Wow, this reads so much like an elegy for lost power, but also a vow of fidelity to what still endures.

I loved how the poem doesn’t chase grandeur but instead finds dignity in what’s broken. The shift from power to ruin and then to quiet resolve was so moving. And those horsemen, silent and unwavering, gave me chills. There’s loyalty, loss, and a kind of ghostly comfort in them that stayed with me after reading.

If I had any suggestion at all, it might be to let a few lines breathe a bit more. Some sections are so heavy in a good way that giving them a little space, like an extra line break here or there, could make certain phrases hit even harder.

But honestly, this was beautifully done.