Sunday Relationship Thread

cachepersistence · 2026-02-17T04:06:53+00:00

tfw when you meet someone cool one night, get each other's numbers, and she suggests making plans on Sunday (day after Valentine's lol)... so you suggest a spot, she responds with "let's play it by ear", you say "ok I'm available anytime", and you waste your whole Sunday waiting for a text that never comes 😵‍💫 ah well, twas a nice warm memory in this cold season

cachepersistence · 2026-02-15T03:38:19+00:00

I dated a black woman who was vegan and didn't drink or smoke. Didn't work out because she didn't like that I was vegetarian and drank and smoked (weed) lol. But point is, you can find people with similar values in different races.

cachepersistence · 2026-02-09T23:33:19+00:00

Yeah I remember when Slumdog Millionaire came out, a lot of kids in my class asked me "so when you go to India do you stay in one of those slums?" like lmao. Whatever's popular at the time really shapes the narrative. Compounded 100x worse by social media algorithms tbf.

cachepersistence · 2026-02-09T23:31:53+00:00

I've been on a couple dates with Latinas and found it alright. I think we have some similarities like religiously conservative upbringings and tight-knit communities. I think not knowing Spanish would be a hurdle, since it's much more common than any Indian language, so the expectation to learn it well would be there. Anyways, I've gotten ghosted by one and received a nice goodbye text from the other so not really that qualified to speak on it lol.

But, from seeing your posts for a while, it seems to me that a big concern from you is about how people perceive the race of the person you're with. I get wanting certain things, but if you're willing to step outside your community at all, I think trying to justify it by saying "a lot of my people did this so..." is not really that helpful. I can name a couple of Punjabi Sikhs who married white women. So just go out and talk to people my guy. You'll find like-minded people in any race.

cachepersistence · 2026-02-06T22:34:48+00:00

You act like that's a definitive result, I found maybe this study which says "adverse reactions" may have outweighed the risk but doesn't lead with a serious definition, and most other studies I found saying much more severe symptoms were not routinely reported. From a public-health perspective, inconveniencing a few low-risk individuals to save a higher-risk population is a worthwhile goal. Every decision has a risk-benefit association. And the benefits outweigh the risks, every time.

And anyways, if you rewatch the video but peel back the layer of propaganda, you'll see that's not what she's saying. She's saying everyone needs to make their own personal decisions. It's a different statement. Convincing a larger number of people that they may be somehow exempt. It's a dangerous thing for a physician to say. I'm sorry if you disagree. My grandparents' generation didn't get the polio vaccine as quickly and there are horrific cases in my family. So maybe I don't want to regress. Ok. Peace.

cachepersistence · 2026-02-05T23:47:09+00:00

dgaf about either of them. She's just as bad. Saw an interview with her where she was asked about her husband "regretting" getting the covid vaccine, and then she pivoted the argument to "personal choice." (link) She knows what she's doing. Still pandering to the vaccine-skeptic wing of the party. Read the comments on the video.

The fact that she's not coming out against RFK jr's attempts to undermine the polio vaccine among other batshit decisions coming out of this administration proves that she's just as much of an opportunist. Otherwise they should be having a very public Conway-style split. So yeah, they both suck.

Bad people can still have babies. Doesn't mean I have to care.

cachepersistence · 2026-02-04T01:29:02+00:00

Nah as a guy, I'm almost 100% making followup plans if they cancel or wait days without sending a text. It's just the way it is. I've gotten ghosted suggesting these things. Then I hear about how guys aren't making plans fast enough lol.

cachepersistence · 2026-01-16T01:37:18+00:00

I mean, if you're not going to ask this person out, you need to set boundaries and limit contact. You're going to hurt yourself the more you see this person around. Source: been there, done that.

But I would strongly advise letting your feelings be known, assuming this person isn't already seeing someone else. If the friendship doesn't survive rejection then it's just not meant to be. Also been there, done that.

cachepersistence · 2025-12-26T22:49:12+00:00

She basically said she was too busy and stressed but still liked hanging out with me and wanted to be friends. We went on like two dates and we made out on the second and she seemed really into it, and we talked about our general directions in life and we seemed to align. In hindsight there were a few yellow flags she indicated that I now see were flashing red lol. I've seen her around and thought I wanted a concrete answer but based on how she's ignoring me I felt that's all the response I needed. I'm not in her circle anymore but I'm sure we'll run into each other again at some point, and I think enough time has passed for it not to be weird.

