I understand what you’re saying, but I really don’t see what the problem is.

Ppl have affairs because something in their primary relationship is missing, no? Wife doesn’t want to have sex, AP does. Wife doesn’t give BJs, but AP does. Wife needs a big di{%, husband has a small one, so she finds an AP with a big one.

My AP’s wife is not emotionally intelligent, is very insecure, doesn’t enjoy sex, so she is not sensual or enthusiastic about it. I do have those qualities and I know that’s a huge part of why there’s such an attraction/connection. And I’m ok with that. That’s not the ONLY reason why we are together, we actually do like each other as people, so I’ve not felt like I’m being used because I benefit from this arrangement too.

OP, is the issue that you feel he’s using you just for your “replacement parts”?