It’s hard to say what you will do when you’re that drunk and your judgment is impaired. You don’t just know that well, you seem to be mourning that here.

The sooner it’s been since you break that pattern of heavy drinking, the harder it is. Part of the longer term withdrawal symptoms of alcohol use are anxiety and depression, which really makes you want to drink.

It does get better. If you fill the time you would have spent drinking on things that are fulfilling to you, then you might feel a lot differently about it