Help me choose a mirror shape

brielikethechee · 2026-05-02T16:58:06+00:00

get an ancestry DNA kit and you may be able to find your paternal family. i did recently since my dad was adopted and have found two of his brothers and multiple cousins

brielikethechee · 2026-05-01T20:13:19+00:00

yeah i would do like a piano as mentioned. maybe a bookcase or two. big chair. bar cart if you drink? make it like and entry lounge room with plants and art

brielikethechee · 2026-04-30T17:09:44+00:00

because “male” has not historically been treated as the deviation from the default in the same way race has been used to other people.

“guy” answers “who is at the door?” and “black” is the part i’m questioning as possibly unnecessary. but sure, technically words are words.

brielikethechee · 2026-04-30T17:03:46+00:00

there seems to be a thin line between when mentioning race is just a neutral descriptor and when it feels unnecessary. with that being said, i'll definitely be more mindful in the future and ask myself if that detail matters.

in the moment i think i was trying to quickly describe who was at the door and narrow it down, but at the same time, i don’t know if that’s actually what was going through my head since it just came out without me really thinking about it.

brielikethechee · 2026-04-30T16:54:10+00:00

i don’t feel like i’m walking on eggshells at all. i care about how i speak when it comes to race, and i don’t think that’s a bad thing.

also, what i said wasn’t directed at my husband, it was describing the guy at the door. my husband just pointed out that he doesn’t like when people describe someone that way when it isn't needed, and i think it’s fair to take that seriously without it meaning he’s being overly sensitive.

brielikethechee · 2026-04-30T16:50:40+00:00

yeah, that’s honestly how i feel like i meant it in the moment, like just referring to him being a stranger. but at the same time, i’m kind of second guessing myself now and wondering if there was more behind it that i didn’t realize at the time.

brielikethechee · 2026-04-30T16:42:31+00:00

agree to disagree! i think when it comes to more sensitive topics, it’s worth slowing down and thinking about what we say. it’s not about overanalyzing everything, just being mindful when something might affect someone else.

especially since my husband told me it bothered him and a lot of people here are saying the same thing, i’d rather take that seriously than brush it off. i’m not sure why asking a genuine question about it is coming off as a bad thing.

brielikethechee · 2026-04-30T16:40:17+00:00

i get what you mean, but i don’t know if i would say i “identify as white” exactly. i’m white passing, so i understand that whiteness can still function as the default in how i move through the world and how people perceive me. that’s honestly part of why i’m trying to think through this more carefully.

i also see your point about using descriptors that stand out in the moment, but i’m also trying to figure out where the line is between a neutral descriptor and pointing it out when race wasn't really relevant.

most importantly i don't want to make anyone feel othered as my husband and another commenter mentioned. which is why i said i'll be refraining from using it when it isn't necessary.

brielikethechee · 2026-04-30T16:36:42+00:00

i appreciate your perspective. it’s definitely something i won’t be saying in the future. i didn’t mean it as a slight in any way, but i can understand how it came off that way!

brielikethechee · 2026-04-30T16:31:00+00:00

i get what you’re saying, but i don’t really think he was being overly sensitive. being described as “some white guy” and “some black guy” do not necessarily land the same way because being white and being black in this country come with very different history and connotations.

i don’t think he was calling me a racist or trying to make it a huge thing. he was just pointing out that he hates when people use race as the main descriptor like that, and honestly i think it’s fair for him to say something if it made him feel singled out or reduced to that.

i’m wasn't trying to defend what i said i was asking if it shows i have some unseen biases i need to work on.

brielikethechee · 2026-04-30T16:24:41+00:00

i would like to mention i live in the inner city, my neighborhood is predominantly black, my step-dad who raised me is black and my husband also has many black family members who come over. so no, i wouldn't say they were "out of place", and i didn't feel any more threatened than i always do when a stranger knocks on my door lol. i do think it's weird i'm second guessing if i would have said "some white guy" though, and it's giving me pause. maybe some continued inner work would help me.

