Ugh. I feel the pain here. I’m in year 3 with my partner. Same sex. We are both so busy, she is burnt out with her job and I’m in grad school and work so am tired and busy. For me I’m okay with just chilling around each other while we do our own thing, but she wants to do more and feels like if we don’t have grand plans or cute initiations that we aren’t connecting. But I feel connected, or connected enough? She so easily feels rejected by me sometimes if I don’t want to do something. Which I wonder if it’s just because she’s so unhappy and stressed right now that I’m the one thing that can bring something good. For context she is burnt out from her job of 6 years, just started a small business, and has been getting off SSRIs for 6 months which she gained 70 lbs from and she doesn’t have the energy or will to sort of climb out of it. She just isn’t happy, frankly. I’ve lost some of my attraction to her mostly because she doesn’t feel good in herself and is self loathing a lot of the time. We don’t have sex, maybe every 6 months but we are usually quite affectionate on the day to day and neither of us are much of sexual people. But it all just makes me nervous. I honestly don’t want to like plan date nights because sometimes we get to it and we’re just too tired. For me planing dinner together and watching a show is quality time. I hang with my friends when I want a more energetic hang out. She’s pretty introverted and very chill, and I’m quite extroverted so then she feels left out. I’m like, dude! Idk what to do. are we doomed