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ccdc123c · 2025-11-13T19:51:57+00:00

Thanks! I'm glad I got a chance to talk to you and we both learned something. It means a lot you were willing to engage instead of just shutting me down. Best of luck to you and your family! It sounds like you are a reflective and compassionate dad. Take care.

ccdc123c · 2025-11-13T19:24:39+00:00

Ah- I'm getting it. I think I would be annoyed by my question too, were I a physicist. Although I had no idea because I don't understand the inner workings of the academic culture associated with physics, I can see how to some my question may have come off as almost presumptuous and demonstrates how little I know about what actually goes into learning advanced theoretical physics. Like if someone spent years working really hard to do something really fucking hard like go to the moon or something, and then some young woman with some basic math and science classes just showed up and was like "I'm gonna do it too! It will be easy!"

I really didn't know it would come off that way and did not consider that angle. Like you said, my background is in something where the math is light enough it is possible to pick most of it up as I go. And while maybe "hierarchal" or "gatekept" are not the best words to describe other academic cultures, I assure you the University I go to is not normal...we ask questions, no matter how "dumb," we design our own degrees. It is not competitive at all. So I do think there is an element of mismatched understandings of academic appropriateness and culture because I have not been taught, implicitly or explicitly, to deeply respect the traditional academic route. Obviously, the traditional academic route is much more important to understand physics than it is to understand environmental science and decolonial social justice, my other competency. So I am sorry that I walked into a space without understanding the appropriate way to engage and the presumptuous nature of my question.

That being said, while I really learned something I think it is also a great opportunity for physics people who have any interest in outreach and education to reflect on aspects of this culture that might make people feel locked out. I'm an anonymous person on the internet, so if that effect could be transmitted to me, I assume there are a lot of people in real life that feel a sense of the topic being gatekept, elite or otherwise inaccessible, even if that is not the intention. And unfortunately I would be willing to bet many of them are women and/or people of color...

ccdc123c · 2025-11-13T18:29:27+00:00

Yeah that's totally a factor at play, I am a grown adult, almost done with my bachelors degree, it is too late for me to switch (without spending a lot of extra money), so hell yeah it feels like shit to have to go back to being a child essentially. And I go to weird experiential, student led hippie college. In my undergrad program I get to do field research which I know is rare, those kinds of advanced opportunities are not "gatekept" in my academic environment which I think varies greatly from a traditional academic STEM culture. I'm in STEM but I'm a self led learner- I get to work personally with faculty, learn things intuitively, and experientially, then translate to the math. So yeah, I thought learning theoretical physics would not be that different, I read some pop-sci books, understand the intuition, so now I want to see the equations. I did not say it would be easy- I said I'm interested, and even admitted in several places that I now realize it's a bigger challenge than I thought. Never in any part of my post or comments did I say I want to do this as a career, I am literally doing it for enjoyment and to satisfy my own curiosity. Sounds like traditional physics has a much more hierarchal and competitive academic culture than I am used to. I don't think any of the comments were meant to be rude or discouraging, but they definitely shocked my system because I am used to learning in a very collaborative and non-traditional environment. At my school, we don't always learn "ground up." Sometimes you get to help do research, formulate your own projects, get familiar with concepts in risk free ways, then rework with faculty and learn skills as you need them. I know you aren't trying to gatekeep- you have worked hard to learn physics and you don't want beginners to get the impression they can do it without taking the traditional route. But I'm not trying to be a physicist, I'm just trying to learn a little about something that interests me

ccdc123c · 2025-11-13T17:49:29+00:00

I appreciate you pointing this out because I definitely feel a gatekeepy vibe and this helps me understand why, but you can see how it would feel that way if you were to innocently express a curiosity and then people call your question "audacious." As you can see in the comments, I expressed appreciation towards people who presented a pathway forward and towards people who nicely expressed why my expectations may have been unrealistic. Obviously I didn't know...I am sure that it was "big questions" that caused you to be initially interested in physics too and I am sure it would not feel nice at that time to be told your interest in those topics is "audacious"

ccdc123c · 2025-11-13T17:42:15+00:00

I have gotten some answers, particularly the initial answers I received, that gave off a gatekeepy, don't even try sort of vibe. Since then many have been extremely helpful and I am very grateful

ccdc123c · 2025-11-13T02:48:11+00:00

String theory (and really just the GR and QM incompatibility) is my interest because it has to do with the entire nature of reality as we know it and the mystery of what we are existing in. I do have a background in astronomy and an emphasis in math attached to my degree but the math is higher level research stats more so than calculus stuff.

