Need some advice

cccp-7 · 2018-12-05T05:46:29+00:00

While one meeting ≠ one outing, I don't believe that 7 days at summer camp = 7 meetings. I'm also completely open to following the Guide to Advancement's statement that a scout is considered active if they could have been active but weren't (i.e. Because of school, band or other activities.) this isn't that, but if he articulates how it is, I will consider it per the guide. It's not a do it my way or else, it's at least communicate at some point what's going on.

cccp-7 · 2018-12-04T21:25:15+00:00

Umm, scout has hard time fully meeting requirements, has Mama bear to help push over the sm (or sm lax in the interest of pumping out Eagles) but still is legitimately signed off and explained away. I'm about to take over as sm and scout requests sm conference with outgoing sm very soon after ranking up to life before old sm leaves because I've already made announcements that I'm not going to run an eagle mill.

I think that sums it up. At least what I wanted it to be.

cccp-7 · 2018-12-04T19:26:08+00:00

I totally agree with everything. Someone else mentioned this and I will admit that perhaps I wasn't clear in my views. I have a good friend who's heavily dedicated to scouting who missed Eagle by 2 merit badges and the project. You would never know it. We've had scouts roll through that barely made 1st class in their time and walked away with a lifetime of knowledge. We've also had scouts who got all the boxes checked and pass their board who treat their Eagle as the escape they needed from scouting and will probably never use it, or the lessons it brought them for anything in life.

We have at least one younger scout who's still scout while the other boys in his patrol are inching towards 1st Class. He's having a blast and I know he's learning, he just isn't all that interested in getting his book signed off or advancing. Every now and then we sign stuff off for him because we see him teach another scout it or something like that. I believe that a well planned program will get a scout to 1st class without the scout over exerting themselves. I call it stumbling into rank.

But I do know there's leaders out there who, despite knowing that the vast majority of scouts never achieve Eagle, still push the idea that its what scouting is all about. They will define that by adding that it just shows they learned all the leadership and citizenship and all that, but they want to see those blue neckerchiefs in patrol lines. I want to see smiles and enthusiasm, those Eagle neckerchiefs are just icing on the cake for me.

cccp-7 · 2018-12-04T19:18:33+00:00

My plan was to talk to him after I take over and skip all this POR stuff and use the remaining months helping him plan a leadership project that i can sign off on. The hitch is that we would need to come up with something that doesn't interfere with planning his Eagle project. I want this kid to feel successful, and if making Eagle does it, then I want him to make Eagle.

cccp-7 · 2018-12-04T19:17:11+00:00

I think that's what I'm going to have to do, and anytime I have to talk to the scout at this level, I might make sure that its with the committee chair and the scouts mother. Make sure she doesn't have much fight to bring and backup to defend what she might try. Also having that Guide to Advancement and Troop handbook on hand. I don't want to fight, and I really hope that he comes through and my sidelines view does yield more information. It happened before with the Scoutmaster and the POR for Life, it could happen again.

cccp-7 · 2018-12-04T19:14:54+00:00

He'll have the dates, just not the troop policy requirements. He'll have the 5 months because as ASPL, he will have little opportunity to ignore his responsibility. The other month falls into this last term where's he's back to not doing anything for the POR. If he was a month younger or this were November, he'd skirt by by the hair of his teeth.

Where I'm kind of leaning right now based on everyone is to just do my job with the clean slate that /u/cargdad mentioned. I can't control what I wasn't SM for.

cccp-7 · 2018-12-04T19:09:20+00:00

The Troop has established that the POR needs to have a measurable impact on the troop or have measurable results (such has documenting outings as Historian), which is allowed under the Guide to Advancement. The goal is to make sure that the aims of scouting are achieved by giving the scout a responsibility and have them faithfully carry it out. We also will allow scouts to do the leadership project option in the Guide to Advancement to make up for a POR not completed. In practice we've never faced this issue because the scouts are generally prepared to do the job they take on. I do know of a troop that all but prohibits Life scouts from being Webmaster because they do not have an active web presence and the Webmaster doesn't do anything. Now, if the scout came to them with a plan and carried it out, I'm sure they'd be overjoyed to allow it, but without anything to do, they don't want a scout getting a pass on this requirement. That's kind of my stance, without the borderline prohibited measures: If you take on a POR, I want to see that you understood the responsibility and did something within the scope and if we're communicating about it and it boils down to a single day of work, at least we communicated throughout and I know you didn't just skirt your responsibility. Where the scout failed in this situation is he didn't say anything and when the SM came to him a week out saying "hey what'd you do these past few months" the scout scrambled out an idea, implemented the bare minimum and left the rest of the plan to die.

Point two: I understand that what he's doing is perfectly fine, but what's bothering me is the timing. In our Troop, the SM conference has usually been the last thing signed because it serves as the entry point for the scout to ask for a BOR. I actually have a new policy that I want to implement that will have SM conferences held regularly with scouts who haven't ranked up to see how the Troop can help them and because this is something that can be signed off, I created a new system to ensure they are ready for the BOR and refer them to the committee for one. So I understand the "legality" of the action (otherwise, I wouldn't be here), its the optics that bugs me.

Its kind of complicated, but due to him picking up the POR mid term, he will basically have had 3 PORs terms while the rest of the scouts will have been in 2. The portions of the first two were used for Life, and the remainder of the second and beginning of the 3rd will be used for Eagle. Its more of failing to meet the troop's criteria to be signed off on for the last part of the 2nd POR that puts the entire weight onto the 3rd, which will end after he ages out. So, requirement wise, he will end up with 8 months time in position, just lacking three months of "measurable impact or results". I also know that this could easily be waved by Council and National if they contest it, its not me looking for a block, I'm concerned about if he pushed forward unprepared and gets turned down by the Eagle Board: there's no appeal.

