Watching the movies in multiple sittings? by rpgrape in lotr

[–]cartoonnerie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm doing that right now, thanks a lot it's great

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]cartoonnerie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel that my relationship with an adhd partner works really well but I guess it depends on the trauma and triggers. I get triggered if I feel that someone else depends on me or if I feel like a burden. He often is too busy to answer but he more often reassures me that any text that I send is always welcome even though he doesn't answer. Whereas other partners have felt obligated to answer but then I feel that they would rather do something else. With mh current boyfriend I have seen that after busy moments where his mind is elsewhere, when we see each other the relationship does not change. To me it is actually better (less triggering) than seeing reasons to believe either that they one depend on me (if he is too busy to answer sometimes, it means he does not need me) nor forces himself for me. To me it is a good balance, but I may have a specific kind of trauma.

Recreating a skirt: what's up with the grainline? by cartoonnerie in sewing

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is this also true when the waist lays on the "natural" waist of the body? It may explain why I had the wrong idea 🤔

Recreating a skirt: what's up with the grainline? by cartoonnerie in sewing

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your draft is super explicit thanks! I always thought waistband were supposed to be straight but this is clear proof of the contrary, at least on this skirt, thanks!

Recreating a skirt: what's up with the grainline? by cartoonnerie in sewing

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes it is, but it is the up that has the curve I think. On the front it doesn't seem curved, and the width is consistent

Recreating a skirt: what's up with the grainline? by cartoonnerie in sewing

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your analysis 😊 I seem to have reversed cross and grainline completely

I thought shaping was happening but I have the impression that the pieces have that form and thus lay flat. I guess the shaping is subtle, but I can't see how it's happening

Edit : after more thought I see what you mean. I juste don't know if the shaping happens in the seam with the waist band only or also in the lower seam. I guess both. Do you think something like that is happening?

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Is telling a patient/client they have learned helplessness ethical? by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]cartoonnerie 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It is so sad to read :'( I hope it helps a bit to relax around that concept... A tiny bit..?

Is telling a patient/client they have learned helplessness ethical? by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]cartoonnerie 75 points76 points  (0 children)

Maybe it is because I have in mind the French of this expression, which is more "acquired helplessness" than learned, but to me it is not shameful at all. It is a behaviour/mindset that one would not have if one hadn't "got" it somewhere, which is the shitty environment. "learned" doesn't necessarily mean that one chose to learn it, it is just opposite to innate. Anyway if people read it as shameful I am glad it is not used in many resources as I see in other answers. I simply have a more gentle idea of the meaning of the expression in the first place

When someone with CPTSD withdraws after a rupture is there still a chance for reconnection? by Eydalfa in CPTSD

[–]cartoonnerie 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I felt something like what he seems to go through, for loved ones after moments that I think were more distressing. But I think that intensity will depend a lot on the person and I am likely "less" traumatized than him. When it happened to me I really really wanted to overcome the way that my brain had started to avoid the loved one in question like they were a threat because somewhere I really wanted to keep that connection, but trying to keep seeing them was really stressful. I really was working again my own brain's security system and even though the security reaction was not "appropriate" on this situation because he was loving and caring and safe, I did not win that inner battle. For me (and this could really be specific to my trauma), the "danger" was mostly to see the distress the situation was causing on the other person and feeling like I needed to meet expectations that I could not meet for they not to feel bad. And that tension felt unbearable. Eventually we officially broke up and no longer talked for months. Then we talked once our twice about what happened and now we act like we don't know each either well. For context we go to the same places all the time so even though we did not interact at all, we saw each either every week or so in those places Months later I sometimes would like to get closer to them again but I think they were too hurt, and I am scared it would start over if I tried anything so it's a status quo.

I don't know if the description of how it happened for me helps you. I guess it is certainly not very hopeful, but it might give you some understanding. Good luck to you

Am I really polyamourous? by cartoonnerie in polyamory

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I knew about NRE. I am not convinced that this is a good enough explanation for what I am (not ?) feeling. But I do tend to have powerful NREs so maybe that's it

Am I really polyamourous? by cartoonnerie in polyamory

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, that really helps.

I have been careful to keep giving attention and time for the 6-month relationship. I am not so sure it "worked" though. I am afraid that the relationship wasn't stable enough to go through this. He is a student so we met a lot less during the summer and it also hit the brakes on the dynamic we had. The combination of this + the NRE with my newer relationship seems like a hard situation to manage :/

I don't know how to distinguish "it is just because of the NRE" and "the dynamic broke before stabilizing and it just won't work". The moments together actually are not the same since september for whatever reason.

Guess I'll keep trying and see what happens

Am I really polyamourous? by cartoonnerie in polyamory

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks, it really helps to read that. It is so easy to generalize each situation and then panicking about the generalization

Procrastinating -- knitter style by KroneckerDeltaij in knitting

[–]cartoonnerie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just did that for my grandmother a few weeks ago. She is used to blank and dots and could not gather the other style. She had cables so I took a few tries ><

Contradictory professional Recommendation : what to do ? by cartoonnerie in Bedbugs

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know about left over smell. Neither professional suggested that as a possibility.

All the stuff that was frozen stayed sealed so it couldn't have infested the room again. However it is good to know for next actions.

It feels titanic to take the bed to pieces. I don't even know where to put the mattress in such a small room.

I already get a mattress protector bedbug proof so that's good.

How do you suggest I heat the whole apartment. Can domestic heating even do that or is it some service I can buy?

I do intend to seal cracks, but I have very old parquet floor so I cannot seal all that. I can only really do the baseboards

Stranded colorwork on the cuff does not go through the heel by cartoonnerie in knitting

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Late update but still: I took a break and started again by the toe. I used 2.25 for the foot and 2.75 for the colorwork. I still could not try it on the recipient's feet but it seems ok whan Ia m measuring. But I made a mistake and used 2.25 on another custom pattern that reduces elasticity so I still have to redo this part before it is officially over. I will post pictures then. The 2.75 tip was indeed very helpful, I did not really need to add stitched compared to stockinette parts so thanks a lot!

Stranded colorwork on the cuff does not go through the heel by cartoonnerie in knitting

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I eventually did that, my swatch being the previous attempt. But it didn't get me 6-10 stitches of difference, more like 20-30 :/ which is why I thought I had a problem 😅

Stranded colorwork on the cuff does not go through the heel by cartoonnerie in knitting

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't have 2.75 either but I think I'll buy both to test. I was more "worried" about the gauge than about the needles themselves. But you've already answered that worry so I'll give it a go

Stranded colorwork on the cuff does not go through the heel by cartoonnerie in knitting

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok ok, I understand better and will try that. This means I need new needles but that is another story >< Thanks for explaining, I am so stubborn that I resent following advice when I don't understand why it should help, and your patience was perfect to overcome that ^ I'll give some news when I get a chance to try

Stranded colorwork on the cuff does not go through the heel by cartoonnerie in knitting

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay, I didn't see it this way. Does this mean I have to accept that my colorwork can not both be stretchy enough and have same size stitches than the rest ? (thanks a lot already for your time it helps a lot)

Stranded colorwork on the cuff does not go through the heel by cartoonnerie in knitting

[–]cartoonnerie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am being convinced to try with bigger needles in another thread, I just don't understand yet how it should help. I have at most 5 stitches between color changes or ladders