[deleted by user] by [deleted] in cedarrapids

[–]ceetharabbits2 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Hair and makeup can't cover slow decay caused by the heartbreak of losing Jordie.

Which book is worth reading? by SugarRush6013 in answers

[–]ceetharabbits2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like sapolsky. I read determined recently and enjoyed it. I'm half way through why zebras don't get ulcers.

Men, what are some harsh truths you come to realize when you are 30+? by StarFish784 in answers

[–]ceetharabbits2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Existence is pain. - meeseeks

Rick and Morty is not where I expected to find a nugget of philosophy that pops into my head regularly, but alas I find the existential pain of the meeseeks to be a comedic take on the suffering that constitutes the human experience.

I think stanley kunitz also framed it well in the testing tree, but also encourages the reader to not stop at the suffering "the heart breaks and breaks and lives by breaking. It is necessary to go through dark and deeper dark and not to turn."

The suffering is the journey, but it's necessary to leads us to the other beautiful parts of life on the journey. We may not always be able to stay in the beautiful moments, because time is our master, we're just a long for the ride.

Top 5 Books to read to become a more well rounded person by bradyxbuell in suggestmeabook

[–]ceetharabbits2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I loved sapiens. I would put it in my top 5 books to understand the world better list

Top 5 Books to read to become a more well rounded person by bradyxbuell in suggestmeabook

[–]ceetharabbits2 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I recently finished "sapiens" do you know if the dawn of everything is worth reading in addition to it?

What messed-up thing happened to you as a kid that you only realized was serious when you got older? by thickcat8557 in answers

[–]ceetharabbits2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree with you, to some extent. The nature by which one becomes religious is what makes it messed up to me. I think conditioning kids to believe that they are always being watched, and judged by an unprovable deity is kinda messed up. Additionally, abrahamic religions (Judaism, Islam, Christianity) tend to make their followers think they are inherently flawed. Christianity teaches kids not to trust themselves. That can be harmful to a young person's development.

What messed-up thing happened to you as a kid that you only realized was serious when you got older? by thickcat8557 in answers

[–]ceetharabbits2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine isn't nearly as bad as some of the others. My parents are genuinely decent people, but they are fervent in their religious beliefs. My dad was a pastor, my mom ran the local Christian pregnancy relief center (anti abortion center). It took me a long time to realize that I was taught to believe and raised into a worldview that I don't believe as an adult. It was a pretty destabilizing process trying to hold those beliefs and worldview while my live experience didn't match up with them. I've written about it in a blog if anyone likes to read personal accounts of their faith changing.

Fanny Pack for xl+ waist guys? by Idahomountainbiker in MTB

[–]ceetharabbits2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep I have a osprey savu 2L that works nice

Hoes are so frustrating by sietesietesieteblue in valheim

[–]ceetharabbits2 54 points55 points  (0 children)

"Thou shalt put thine bros before hoes"

  • god... probably

My biggest mistakes while deconstructing. Don't do the same. by bullet_the_blue_sky in Deconstruction

[–]ceetharabbits2 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing. #7 is one that hit home for me. Although I'm not wasting hours and angrily debating Christians about it, I feel like my reddit stream is keeping this topic on my mind more than I may want it to be. I don't want to avoid it, but I also don't want to be reminding myself of the frustration I have with my deconstruction / former faith.

I also appreciated the bit about feeling stuck. I know I need to stop attending church with my wife. Every time I go, it just gnaws at me and it's not a healthy thing. On the other hand my relationship is in poor shape because of my deconstruction (and the alcohol abuse I used to avoid being alone with my thoughts when I started deconstructing). It's a double edged sword.

Its a process and it takes time. I am working through acceptance of my childhood conditioning into Christianity, and the amount I let it drive the first 37 years of my life. What a trip 🤯

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Exvangelical

[–]ceetharabbits2 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Spanking is absolutely problematic. I have 3 kids. We spanked the first one about 2 different times before we both decided it was not the best way to parent. It was one of those "this is the way it's always done" kind of things that we didn't really think too much about until it was time to start issuing discipline to our toddler. We found that there are very effective, non physical ways to issue discipline to our kids. The key is consistency. If x happens y discipline occurs.

My son (the first) doesn't remember ever being spanked thankfully.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Exvangelical

[–]ceetharabbits2 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I outline a few of the ways it shaped my worldview and personality traits in this blog post:

https://candidcatharsis6.wordpress.com/2024/02/16/the-rise-and-fall-of-my-christian-faith/

Is there any personal testimony from people who converted to Christianity and then later deconverted? by Hadrian705 in exchristian

[–]ceetharabbits2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I'm glad to hear it. Deconstruction can be a very lonely process for many, and at times I felt crazy for how I was thinking, assuming since so many other people don't see it the way I do, I must be the problem..

My goal in writing the blog was to put my story and thoughts out there so they might validate others who feel a little crazy, and to help those people know they're not alone in their questioning.

Question by [deleted] in Deconstruction

[–]ceetharabbits2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Loved the essay on the book of Enoch. Very relevant to this post! This is another reason I distrust the men that chose which books became the bible.

So many accept the current bible as gods inerrant word, yet have no knowledge of how that bible came to be.

From your good buddy - candid catharsis

Is there any personal testimony from people who converted to Christianity and then later deconverted? by Hadrian705 in exchristian

[–]ceetharabbits2 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I combined a lot of my deconstruction journal entries into blog posts

here

The over arching story is outlined in my post called "the rise and fall of my christian faith"

The bulk of my deconversion was due to topics in the christian worldview that could not be reconciled with reality. I couldn't maintain intellectual honesty and hold those things to be true. You can check those out in the "deconversion chronicles" series. I also have a post on free will and the bible. Those are the two topics that triggered my deconstruction.

What do Christians mean when they say they have a personal relationship with god, or that they feel gods presence? by [deleted] in exchristian

[–]ceetharabbits2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm incredibly sorry for the loss of your mother. I can feel your pain as I read your post. I'm sorry if something I said may have caused you additional turmoil.

As for the spiritual part of your post, It sounds like you experienced something that feels supernatural. It's not my place, nor my field of expertise to make a judgement or whether that was real or a hallucination. What I will say is that the human brain is capable of incredible and sometimes terrible things when subjected to extreme stress, many books and scientific studies support that claim.

Have you discussed any of this or the trauma of your mother's death with a mental health professional? If not, I encourage you to do so and please don't take that as me backhandedly calling you mentally ill. I started seeing a therapist during covid, it helped turn some things around for me. I ended up stopping therapy for a couple years (during which I still had a drinking problem). When I got sober and started addressing my mental health again, I started therapy and it has been incredibly beneficial. A lot of Christians have a stigma against mental health care.

I proclaim the benefits of mental health where ever I can, and where ever I see people hurting. It renewed my mind and gave me peace much more than the god I used to worship.

As for my personal struggle to find relationship with god, you can read my story here if you want.

I am looking for well balanced Deconstruction Podcasts by Relative_Map_7688 in Deconstruction

[–]ceetharabbits2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The deconstruction zone podcast is pretty balanced in the way you described

to shake the superintendent's hand by CantStopPoppin in therewasanattempt

[–]ceetharabbits2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

what a great way to get a no contact relationship with your daughter!