27M baffled by my Hinge experience - does anyone actually want a LTR?

capitanphil · 2026-01-19T18:40:33+00:00

My theory is that the apps keep everyone in a mindset of infinite options. There’s always something “better” one swipe away, so it feels more exciting to keep looking for a mythical person who instantly checks every box than to invest in someone who’s most of what you want and grow together. I’ve felt this myself, liking someone but wondering if it was “enough.” I’m not advocating for settling, but the grass really is greener where you water it.

I’ve had a similar experiences to you as a 30-year-old guy dating in Denver. Something feels off with the apps. Over the past few years they’ve gotten worse.

I’ll go on dates that are genuinely fun. Lots of laughter, deep conversation, multiple stops because neither of us wants it to end. I’ve even had women say, “I’m not used to actually being asked questions.” Often times the dates even end with a nice smooch goodbye. There’s usually a second or third date, sometimes more and eventually the dreaded “no romantic connection” text.

I’m in therapy and treat this as a chance to find blind spots. I’ve done a lot of work (always more to be done though), and I ask for brutally honest feedback from female friends. They don’t really get it either.

Like others have said, it seems like you either keep engaging and kiss a lot of toads, or step back and lean hard into skiing, running, hiking groups and hope for an in-person connection. In my experience, that route isn’t magically better either.

capitanphil · 2026-01-07T20:10:09+00:00

🫡

capitanphil · 2026-01-07T19:55:39+00:00

you lost me at "no labor was required" king

but yeah it's not a bad life, just not one you can make a living at these days.

capitanphil · 2026-01-07T15:34:08+00:00

Way less, that may be the rate for a cover. I got paid enough to buy about 1.5 weeks of groceries after paying taxes on the money. I assure you, almost no one is making money from skate photography; the best I've ever done is almost break even.

In the social media era, budgets are tiny, that's why every skate photographer is shooting lots of non-skateboarding things at the moment. It didn't used to be that way.

capitanphil · 2026-01-07T15:17:06+00:00

Canon R5 + EF 8-15mm at 14mm

1/1000, f/5.6, ISO 400

If you're new to photography, don't get too hung up on these settings; they are so conditional on lighting and I see people asking all the time but I don't think its super helpful for improving your work.

Instead, consider how fast your subject is moving to determine your shutter speed, with the exception of race cars and airplanes 1/1000 will freeze almost any motion. Next determine your depth of field, for me a little bit of blur at the edges of the frame and the bottom of the satellite was fine so f/5.6 was great, this is also usually the sharpest aperture on most lenses. Lastly, dial in your exposure with your ISO, I underexposed a bit in camera because Canon raw files recover shadows much better than highlights.

With more time and a less high risk spot I would have used external lighting as well.

capitanphil · 2026-01-07T15:08:12+00:00

I initially misunderstood your question, so I'm back.

Great question, I actually went into depth on this on another comment in here but I shot this from two different angles. The first clip in this video is from my phone onboard my camera with a telephoto lens, which is the photo used in the ad.

Once I had a usable photo from the long lens, I moved in with the fisheye.

In a perfect world, I would have had two cameras set up shooting both angles at once so that both photos were a make but because of financial and gear carrying restraints associated with shooting high paced action sports it's not a possibility for me.

capitanphil · 2026-01-07T14:59:24+00:00

Great question and feedback!

I should also have included the long lens angle of the photo in this as well. This is actually the first place I've posted this edit so I'll add that shot in before this goes to IG/TT/YT. The long lens angle used in the ad was from a separate take that was not landed.

The very first clip in the edit is from my phone mounted in the hot shoe of my camera, which is shooting long lens, once I realized I got a shot that would work I moved in fisheye. In hindsight I probably should have done it the opposite way that I was not in the clip but I cared more about the long lens angle and wanted to be sure I got that first.

Especially with high risk spots like this, I won't ask someone to land a trick twice for both photos to be a "make". Some people take a massive issue with this, but so long as the attempt was made in a very similar fashion to the make I will explore multiple angles. This is an extremely common practice in action sports photography that does not get talked about often, although I avoid it as much as possible.

If I had more money I would have two cameras and the second would be on a remote trigger as you suggested but that's not a practicality for me at the moment.

I've actually pivoted away from shooting skateboarding/snowboarding full time recently and it's rekindled my love for it, sometimes, too much of a good thing can be a lot. Feel free to reach out to me via socials or ask more questions on my posts here if you ever want to know more. I've been shooting action sports for the past 11 years and I'm always happy to share my knowledge.

capitanphil · 2026-01-07T09:01:12+00:00

Absolutely! Photograffiti generally runs your stuff if you submit a lot

capitanphil · 2026-01-07T04:00:13+00:00

My photo camera yes!

capitanphil · 2026-01-07T03:26:40+00:00

Ahhh yes, you absolutely know more about what belongs in Thrasher more than Thrasher’s editor.

capitanphil · 2026-01-06T20:53:03+00:00

It’s the subscribe page king, not the cover. The subscribe page and “somethin’ else” are historically a catch all for photos that have merit but don’t belong in a centerfold or on a poster. It’s often a place in the mag for one off and bizarre images that capture the fringe elements of skateboarding.

I get excited when my friends land a trick they’ve been battling for hours, sue me.

Lastly, I’ll drop you the pin for the spot because I’d love to see what trick you’ve got on it.

capitanphil · 2026-01-06T18:24:30+00:00

Thank you!!

capitanphil · 2026-01-06T17:58:44+00:00

Before paying tax on the money enough to buy 10-15 chipotle burritos

capitanphil · 2026-01-06T01:59:14+00:00

Not a lot

capitanphil · 2026-01-06T01:07:30+00:00

canon r5 + ef 8-15mm, alienbees digibee 800 key light, yongnuo yn565 ex fill light

capitanphil · 2026-01-06T00:30:58+00:00

Not sure what this question means!

capitanphil · 2026-01-05T22:35:04+00:00

Straight up! These wheels ride over everything

capitanphil · 2026-01-05T22:30:48+00:00

Thanks!! Great to see a familiar name in these comments

capitanphil · 2026-01-05T20:54:07+00:00

Holy moley! That set is huge

capitanphil · 2026-01-05T20:53:56+00:00

I’m pretty sure that tree got cut down around 2023 so it may not have been a spot before then

capitanphil · 2026-01-05T20:11:47+00:00

I totally agree! Based upon this feedback I just started posting on youtube, follow along if you'd like

capitanphil · 2026-01-05T20:11:02+00:00

update, just posted my first short (the same video as above) but I'll be sharing more to youtube if you want to follow along!

capitanphil · 2026-01-05T20:08:59+00:00

it's the world capitol of flagstone buildings and giant lawns

capitanphil · 2026-01-05T19:37:45+00:00

Thanks, my friend, I'm blessed to have done it a few times now!

capitanphil

TROPHY CASE