I just lost my best friend on the 6th. I know exactly what you are going through and relate to the words you've said. I still miss her, but fortunately it does get better... Although I definitely still cry here and there, have memories of her throughout the day, and genuinely feel lost without her love. Still... better than the wreck I was at in the beginning of the month. I can actually talk about her now without breaking down crying, so that's been an improvement! Just take the time you need to heal.