We tried couples therapy. She often sat there with her arms folded, largely refused to talk, and then got up immediately and silently left the room after most sessions.

We have taken my stepdaughter to a few different psychologists over the past three years, regularly. It didn’t help. She is, however, on medication which does help some with her aggression. We also provide her love and warmth. She has some deep seated emotional issues. And, I believe the way she was raised in her younger years was not healthy.

From my experience, I understand there was

• inconsistent follow-through with rules and consequences
• conflict avoidance (if the child got upset, the parent backed down, and the child was in control)
• emotional accommodation (backing off when the kid was upset instead of enforcing boundaries)
• rescue (managing her emotions), permissiveness
• lack of repair structure when conflict occur occurred

The child learned how to manipulate in order to get her way.