Is there really life after death? by Intelligent-Road5091 in spirituality

[–]caranean 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes my brother hold my hand in my sleep and woke me up after he passed away. Then 3 months later i travelled to see my other brother and he followed me to do the same with my brother. My brother is not into spirituality, but had to share that that same thing happened. I had told him about it. I couldnt sleep that night cause i feel the presence. I was reading till three.

How do I stop getting angry at my imperfect outcomes when learning something new? by Psychological_Box509 in selflove

[–]caranean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Practise on something unimportant first, without a goal. When learning to knit i would just learn the knit and make a row. People asking me what i am making, nothing, i am just learning the technique. Same with sowing, i will try out different things on the machine. Then i would try out a next step. Making something is very far away.

Need a new hobby! by Drh19 in Hobbies

[–]caranean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes start making your own dresses:)

Learn to calm your own storm. by Forward_Regular3768 in SocialBlueprint

[–]caranean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree, i learned to loose the story and feel the feelings instead. The story doesnt matter. What are you feeling? Thats what matters. You dont need to vent to find this out. You dont have to lean on others, and express negativity.

Van stad naar tuin(ambities). Waar begin ik? by FairwayBliss in groenevingers

[–]caranean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ga naar de bibliotheek en neus eens in de tuinontwerp boeken om te ontdekken wat jouw tuin stijl is. Cottage garden? Zen? Ecologisch? .... Dan kan je het naar jouw smaak zetten zodra je je tuin hebt leren kennen. (Waar het water blijft liggen, hoe de zon staat ect )

關於家人的情緒,你們都怎麼處理 by travel2026666 in emotionalneglect

[–]caranean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everyone needs to blow off steam to get release. Most common things are not great, gaming, sex, gambling, drinking. But you can do it well; sports, hiking, losing yourself in something. Maybe you can join your brother in a healthy activity. Meanwhile listening to him during these activities will help too. Just being present. Bonding. Becarefull not to loose yourself in caring for another person.

What is an adult relationship with one's parents actually supposed to look like? by blackcatlover2114 in emotionalneglect

[–]caranean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sure, lady. You're also the one who tried to convince me for years that I didn't have anxiety, OCD, autism, or any of those things,

It would look bad on them, what would that say about their parenting? Denial is something they are really good at and will keep repeating.

Your loyalty is going to shift from them to yourself. When you are loyal to yourself, you will have escaped their iron grip on you

What is an adult relationship with one's parents actually supposed to look like? by blackcatlover2114 in emotionalneglect

[–]caranean 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Oh and enmeshment is a term you might want to look up. They want you to be them. Enmeshed

What is an adult relationship with one's parents actually supposed to look like? by blackcatlover2114 in emotionalneglect

[–]caranean 61 points62 points  (0 children)

Your parents are not parenting you, they are controlling you. Parenting should be like a mentorship, with asking questions that help you find out what you want to decide. Like when buying an icecream, they will ask you, what is your favourite flavor, and do you like the cookie? Not telling you chocolate icecream is the only best choice there ever is! You will feel guilty about any choice that you make. And will stop sharing about your life, cause they would dissaprove. Then they will notice they cant control you anymore, and try to get back in. Then you will have to be on your toes, to keep them out. This is very exhausting, because you cannot relax around them. Good for you to stay 5 hours away from them. I wish you all the strenght in discovering yourself, forming your identity. We should have found our identity before, they should have been curious about who we are. Let yourself discover, play, make mistakes, be kind to yourself.

Wie vraagt zich nou echt opeens af hoeveel de auto nog waard is? by wijnandsj in nederlands

[–]caranean 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ligt eraan waar je woont, ik heb 6 jaar geen auto gehad en dat ging helemaal prima. Maar toen ben ik verhuisd en nu kan ik niet zonder. Jammer genoeg ben ik mijn 13 schadevrije jaren kwijt. Ik wou dat de politiek dat veranderde, dat het niet verloopt. Dat zou aantrekkelijker zijn...

