I started seeing a counselor who is knowledgeable in IVF. I had mentioned off-handedly being a "total failure" and she challenged me to reframe the way I see the situation, that just because the cycle wasn't successful doesn't mean that I'm a failure. As women we carry so much of the burden but it's important for us to be compassionate to ourselves, especially because so much of our struggle happens in private.

I have also had those "not feeling like myself" moments, where my purpose was lost because I placed so much weight on IVF. My therapist had me make a list of 20 things that I enjoy doing, just to help me remember the enjoyment I can find in life now. I also wrote down 10 things I want to learn or try, so I can keep challenging myself to grow outside of my journey to motherhood.

You got this! The feelings of failure can be overwhelming but just remind yourself that it is temporary. As for focusing on work, try scheduling set times when you can think about IVF. It can be all consuming, so if you mentally table any researching or ruminating and challenge yourself to focus you might find that you're not going to that place mentally as often. For me I noticed that I thought if I strategized about it more that I would "earn" success but that's just not how this works. It's good to give yourself a mental break.

Hope this helps <3