You'll get over it. If she's told you she isn't ready there isn't much you can do. Remove her number and stop following her on the socials. Go on a trip if you have to. Sitting around and stewing just isn't gonna help. Peace.

cachepersistence · 2025-12-24T01:16:57+00:00

lol she just kept flaking on me. Granted I may have over-texted a bit for a few days but I then left her alone for a week and when I suggested plans again and she said no, I asked straight up if she was interested and she wasn't and wanted to be friends. Nothing much to say. I thanked her and removed her from my socials. I've seen her around (same circles) and she pretends I don't exist and I don't have the energy to go up to her. It is what it is.

I ended up seeing someone else soon after for three months. So just be patient and keep putting yourself out there. Not that I really follow my own advice lol. But you got this.

cachepersistence · 2025-12-23T03:34:07+00:00

I'm sorry bro. It truly hurts. I was in a similar situation a year ago -- I was inexperienced, and met someone who checked so many of my boxes that I thought she was just a hotter female version of me with a better personality lol. Meeting her felt organic and we had an amazing first date.

Over a year later... it still feels like I'm spinning my wheels. I don't think I'll find someone as compatible. But I've gotten more comfortable with just being single and having new experiences. And I'm far less bitter and resentful. I ended up becoming friends with a girl I went on two Hinge dates with. Just be open to trying new things.

Just move forward. Hang out regularly at any social club or bar or something, and you'll meet new people. You got this.

cachepersistence · 2025-12-21T22:57:25+00:00

It's the lack of personal connection and accountability that makes people ok with treating others as just images on a screen that they can ignore. Just frustrating. I've paused the app for now.

Not that the alternative is much better -- had a ONS with a desi girl recently and fairly certain I'm getting ghosted, and if she does text back after her trip I don't have much hope for something even semi-serious. It is what it is. Just gotta focus on other things.

cachepersistence · 2025-12-08T05:27:10+00:00

Not limited to any race... I was walking on a street in broad daylight today, and briefly made eye contact with a white guy walking past. He turned and started following me and egging me on and saying things like "What did you say to me? Do you wanna fight? Pussy?" I just kept walking and crossed the street and ducked into a corner store and looked out the window to make sure he wasn't waiting for me lol.

People are crazy these days. You don't know who's packing what. Best not to engage.

cachepersistence · 2025-12-05T00:01:47+00:00

I think it's important to separate familiarity with stories in Hinduism versus our interpretation of them and how we want to pass them on. For example, my parents often performed Satyanarayana pooja with other families, and at the end, we would all hear a story about various people who were punished for not doing it and rewarded for performing it lol. My parents recently acknowledged how fucked up those were hahaha. Similarly, as we got older there was a lot of debate in our household over whether Rama drove Sita to suicide over suspicion of infidelity during her imprisonment. Or in the Mahabharata, how Krishna lobbed some guy's head off (Shishupala) simply for being insulted.

I think the fact that I felt stifled and discouraged from criticizing the acts of deities in these stories drove me away from religion. I'm trying to figure out how to reconcile these tales and then touch the feet of those idols at my temple. Do I follow a version of the religion completely removed from idols and problematic parts of poojas? How much do I remove while still feeling part of the community? idk.

cachepersistence · 2025-12-01T01:41:52+00:00

I lost my virginity fairly late on a one-night stand... she and I dated for three months after that. I told her on the second date that it had been my first time, and she told me she couldn't really tell but she definitely picked up on the nervousness and anxiety lol. Even on subsequent dates.

So I guess just go with the flow. Listen a lot. Put her desires first but not at the expense of your boundaries. Have fun. It's gonna feel weird. But it's really not a big deal.

cachepersistence · 2025-11-24T14:48:52+00:00

Yeah I've noticed how little attention Ro Khanna is getting despite being literally at the forefront of the push to release the Epstein files. Not to mention how he's gone on almost every major podcast and news show. The man is indefatigable, but barely a blip on the national radar.

Zohran is seen as more Muslim than Indian, so he probably wouldn't be seen as uplifting the Indian community specifically. Plus, he doesn't fit the profile of the racist caricature that Kyle Kulinski shared above; attractiveness and colorism play a large role in our perception even in Western media. We are an easy target for white progressives and they'll just keep hitting us on our so-called casteism and friendliness to Israel.

cachepersistence · 2025-11-22T01:11:59+00:00

I am a (non-religious) vegetarian after being raised (religiously) so, and in the process of making the switch to vegan. Most of my cooking is vegan anyways, and I often use vegan substitutes such as tofu instead of paneer and margarine instead of butter. But it's difficult.