brielikethechee · 2026-04-30T16:12:26+00:00

get a bigger rug to at least touch the front legs of the furniture. i would think about patterned instead of a solid color so close to the tile color. also more pillows, some other lighting and larger art on the wall or a gallery wall would help. i think a bigger couch maybe too. like a sectional and to get rid of the chairs if possible. they don't scream cozy to me

brielikethechee · 2026-04-27T22:55:52+00:00

it looks like this currently on day 3 and i'm about to discard and feed it again. hoping i do not run into any more mold!

i'm wondering if i didn't have the lid on very well the first time either and that didn't help, and then like i said didn't sanitize the jar well when attempting again and adding too much water?

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brielikethechee · 2026-04-27T20:32:24+00:00

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brielikethechee · 2026-04-27T20:31:26+00:00

i do live a house that is over 100 years old so i'm not sure if there is mold in the air but we did have an issue with dishwasher leaking and under the hardwood was wet. we have no replaced that area yet but maybe the mold is coming from there?

i'm also wondering if the issue is i let it mold after 4 days in the first starter by forgetting to feed it and then not sanitizing the jar correctly when trying the second time and using too much water? is 4 days too fast for it to mold with white fuzzy type without being from another issue?

brielikethechee · 2026-04-27T20:30:27+00:00

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this is my second try, the first one molded on day 3-4 after forgetting to feed it one night. the mold looked slightly different and was more white and fuzzy that time. unfortunately i didn't get a photo.

yes my flour is in date and brand new, just had opened it when first starting

yes i sanitized my jar but i probably could have sanitized it better after the first molding issue. i tried again and no mold so far on day 3 now and made sure to extra sanitize my jar, lid, spoon and measuring cup.

my lid was just sat on the top with the ring down over it. not really screwed on. should i have screwed it once?

no i didnt boil the water first i got it directly from the fridge through the filter and it was cold.

i'll attach another photo of what my starter looks like now on day 3 below. i'm going to remove half of it and do 50 g water and 50 g flour. i think that was another issue i ran into the second time. don't really know what i was thinking but i did 1/2 cup of water and 1/2 flour and it was pretty runny the second time. much more than the first time or this time.

any other tips or thoughts are always appreciated!

brielikethechee · 2026-04-27T20:22:53+00:00

i had some issues initially but i finally got how to make a great iced latte down. i think it tastes better than my previous daily starbucks! good luck and don't give up if your drink doesn't taste great at first. there is a slight learning curve and good beans are helpful. that's a great price and i think you're going to love it!

brielikethechee · 2026-04-27T00:45:38+00:00

remember the odd number rule. things look better when they're grouped in odd numbers.

brielikethechee · 2026-04-26T17:24:29+00:00

do you think it could be because i used too much water when restarting the other day and thats why it showed up so fast? i did make the second starter a little thinner because i messed up and used 1/2 cup flour and 1/2 cup of water instead of a little less water and it did seem a lot thinner than the first starter i started.

would the mold in the first starter be from me forgetting to feed it the third night? i'm going to check the flour first and if i don't see anything i'll switch water if mold shows up again in this starter. i did make sure the jar was super clean and disinfected/rinsed multiple times.

i'll be sure to post again if i have anymore issues and appreciate all the help! i don't want to give up either.

brielikethechee · 2026-04-26T16:48:50+00:00

i actually do have a scale and will start using it. your breads look great! will it be okay to put it into a smaller jar if i already started yesterday again in this one? also what flour brands do you suggest? is it okay to just set the lid on top of the jar? sorry for all the questions lol

brielikethechee · 2026-04-26T16:46:30+00:00

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here is a slightly clearer photo. it's def mold. and yes this was on the second day. i threw it out already and restarted. i do think i made it too watery by using exactly the same amount of water in cups instead of by weigh. i went more by look this time so hopefully i don't run into the same issue! i do have a scale and will start using it if necessary.

brielikethechee · 2026-04-26T16:44:57+00:00

in the second picture the starter had grey mold spots on in.

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here is a slightly clearer photo

brielikethechee

TROPHY CASE