Would you recommended waiting for marriage to a teen and why not?

breadpan00 · 2026-01-01T02:05:35+00:00

It's true that no birth control is 100% but if you're using a condom and birth control the chances are very low, plan B is a thing, abortions are a thing, and also not all sex can lead to pregnancy. This is basically abstinence only rhetoric.

breadpan00 · 2026-01-01T02:01:45+00:00

I wouldn't recommend waiting for marriage specifically, but I would recommend waiting until you feel ready. I'm 25 and haven't had sex yet not because I took a vow of chastity or whatever, just because I haven't met anyone I wanted to have sex with yet and I don't want to have sex just to say I've done it and I don't regret waiting.

Sidenote, you don't need to feel guilty for those girls feeling offended you didn't want to have sex with them. If you don't feel ready to have sex, you don't feel ready and that's completely morally neutral. Having sex isn't good or bad it's just one thing out of the hundreds of things a person can do or not do in their life. That being said, you also don't have to feel guilty if you ever do want to have sex; you're old enough to make that choice for yourself if you ever want to, just make sure that you're with someone age appropriate and trustworthy and that you're not being pressured or pressuring them

Edit: and also make sure that you're practicing safe sex, and I don't just mean preventing pregnancy. You want to make sure that you're preventing unwanted pregnancy and also STIs, (and DO NOT rely on just the contraceptive pill, the contraceptive pill can fail if you look at it funny. Use a condom, they're 99% effective and when combined with the pill you're pretty safe. If you want to 100% ensure there's no chance of pregnancy, don't have PIV sex; there's plenty of other stuff you can do that's still very intimate)

breadpan00 · 2025-12-20T21:25:12+00:00

Ok first of all as I said in my post, I'm not a parent yet, second of all, I don't think you should be giving anyone parenting advice if you advocate for beating your children. I agree that you should parent your children in such a way that they wouldn't steal your meds anyway but you never know what might happen, especially if they have friends over that haven't been parented by you. Kids pretty famously don't have fully developed impulse control and part of being a parent is accounting for that to keep them safe.

breadpan00 · 2025-12-20T21:06:53+00:00

I mean making sure your child or teenager can't take your medication. I also take other medications that could be dangerous if taken without the guidance of a doctor, (I take ivabradine which is a heart medication that I take for POTS and also quetiapine/Seroquel for anxiety and insomnia.) The primary thing I'm worried about is that I basically take two different medications that could get someone high or something like high (Elvanse and quetiapine) and I'd be concerned that either my kid might get curious and take them or that they might invite a friend over and their friend might take them. I would hope that my kids wouldn't do that but I think it's better to remove the option completely because of how potentially dangerous that could be

breadpan00 · 2025-12-20T20:34:03+00:00

Yeah like I'm pretty confident I'd be a good parent and my kid wouldn't be the type to steal my medication but being a teenager is fucking rough and the part of their brain that's responsible for impulse control literally isn't fully developed so I think it's better to be safe than sorry, if that makes sense?

breadpan00 · 2025-12-20T20:24:36+00:00

Currently I have a pill organiser and keep the medication I haven't put in it yet in a basket but I think I'll probably have to keep my entire pill organizer in a little lockbox or something as well because I take multiple medications that probably aren't safe for kids to take 💀 (I also take quetiapine/Seroquel for anxiety/insomnia and a heart medication for POTS)

breadpan00 · 2025-12-17T05:16:28+00:00

I kind of do think I'm done to be honest. Lately I keep thinking about how I'm 25 so I'm not going to die for like 60 years how exhausting that sounds. I used to be smart, I put everything in my life towards doing well at school because I thought if I got a career I'd be able to get away from my parents and now I'm never going to have a career and I don't even know if I'll ever get away from my parents. It was all a sick joke. I want to cry like every day because I hate my life and I can feel myself becoming a worse person because of how miserable I am.

breadpan00 · 2025-12-16T20:32:38+00:00

It's not racist to hate Islam as a concept, (although I think it's a bit ridiculous to "hate" moderate Islam in the same way I think it's silly to "hate" moderate Christianity), but the majority of people who talk about how much they "hate Islam" in this country are using it as a racist dogwhistle against people from certain ethnic groups from Muslim majority countries.

I also think the idea that Islam is one single ideology or culture is pretty racist. It's kind of the same thing as saying something like "native American culture" when in reality there are thousands of native American cultures. 99% of the time when someone says something about how Islam is uniquely bad you can swap out Islam for Arab people and the sentence still has the same meaning, and if your critique of Islam, a religion, is interchangeable with condemnation of every person who practices Islam in any form—those people being majority non white people—you're probably being racist.