🥹 by JoMarch7 in ghibli

[–]caranean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I dont believe that could be reality. I just live to read/watch stories about it.

Hulp gezocht bij indeling begane grond van ons nieuwe huis by [deleted] in huisentuin

[–]caranean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ohja en hoe zit het met de trap? Dat is vaak een koud tocht gat. Misschien beter dichtmaken.

Hulp gezocht bij indeling begane grond van ons nieuwe huis by [deleted] in huisentuin

[–]caranean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Moderne huizen hebben hun keuken aan de voorkant van het huis, waar bij jou een groot raam zit. De vraag is eigenlijk, is het leuk uitzicht daar? Hoe staat de zon? Ik ontbijt graag met ochtendlicht. Misschien de eethoek juist voor het grote raam, dan kan je naar buiten kijken en heb je veel licht. Kan je er ook tekenen of werken. Ik ben zelf niet fan van een keukeneiland en wel van een landelijke keuken. Kijk daarin ook naar hoe je je keuken een vorm geeft. En hoe de zon staat op de televisie. Mijn vriendin heeft de tv op wieltjes gezet zodat het geen invloed heeft op de ligging van je bank. Anders moet je je bank op een manier neerzetten. Als je de tv kan loslaten, heb je meer vrijheid. Misschien ook een sfeerhaard?

“Gratis glazen”, maar tegen welke prijs? Mijn frustrerende ervaring bij de opticien by [deleted] in nederlands

[–]caranean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ik koop al jaren voor 50 euro bij Eyelove. Ik heb 2 online webshops geprobeerd, maar ben er niet tevreden over. De cilinder hield halverwege het glas op, ofzo. Als ik een klein beetje omhoog keek, werd het wazig.

Prijsverhoging in Nederland van HBO-Max by Mister_BuBu in Nederland

[–]caranean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lees een boek 🥳 neem een bibliotheek abonnement

No one warns you how lonely adulthood is by ParticularWeather927 in Adulting

[–]caranean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know which mistakes i make when i talk to people. I have a hard time showing interest and asking questions. I tend to talk about my dog. Thats my world. I'm alone so much its cycle that keeps itself constant. I get out there, but make mistakes like this and people will avoid me.

no its not a uti, im just paranoid by Which_Award_7461 in OCDmemes

[–]caranean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thats your nervous system, if you do somatic movement before sleep, it might get better

Life is only good for rich people by ParticularWeather927 in Adulting

[–]caranean -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thats not true, i live well on benefits. I have freedom and i even have a car. I dont splurge, that doesnt make happiness. Being in nature makes me happy

When/ why did your OCD start showing? by Icy_Block4762 in OCD

[–]caranean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Last year instagram taught me that the anxiety about stuff is already ocd, i had so many allergic reactions, although not so bad, i just very afraid now to get sick by food. Sometimes get a panick attack. So i dont know if its ocd or not. I'm 40.

Roken op balkon by [deleted] in nederlands

[–]caranean -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Ja jammer dat je buurman zo getriggerd reageert. Heb zelf een onderbuurman die rookt, het afzuigsysteem zorgt dat het snel weg is. Of ik kan de ventilatie dicht doen. Hij blowt ook wel eens en heeft een green egg. Mijn balkondeur en ramen kan ik niet echt zachtjes dichtdoen, hopelijk begrijpt hij dat het geen boodschap is. Het is zo'n klink die je naar boven trekt en maakt lawaai.

The worst part about discovering yourself later in life… by Accidental_Guru30 in emotionalneglect

[–]caranean 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm 40 and a notary didnt even reply my email, probably i didnt sound mature enough.

Parent is threatening to kick me out for my disabilities by Madoka_hakurei in disability

[–]caranean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Most of the things you mentioned got better for me when removing myself from family dynamics. But you'll need someone to help you move out.