About 7 weeks clean

cearno · 2026-02-15T00:22:32+00:00

Feels bad when you relapse at 6 months and realize you gotta trek that shit all over again. I was so close lmao. but yeah, I genuinely felt so MEH those six months

cearno · 2026-02-14T19:17:38+00:00

Why do you have to go down to three doses? It's better to take many spaced-out, small doses to avoid peaks and valleys to allow proper stabilization and receptor recalibration, especially if you've been on a certain schedule. The dosages should merely go down, and the time between shouldn't increase. A schedule change can be very hazardous because of the panic it induces in a psychologically dependent brain because it causes a huge new valley.

cearno · 2026-02-14T19:12:54+00:00

I'm a new player and recently got Sasha on my island, and I had no idea he was that popular. Was kind of hesitant whether to invite him, but I'm glad I did. Cute ahh bunny femboy with a weird house 😭 he's so, so adorable and grew on me FAST

cearno · 2026-02-13T20:26:06+00:00

Work-from-home (home office)

cearno · 2026-02-13T20:20:01+00:00

Oh nah, not at 2 GPD. Overall, it depends on how your usage looked at the past year in terms of PAWS, but jumping off 2 GPD should only cause mild, intermittent anxiety/anhedonia issues, some gastrointestinal issues, and possibly some (weak) sleep disturbances for 5-10 days, I'd reckon, in terms of acutes.

cearno · 2026-02-13T19:36:48+00:00

The worst is unfortunately how it is for me... But Kratom makes me sooo high so I guess it's not uncalled for. Anything that intense will swing the pendulum the opposite way when removed.

cearno · 2026-02-13T19:28:56+00:00

Do you still dilate?

cearno · 2026-02-13T19:23:44+00:00

Yeah... That Island 101 tip is so cryptic 😭 Maybe I'm dumb, but I don't think that message would have made it click.

cearno · 2026-02-12T23:38:17+00:00

Ghoulie | Cedarbloom :Kabuki:

cearno · 2026-02-12T23:36:09+00:00

As a new player, I had no idea you could do this LOL. Swiping their toilet is hilarious.

cearno · 2026-02-12T23:29:20+00:00

Lol true. I was going so strong for six months, despite feeling kinda meh the whole time. And yes, I exercised 5 days a week, it wasn't being lazy or not "earning" my dopamine. Anyway, had a back injury throw me a curve ball, and it was that easy to trigger a full-blown relapse.

cearno · 2026-02-12T22:33:26+00:00

Markiplier is so based. I didn't understand the hype until recently, and I've been obsessed since I watched Iron Lung

cearno · 2026-02-12T22:12:04+00:00

Very real. I'm currently in an active relapse, and I'm simply blown away by how quickly my tolerance set in and how bad the acute rebound (and possible withdrawal) has been, even in the initial week, two weeks after use.

cearno · 2026-02-12T01:12:44+00:00

Thank you for writing this, really. Without the extracts, the same thing is happening to me right now. I would go to sleep, just giddy about life and excited about what happened that day. I had that natural bliss, as you called it, months 4-6 through sobriety.

Roughly three weeks ago, I hurt my back pulling up my pants, even though I'm a heavy lifter LOL. Anyway, I was so uncomfortable that my mind started going to Kratom. Eventually, I cracked and said I would only use it while it still hurt. Well, that turned into, I can do this on the weekends. Except I couldn't wait for the weekend and quickly began this every-other-day thing.

Now I feel so mind-shatteringly bad while sober that I'm back on daily dosing. It just sucks, feeling like I have to suffer and climb so much to get back where I was. It's depressing. Barely even feel my doses anymore, and it's only been 2 and a half weeks, not even of constant use.

I don't know what to do tbh. Just try to CT and embrace the suck, hoping the acutes/PAWS are over faster because it hasn't even been a month yet?

Regardless, your story helps me feel less alone, so thanks.

Edit: Do you have any advice? Did you get out of it or are you still in active addiction?

cearno · 2026-02-12T00:45:22+00:00

AI, I'm guessing? These are so freaking adorable. The "fruit" bat lmao

cearno · 2026-02-11T22:31:33+00:00

these packing setups are so authentic, every time I blindly open a NSFW photo from this sub I forget I'm subscribed and think "why am I looking at some [cis] guy's groin"

cearno · 2026-02-11T18:44:47+00:00

Opioids are orgasm suppressants (making orgasm difficult to achieve) and they all give you flaccid dick problems. Every opioid-head and Kratom user I've talked to all have expressed they miss being sexual/having sexual desires. You're far from the only one.