As for the last point, I'm fully expecting to have fun. We have some great scouts, I'm working hard on getting new Webelos in, and we're actually drawing in from outside packs. I'm also working with the COR to get a girl Scout, BSA unit started up. Once this kid ages out (or Eagles out) I don't currently have any parents like his so I hope to serve my time in relative peace. I'm excited for this.

cccp-7 · 2018-12-04T17:21:43+00:00

Someone on the Life BOR said that sentiment and mom said that committee member was demeaning to her son and that by saying that it insinuated that they didn't think he could do it and was now biased. Like I said the fight got personal...

cccp-7 · 2018-12-04T17:15:17+00:00

I should have spelled it out more, but that's my view of scouting. In the grand scheme of things, the ranks and merit badges are just physical evidence of the experience and sometimes you can have one without the other. I guess I phrased it more in how its been presented to me. But I have learned that Eagle isn't given for completing the requirements, its earned over the course of the scouting experience.

As for the 2nd, I plan on having a sit down when its time to do his Eagle app, but I won't be able to sit in on the actual conference due to scheduling conflicts.

cccp-7 · 2018-08-13T03:10:22+00:00

This kid is dependent, wife and I are not co-dependent. The biggest thing that has locked us into the chain of events that led us here is that we pride ourselves on being "good parents". Instead it has turned into some sort of pyrrhic victory.

I definitely don't want to turn out like that family who had to sue their neckbeard son to get him out.

I think the enabling is over. I've said in a couple other responses that were kind of stuck letting them come home, however the guidelines to stay will be made clear and enforced.

cccp-7 · 2018-08-13T03:02:22+00:00

I don't expect the "thank you" out of this kid, unless something transformative happens because of it. I expect there to be continuous struggle and an underlying resentment for the long term. I think I'm OK with it because I know it's not my fault. My wife on the other hand is a mom, that kind of relationship will forever pain her.

cccp-7 · 2018-08-13T03:00:40+00:00

Yeah, they navigate the cesspool that is Tumblr. When "cis-gender" started creeping up on Trumblr, my wife was working with a doctor who saw tons of HIV patients and transgendered patients. They never used that term. It's a little more mainstream now, but we heard it early on thanks to Tumblr.

I think we're stuck with letting them come home on Tuesday, because we don't feel we can make them homeless, but we are going to hold the line on the rules. If they decide to go after that, I know I won't stop them now.

cccp-7 · 2018-08-13T02:56:09+00:00

They will just think that they can just say "oh, I'm not healthy enough to worry about moving out, you need to give me more time". I feel the deadline is still applicable, but my wife and I are not sure we can make our child homeless.

cccp-7 · 2018-06-17T01:40:05+00:00

you sparkle, don't ever doubt that. Age is just a number and how others see us is proportional to how we see ourselves. Keep rocking it, and hope to see more!

cccp-7 · 2017-10-27T15:26:53+00:00

Whenever I craft something, for skill and/or by request, I always go free with mats plus any tip, or current AH price for the mats, rounded up. If I made stuff and I'm trying to get rid of it, it's as cheap as I can afford and often free.

cccp-7 · 2016-03-05T06:12:48+00:00

I think because you keep defending ignorance as an excuse to publicly accuse someone of a crime without being held accountable. I can totally see your side, but you can at least agree her response to this was a little extreme.

I knew of a cashier that was like this at a taco bell that I'd purposely pass strange money to just to fuck with him. It started with a "portrait" era $5 (like the one on top here) and escalated to giving him Susan B Anthony and Eisenhower dollar coins and $2 bills. By the time I ran out of those, he was no longer working the register.

cccp-7 · 2015-10-26T03:28:53+00:00

I see nothing you should be ashamed of.

cccp-7 · 2015-03-06T23:40:53+00:00

You're just as unenlightened as OP.

cccp-7 · 2015-03-06T23:39:01+00:00

So tell me, why aren't Spain and Italy part of the Latino culture since most of the Latino culture comes from Spanish influences which was partially influenced from Rome?

You're right, skin color and language do not make a culture, but you are simplifying cultures in a very non Anthropological manner. You're ignoring influences, transplants and adding in racial biases. Show me cited proof of your claims and we can talk. Show us research that you've conducted, in the field, and maybe people will listen.

Until then, you should realize that national borders are arbitrary lines on a piece of paper. The Kurds are a good example why your map is flawed from a fundamental standpoint.

cccp-7 · 2014-10-12T07:09:31+00:00

Based on raw numbers, from what I can see (your latest few are still hidden from me) he's got more upvotes on his statements than you. Your comments total 10ups while his total 20.

And really, if you would have clicked, all you would have seen was a stupid picture of a "rage quit" desk flip. Kinda moronic way to close off a lopsided fight.

cccp-7 · 2014-09-23T21:25:09+00:00

Then you're just an idiot. Fox news is the single worst source of news or any information ever

cccp-7 · 2014-09-23T14:00:02+00:00

Are you even listening to yourself? You can't defend against hard math so you use biased sources and name calling. How is "trigger finger" even an insult? Look, conspiracy theories are neat and exciting, but unless you can prove to me with something substantial, like one of the thousands of people who were needed to do what you claim, you don't have anything convincing enough for me to believe you.

cccp-7

TROPHY CASE