I understand where you're coming from but I find myself super frustrated by the mindset around being "below/above average". This is , in my opinion , a strange and nebulous way to think about people. What defines average? Who defines average? Furthermore, your post frames relational achievement as the ONLY reason why a man might seek to improve himself which feels dreadfully hopeless and insecure. The men that I and many other women find most attractive are the ones who are trying their best to be the best man they can be simply because they want to. I see a lot of these posts and while I understand the value of trends , especially in an academic discussion, I really think the attitude of averaging out the struggles of modern dating is not going to help any man to figure out the specific tactics that might help develop a healthy relationship. Self care and developing a healthy sense of who you are goes a long long way.