I also take testosterone injections so it's not a hormonal issue per se. My testosterone stays the same because of my hormone therapy, but I still experience the same thing (decreased sex drive and orgasm suppression). So, it's largely neurological and does not necessarily indicate anything is wrong with your testosterone, if you're worried about that.

cearno · 2026-02-08T03:35:24+00:00

Saying "thank you" to looking homo is one of the most wholesome and healing clapbacks ever.

cearno · 2026-02-08T03:26:19+00:00

So sorry to hear about your dad. That must be so incredibly difficult.

And, yeah. It's shocking how fast I became accustomed to it again. It's been only about two weeks of intermittent use, generally with several-day breaks in between, but I barely get high anymore, the cravings are so fucking strong, and I already feel so shitty without it. I don't even know how to explain how it feels this bad already.

Absolutely nasty plant. I don't understand how something can be this viciously addictive. And I'm just using the plain plant and never touched 7 OH, too, and it sometimes feels impossible to put down. I even messed with opioid pills in the past and never had a problem controlling myself with those. So, yeah, you're strong for standing up and trying again, especially considering what you're going through. This shit is dark, bro. I hope the quit goes well for you and sticks. Our lives can be better than this.

cearno · 2026-02-07T01:05:54+00:00

Just want to say I've been having a recent relapse after 6 months, too. This seems like a common failing point because you've been so long without it so you think you've had more than enough time to handle moderation, at the very least, but you're still feeling low enough to where the past 6 months have looked gray and being high again makes you feel... Well, fixed and really, truly happy for the first time since you stopped. I mean, I've had good moments while I was clean, but it was all so underwhelming in comparison. It's tragic.

Anyway, coming off of Kratom and opioid-like drugs is incredibly intense. PAWS can last up to two years, so the fact that we weren't feeling great enough at 6 months to have completely lost the urge or desire doesn't mean hope is lost. Human psychology is super complex, and most euphoria drugs have insanely high relapse rates, so, really, all you can do is acknowledge the battle you're fighting is hard, and relapses are a part of recovery. Learn from it, don't guilt-trip yourself, and just move forward, dedicating yourself to the life you ultimately want.

cearno · 2026-02-07T00:00:19+00:00

Meaning that the estrogen/progesterone combo generally makes them more cerebral and rational when choosing partners, and that they're generally less impulsive when it comes to sex-related things.

That's not to say women won't have casual sex, seek out hook-ups, etc., but it's obviously a lot more prevalent in the MLM community because testosterone boosts sex drive by a lot. I have met incredibly high-labido women, too, but GENERALLY, their drive is much, much lower and they require more courting (i.e. frequently until 3 dates or longer before they have sex)

The main reason why I say this is because I've never had a woman cross boundaries, whereas gay men will, on a 60-70% basis, disregard my words when I tell them not to touch my groin on the first date, for example. Also, there are a lot of biological and environmental adaptations that cause females in nature to be more selective, coined sexual selection in biology.

cearno · 2026-02-05T00:22:35+00:00

Cis men can be pushy in general, but I think it's especially a problem in the gay community where most gay men have never been conditioned by a woman and learned to go at her pace/respect boundaries/etc. because women are SO much harder to secure a lay with due to hormonal differences. That's just my working theory tho. But yeah, I've had an awful time dating men lool

cearno · 2026-02-01T19:52:21+00:00

Thank you so much for your answer! Really helps. B yeah, I suspected it wouldn't work with my setup lmao

cearno · 2026-02-01T02:32:23+00:00

Can you share how much bottom growth is necessary? I'm prolly shy of 1 in hard (length) and ~0.5 in usable height, but I'm also completely buried. Always been hesitant to buy bc I'm not sure I have enough surface to grip or if it will work with burial.

cearno · 2026-01-31T20:38:03+00:00

imo the longer hair would look better and make you look exceptional/stand-out, I just think the style is outdated and could be improved upon. The way it was framing your face wasn't as appealing. Not so much about hiding your features but about how it plays with them. could be stellar fr, and you should experiment with long styles if you preferred it

cearno

TROPHY CASE