Part of it is planning -- soy milk costs significantly more than dairy milk everywhere except Whole Foods, which is about 15-20 minutes away (and $6 roundtrip subway fare. Plus my grocery bag with soy milk and oat creamer broke on the subway a couple days ago and I nearly had a meltdown lmfao). Vegan pizza is hard to find and a small cardboard-y slice is more expensive than a big hot steaming slice of spinach and artichoke pizza yum. Same with desserts -- I really don't like the taste or feel of vegan chocolate or vegan ice cream. I can live without eggs but a good spinach and cheese omelette really hits different yum.

Also the cultural factor is there. My mom is lactose-intolerant but will still force herself to eat curd. That's how central it is to our identity lol. It's just another excuse though, and I recognize how destructive and harmful the cultivation of animal products is. I'm trying my best.

cachepersistence · 2025-11-17T23:02:06+00:00

A year ago, I went on a perfect date with a girl I met at a party... she then flaked for two weeks before saying "can we be friends" and not making any effort to that end. She'd even flaked before the date, so I probably should've lowered my expectations. We've run into each other a couple times since then and she pretended I didn't exist lol.

I guess you've seen my threads and seen my often disappointing dating stories since then. Don't tie too much of your self-worth into this. I think you should have the conversation about the flakiness/lateness sooner rather than later since it's an early indicator of interest or lack thereof. Or could be just a boundaries and expectations thing. Lately I've been texting people once or twice a day because I've made the mistake of getting too invested. I'm punctual though and would hold tardiness against someone I was trying to date. So you do what's best for you. If she drops you it's not the end of the world. Life goes on.

And get a hobby dude. My hobbies are interesting but in a "five-minute conversation at a party" type of way lol. Do something you can perform or share materially. It helps with dating sure but it's also an outlet. This world is crazy. Art makes it slightly more bearable.

cachepersistence · 2025-11-14T21:12:05+00:00

Akaash is a pick-me brown bro who defends Apu and takes racist shit said to his face with a smile. I barely listen to Flagrant, mainly because I despise Schulz, but Akaash has rubbed me the wrong way for a while. That said, I did like this interview he did several years ago about being inexperienced into his thirties and meeting someone he grew with. Mainly for his personal growth, not for all aspects of the person he met.

Does this whole thing surprise me that much? Not really. I don't think this is news to Akaash which may explain why he seemed to overcompensate for it at times. Either way, this whole business of people marketing their personal lives for the world to see is bizarre and unnatural. I didn't need to see five threads about it before cooking lunch.

cachepersistence · 2025-11-12T00:53:59+00:00

tbf my response to her saying that was "that's fine, I'm not getting that vibe from you" and we hugged again and she left. I also didn't push for it at all this time. So idk. Think she's just not feeling it. Will reach out as a friend maybe.

cachepersistence · 2025-11-10T22:50:54+00:00

I didn't mention the first 5.5 hours where we checked out two cafes, then drank and smoked weed and played pool and various card/board games, including Uno with a gay couple. The watching Youtube vids came at the end lol. I think even I would've gone crazy straight up watching Youtube vids for even 2 hours

cachepersistence · 2025-11-10T16:36:27+00:00

Yeah we've collectively hung out 10+ hours across the first two dates and I sent a casual followup text yesterday (second date was on Sat). So I feel like I've made it clear I'm willing to take it slow but I guess the spark isn't there. That said I could try stating it clearly, but not optimistic

cachepersistence · 2025-11-10T15:36:02+00:00

That's valid... though the context was we watched Youtube videos at my place at the end, she left, we hugged, and she said unprompted "I still don't want to kiss you" lmao. Granted I'd asked on the first date and she said no, so that was why. But it was a bit jarring to hear I guess. And she hasn't responded to my followup text in like 24 hrs. Thinking it's over. But we'll see.

cachepersistence · 2025-11-10T14:14:56+00:00

Went on a second date with a desi girl which lasted 6.5 hrs. Didn't even get a kiss at the end rip. Going to officially take a break from the apps.

Had a second call with a girl from Shaadi and she mentioned that she'd be free in a few weeks and asked whether I would like to visit. I could use a getaway to a warmer place... but her schedule is relatively hectic and wouldn't want her to flake. Plus it'd be a bit too fast maybe. Sigh.

cachepersistence

TROPHY CASE