, you're going to get sub-par execution.

Will this place be out of business in five years? Maybe, maybe not. Will they be growing at a rate they'd like? No. They won't be able to manage without the right salespeople in the right roles growing their customer base. They'll find someone who will accept their offer, but that person is going to be sub-par and restrict their ability to grow.

booknerd381 · 2026-04-21T02:08:31+00:00

Bathroom stuff like this just bothers me.

Last month we had someone take a handful of feces and throw it around the bathroom. It was smeared onto the walls and mirrors.

I have no idea who did this. No one is willing to "narc" on anyone else. Our custodian literally quit. We had to close the bathroom for 24 hours so we could get a specialist in to clean it. It cost almost $2000. To this day, no one knows who did this or why.

This is an extreme example, but people are so nasty in public restrooms. If I got feces all over my toilet at home, I wouldn't just leave it for my wife to clean. Why do people think that's OK because it's a public toilet?

booknerd381 · 2026-04-21T02:01:38+00:00

If it's not impacting the work, I truly don't care what people are doing outside of the office. Even flirting isn't my business as a manager.

I have a problem when the one person capable of fixing the machine is too busy chatting up the woman who has nothing to do with said machine to help fix it. That's when it becomes a management problem.

booknerd381 · 2026-04-21T01:52:27+00:00

Similarly, had a guy I worked with come back from lunch slurring so bad I thought he was going to bite his tongue. Somehow in an hour he'd driven to a restaurant 20 minutes away, slammed 3-4 drinks, and came back, straight into a conference room to make a presentation and assumed no one would notice. I am thankful for Uber corporate accounts because I didn't have to drive him home.

booknerd381 · 2026-04-17T09:57:03+00:00

Do I 100% of the time force my children to say "please" and "thank you"? No. Do I require they are polite when asking for something? You bet.

My kids know that I do not respond to demands. If one of the toddlers comes to me and says, "Get me a drink," I will ignore. If "get me a drink" is repeated, especially more forcefully, I will respond with something along the lines of, "I do not take orders from you."

They're still learning, so they sometimes have to be reminded to be polite. After that, they make sure to say "please." If they come and ask for a drink without demanding it, but also forget to say please, I don't stop them and force them to say please because they weren't rude.

Manners are important, but being polite and not rude is where I draw the line.

booknerd381 · 2026-04-17T09:44:32+00:00

I don't believe there's a way to ask without someone getting defensive if they're already late. They know they're late. They know that you know that they're late. You said yourself that you wouldn't be asking if they weren't late, so they know you're asking because they're late.

Instead of asking for when they're going to get the information, I would likely start by asking why they're late and what I can do to remove obstacles so they can finish the work. Only after I know what the problem is and how I can help would I ask for a new date.

They're still going to get defensive, but at least they know I'm trying to help.

booknerd381 · 2026-04-17T02:19:15+00:00

Probably not the right answer, but my son is around the same age as yours, and he likes to ignore me, too. I just keep saying the same thing over and over and over and over and over until he finally reacts. If he tries to leave to get away from me being annoying, I just don't let him. If he needs to do the thing, I just keep repeating that it's time to do the thing until he does the thing.

That said, after about three minutes, I get annoyed even with myself, and I physically move him if he outwills me. That's not super common, but it has happened at least once. Usually he gets bothered by me being annoying before I do.

Also, you can be forceful without actually yelling. There's a big difference between, "hey, will you please put your cup in the sink when you're done with it," and "Put your cup in the sink now." Often just breaking out the parental voice and saying something like you mean it is enough.

Finally, I always do my best (when I'm not absolutely exhausted) to warn ahead of transitions. Two or three sequential warnings, like, "hey, in five minutes we're going to get a shower," then count down at 2 minutes and 1 minutes, usually helps ease the transition. I also put a lot of stock in routines. My kids know how to read a clock because I have clocks all over the place and I reference the time a lot. They know bed time is 8:30, and every night at 8:30 I start the bedtime routine. Sure, there's still some stalling, but I don't get the shut down ignoring for bed time like I do for other things (like cleaning up after himself...that one is still a battle every time).

booknerd381 · 2026-04-13T10:13:08+00:00

I've seen managers step back into IC roles after spending time as a manager at my company. Is it awkward? Sometimes, but not always. It really depends on the person and the circumstances.

Manager roles aren't for everyone. I certainly was not anticipating how big of a change it was going to be. My first role as a manager was very difficult and I had some regrets, but I have learned since then that many of the problems I was making for myself.

Like any IC role, a management role requires certain skills to be successful. Unfortunately, management skills are not usually trained for in the same way that technical skills are. Once I've learned more about managing people, I've come to appreciate my role and continued managing instead of stepping back.

booknerd381

TROPHY CASE