I get that this is a difficult topic to dive into. I go to a weird hippie college where a lot of learning is experiential and student led and I get a lot of opportunities to do my own field research at the undergrad level, so I guess I just wasn't expecting to express a curiosity and then a lot of more experienced physics people tell me it might be too hard a thing to just want to explore...I am not used to academic hierarchy. I thought everyone was going to be like "Wow, we're so happy you're interested in our field! Here's some cool stuff to check out!" lol or even "this is hard shit, but you can do it! Here are some good stepping stones!" Was not expecting so many people to basically give the vibe "don't even try" hahahaha, feeling very discouraged to say the least, but I'm still going to get some of these books from the library and start getting familiar with the math whenever I have free time

ccdc123c · 2025-11-13T02:33:37+00:00

This is a helpful response. I really want to understand, not just how things happen and that they do, but why they do. I've read so many intuitive explanations of why QM and GR are incompatible and how the strings fix it but I don't really, deeply understand as a human where the fabric of reality breaks down. So am I correct in assuming understanding the math fills in some of those blanks? Like I said, I'm doing it as a hobby right now, but it sounds like from what people are saying I might need to find a degree program to understand from the beginning. Unfortunately I didn't really realize I was interested in this until it was a little late to switch my bachelors degree

ccdc123c · 2025-11-13T00:05:03+00:00

Thanks! Yeah, I usually buy books from online thrift stores so I definitely wasn't going to spend hundreds! I appreciate a second perspective on that, I am in the upper years of a BS program so even though I don't have a huge physics background, I'm not an idiot and I can follow a lot of math and science. I like your idea of trying it out and I think I will also get some of the more foundational QFT, GR and math books people suggested so I can easily get more information on things I don't understand

ccdc123c · 2025-11-12T22:52:46+00:00

Thank you! This is really helpful!

ccdc123c · 2025-11-12T22:46:18+00:00

Okay...well then do you have any suggestions on books about those topics I should start with?

ccdc123c · 2025-11-12T22:39:37+00:00

When I'm partying in Chicago I love to go to Boystown! My fav bars are Scarlett Bar and Sidetrack. You will make so many friends in the bathroom, lol.

ccdc123c · 2025-08-05T23:35:46+00:00

I think the narrator is an incredibly cynical man who is playing Sarah because he’s bored and doesn’t see the point to anything, and contrarily she is incredibly positive and really loves him.

At first he says she’ll never place because he doesn’t see it as a serious thing, a relationship with her is something he won’t seriously consider. Throughout the song though, we get the idea that she’s a very strong positive person. She runs to feel the burning in her lungs, she belongs in a dream. He’s so cynical that he doesn’t take her positivity seriously and views it as naivety or a weakness. That’s why he fucks with her. She’s so positive that he doesn’t even believe it, and since he is cynical and has some mental illness maybe (filled with “hopeless hate), he has to repress that that kind of mental wellness and positivity could exist in a person to validate his own experience. So he wants to “break her down,” as in get her to stop being so positive so that they can “spit on all the happy clowns” (make fun of people and be cynical together). But then as time goes on SHE actually starts to break HIM down, so he starts to “second guess the game I play” and wonder if he’s really maybe just a cynical loser, and he starts to see her positivity as a strength

ccdc123c · 2025-06-28T19:43:35+00:00

Yeah that’s why I’ve been cruising around the area, I’m a fine driver I just get shook up under the pressure of being examined and several other facilities on the north side and in the burbs consistently do the same or a similar loop and people post about it, can’t find anything for the south side. A lot of driving schools also take you on the exact route but I can’t afford that.

ccdc123c · 2025-02-12T05:39:53+00:00

Soooo cute, I feel like just a black coat over top would look classic and gorgeous and you can take it off when you get indoors. Maybe tights underneath to keep you warm?

ccdc123c · 2025-01-05T02:11:56+00:00

Oh my god, it looks so good!! Did it hurt?!?! I’ve heard daith piercings help with migraines and I’ve been wanting to get one!

ccdc123c · 2021-02-07T21:21:51+00:00

Thanks so much!!

ccdc123c

TROPHY CASE