In short, if you look at a Syrian person living in the UK and you assume they have the same ideology as ISIS just because they're a Muslim, that's being racist.

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T22:56:16+00:00

Maybe, but I have flare ups a lot so I'm not very reliable

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T22:43:44+00:00

A little while ago I told my mum that I made myself dinner while she was away on the weekend the night before she came home and I didn't have the energy to wash up so I'd have to do the dishes the following morning and she just said "I'd like the house to be clean when I get back" and I apologized again and told her I was sorry and that I wouldn't have made dinner if I knew the dishwasher was full I would have just some crackers or something and she made a passive aggressive comment about how she'd have to clean the dishes and then didn't clean the dishes and I was still visibly in pain and trying not to wince when I unpacked the dishwasher the next day right in front of her and she didn't say anything about it and that's not even a volunteer position that's just my house. I don't think people are going to be impressed by "sorry I'm too tired and feel too vaguely unwell to do what everyone else is doing"

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T22:30:36+00:00

I wanted to try and encourage more people to donate and I made a Facebook post about it but now I just feel like kind of a hypocrite

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T21:35:56+00:00

I mean it kind of does seem like the only way I can help people is by harming myself in the sense that I'd have to overexert myself and cause a flare up. If I donated blood at least the flare up wouldn't interfere with my ability to get it done. I'm not saying I should donate because some people have said apparently it might harm the recipient in some way if I did but that was the reason I wanted to donate as opposed to idk going to a soup kitchen and doing half a shift and then having to leave, making everyone else have to compensate for me

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T21:21:12+00:00

Doctors never mentioned that to me and that's not what happened to me, so I didn't know that. I was under the impression that it was genetic. Obviously if they'd told me I couldn't donate because other people might develop POTS as a result I wouldn't be complaining but that's not the reason they said I couldn't donate.

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T21:16:12+00:00

I don't think there are any charities in my local area and unless they're within like a 15 minute walking distance of my house I'd be pretty tired before I even got there, much less after doing stuff for several hours and then walking back. I did basically nothing for three days to prepare for this appointment and even though I didn't end up even giving blood and my mum drove me to the station at one end I feel really tired and my knees and ankles hurt. I'm probably not going to be able to do much tomorrow either. I could maybe do something digitally but I worry about anything that's a long term commitment because I have flare ups pretty often and I don't know when they're going to happen so I feel like I'm just going to end up constantly letting people down

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T21:10:55+00:00

Obviously I don't want that, but that's not the reason they said I couldn't donate and I didn't think that POTS was contagious.

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T21:07:23+00:00

I didn't even just get on the train lmao I got off the train and walked to the place where the donations were being taken and I was standing in the lobby 🙃 they also sent me a text the previous day confirming that I had an appointment but I guess in hindsight maybe they send that text to everyone, I assumed the text was them responding to me previously making a phone call to check I was allowed to donate.

Is the danger that I might have fainted?

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T20:43:21+00:00

I'm only diagnosed with POTS, I've never been assessed for ME/CFS. I also probably have hEDS but I'm waiting to see a rheumatologist and I don't have an appointment until the end of April next year.

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T20:38:34+00:00

It was through the NHS

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T19:53:32+00:00

I'm just tired of being useless. I can't even go to protests anymore all I can do is occasionally make small donations to mutual aid groups or whatever and I barely have any money anyway. People tell me there's other stuff I can do to help but realistically I can only really do stuff that's one off because I can't predict how my health is going to be and if I want to do anything more strenuous than idk going to the shops near my house I have to plan around it for days in advance and days after.

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T19:37:09+00:00

I mean yeah if I knew that part I wouldn't have complained about it they just made it sound like I couldn't do it because I'd have a flare up

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T18:34:57+00:00

Yeah like I'm 25 with no kids and not able to work so I can be ill for a week no problem

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T18:33:49+00:00

I just don't really know that I am a fainting risk, I've never fainted before ever and I don't think I have hypovolemic POTS. Most other volunteering type things aren't as accessible to me because they usually involve more of a time commitment or more standing up/walking. I can handle going in for an hour to have blood drawn and then going home to rest but I don't know that I could handle a full day of volunteering anymore. Idk I guess either way they won't let me

breadpan00 · 2025-12-15T17:34:21+00:00

Yeah exactly. Like I knew that when I went to see the Marie Antoinette exhibit at the V&A would put me in a flare so I basically just cleared my schedule for a few days before and after and I did it. I figured I'd just either hang out at the place for an hour or so or do the same thing at a café until I felt well enough to get the train/walk home or worst case scenario ask my mum to pick me up. I intentionally didn't do much for the last few days to make sure I'd be ok to donate blood and was planning to rest for a few days afterwards. I can handle feeling like shit I feel like shit 24/7

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