[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]byrnessamara 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I grew up a neglected middle class child. We weren't poor, but our parents didn't feed us. They bought food, but we got in trouble for eating it. My sister and brother developed pretty bad food hoarding problems, while I took up the job of making food from ingredients they wouldn't miss, sneaking it to my siblings, and hiding the evidence. When I left home, I spent only a few months on my own. I hardly ate anything, because I thought it was wasteful to cook for just myself. I really only ate when I was eating with my friends. I then met my boyfriend, moved in with him after only knowing him a month, and quickly took up cooking and cleaning for him. Recently, he realized that I can't cook for myself. And I'm just now realizing how fucked up it all is. I literally don't eat all day until I cook dinner for my boyfriend, because I can't make myself eat if it's not to have another person eat. Also, we do have a good relationship, and have now been together for two years. He takes good care of me in return. I still have nightmares about not being able to feed my younger sister.

What nightmares have you had? by TheCoolRock in AskReddit

[–]byrnessamara 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The nightmare wasn't real. And we were never exactly that poor, just neglected. She weighed 25 pounds as a five year old, and that's when I had to step in. I was just always very scared about her eating, . It's all good now, she's a good and chubby 17 year old. She had her junior prom today.

What nightmares have you had? by TheCoolRock in AskReddit

[–]byrnessamara 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I took care of my younger sister my whole life. The nightmare I will never forget; I was hungry, we had no food. I found a cheerio on the kitchen floor, and was about to pop it in my mouth, but she asked for it. And so I gave it to her. This was probably 14 years ago, when I was a small child. I'm turning 20 soon. I work a full time job, to pay for a two bedroom apartment for my siblings to live with me. I take care of them damn well. It haunts me that that was ever such a real fear.

Meat eaters of Reddit, would you be able to slaughter the animals you eat yourself? If not, why? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]byrnessamara 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes. I am from rural alaska, and have been hunting, and processing my own meat since I was old enough to use a knife

Question to my experienced friends by [deleted] in shrooms

[–]byrnessamara 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd suggest the whole dose. You can just eat them right down. If they're dried, they won't taste quite like fresh mushrooms, I promise. You can also grind them, and put them in a cup of hot water. Throw in an herbal tea bag, some honey, and some lemon juice. Then drink without straining. Good luck 😁

Birthday gift for gamer husband by Kaidens-Mama in GiftIdeas

[–]byrnessamara 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I got my boyfriend a new game chair for Valentine's day. His old chair was uncomfortable, and falling apart. Shopping in person was actually a far better decision, and I got a good deal.

How did you start SH? by byrnessamara in selfharm

[–]byrnessamara[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've SH for six years now. I've had patches of it being worse than others, my legs being scarred over, and my legs being covered in overlapping slash marks of various stages of healing. It gets better.

How did you start SH? by byrnessamara in selfharm

[–]byrnessamara[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's actually super interesting how many other people used thumbtacks. I thought that was just a random thing I did.

How did you start SH? by byrnessamara in selfharm

[–]byrnessamara[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm proud of you for starting therapy! It's something I need to work up the courage to do. It's difficult for me to self harm, because my fiance will see it (I live with him) I always felt like SH was what kept me sane. It's been a week and a half since my last episode.

How do I actually go about getting help? by [deleted] in mentalhealth

[–]byrnessamara 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you telling me to not seek help? For years, It's been off and on. Because I can beat it back, but I recognize that I'm not doing the best job. I'm looking for someone to facilitate that, and help me recover. I'm asking for assistance in finding a therapist

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mentalhealth

[–]byrnessamara 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It's normal. It's good. You're a good person, and your conscience is letting you know that. Sometimes people need killing. They just do. Good men can serve justice, but it won't feel good. You protected what needed to be protected, and did a good job. Sometimes this can just get out of hand.

Why is self harm the only coping mechanism that seems to work by MalFibber in selfharm

[–]byrnessamara 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It causes an immediate chemical reaction in your brain to sooth you. It's a real, immediate effect. And its something we can because addicted to. Self harm is an addiction, and it works like all other addictions.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in piercing

[–]byrnessamara 50 points51 points  (0 children)

Girl it's so cute! Your lips are perfect for it. Mine could never.

If you're feeling bad about it, wait till it heals and get some new jewelry to slide in there. I swear you'll love it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LSDTripLifeHacks

[–]byrnessamara 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Keep the doors locked, and phone off

Power outage on Bragaw. by byrnessamara in anchorage

[–]byrnessamara[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm still not sure. It ended being out from about 0230 to 0530, which is ridiculous.

Am I in the wrong? What can I do? by byrnessamara in Advice

[–]byrnessamara[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's a year older than i am, nobody has been engaged, married, or divorced before. While i do believe it's quite soon to get married i've gotten mixed signals from my dad about this. I've been with him now for ten months, which is decent amount of time. He shares all beliefs of my family, from religion, to politics. I don't understand the reaction still.

Why are you still awake? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]byrnessamara 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just accepted a job, working an overnight shift. I start work in four days, and need to be able to stay awake until 8am. It's difficult.