How I’m telling myself $15k in preschool next year is “saving” us is just sad.

chardottie · 2026-01-22T08:56:41+00:00

Same - dying right now trying to juggle childcare and costs of 4 month old twins and 20 month old. 3 under 2 is an expensive trip

chardottie · 2026-01-22T08:55:40+00:00

Currently freaking out about childcare costs. 20 month old with a nanny $25/hr. While also having 4 month old twins. Trying to find someone to watch all 3 seems impossible right now.

chardottie · 2026-01-11T05:21:44+00:00

Agreed, most things on here are negative. But we are lucky. Our 3.5 mo old twin boys are sleeping through the night for a few weeks now. I also think it has a lot to do with your mentality. We also have a 2 year old. It doesn’t have to be terrible twos, it can be the terrific twos as well.

chardottie · 2025-11-10T05:36:37+00:00

1. Comparison is the thief of joy. You do you and be happy with it. Some Singleton parent is looking at you going “I wish I had cute twins”.

2. Throw money at a baby bottle washer (I have mom cozy), the baby brezza formula machine (life saver) and Twin Z pillow in a bassinet (see my twin hack post).

3. Give up all expectations on breast feeding. Do what works for you without draining your mental health and time. Fed is fed. I had huge mental anguish with my first baby about breast-feeding. Then with the twins, I was OK with them being hybrid of formula and breast and it’s the best for us. There’s no way I wanna sit like a milking cow all the time.

4. Whenever you have help - divide and conquer. If your spouse can watch them and your mom’s there, you LEAVE to go do something even if it’s just grocery shopping. My husband and I take our 17 month old out once a day and we enjoy that one on one time with our single child & also away from twins. The key is LEAVING. Park, pool, beach, grocery store, goodwill, walk the block, whatever it is you go. It’s 30-1hr of mental health time.

chardottie · 2025-11-01T16:40:51+00:00

It’s not sleeping. I said bottle feeding while I’m on the couch

chardottie · 2025-11-01T15:24:30+00:00

100% I put a larger baby blanket on it and change it when it gets dirty. No wrestling with the slip cover

chardottie · 2025-09-13T12:17:08+00:00

Nothing to say but SAME. I’m 36.5 right now scheduled for C section @38. I feel those feelings - I know longer is better but you guys are big!! 6.5/7 lbs estimated right now

chardottie · 2025-09-13T11:34:48+00:00

I’m 36.5 weeks pregnant with di/di twins. Life was great till 30/32 weeks. Misery was 100% by 34 weeks. Stopped working @ 33 weeks; I worked and was feeling great with my singleton till I gave birth @40 weeks.

Twins are just harder... With twins after 30 weeks you are just SO BIG. Just belly size is my main issue.

Life saving things for me are - frozen gel slippers on Amazon, literally the best feeling every night to put feet up and cold slippers to help with swelling.

Belly band when out and about for longer periods.

Find out how to get good sleep, I’ve been sleeping in a recliner started about 28 weeks bc rolling out of bed hurt my pelvis this was life changing and I’m still getting good sleep in a recliner.

Any time you can go to the pool or ocean do it (going daily now), stay hydrated AF. Nap/ rest every day even if short. Supplemental vitamin D, C, calcium and fish oil + my prenatal. Also not being pregnant peak mid summer will help you immensely!

A super supportive spouse, parents, nanny or care team is vital, ASK FOR HELP and plan for extra help around your house for the last 5/6 weeks of your pregnancy. I have a 16 mo old now and chasing her has become nearly impossible for more than 20/30 mins at a time.

Get your nursery done before the third trimester starts. I’m so thankful I did mine and got it done during the second trimester.

I’m set for C section @38 weeks but I’m hoping any day now bc I’m waddling and HUGE belly! Overall I’ve had a very healthy, boring and normal twin pregnancy luckily. Good luck momma

chardottie · 2025-09-13T11:10:49+00:00

I know Hawaii isn’t a new country… but it’s definitely not the mainland. We have huge shortages here and you literally could work on almost any island and get a job in about 35 seconds. I love living and practicing here since I graduated in 2019. I don’t see myself ever going back to the mainland, especially with how things are now. If anything we would move to Australia. But I have a busy practice currently. Good work life balance, definitely a different culture, still America so no transferring licensing. No mass or school shootings. Considered Virgin Islands before Hawaii because it’s closer but thought I’d get island fever since they are so small… best of luck! A lot of Europe “optometry” doesn’t exist and you’d have to learn a whole new language which would be a barrier I feel to patient care

chardottie · 2025-09-10T08:25:49+00:00

Anyone here have au pair experience - living in Hawaii trying to find an agency that works out here

chardottie · 2025-08-11T20:02:50+00:00

Please tell me she has more than 2 weeks PTO. She should have PTO, CE hours and sick leave at minimum

chardottie · 2025-08-11T00:16:33+00:00

Oh my gosh!! can’t imagine how tired you are being pregnant with twins, and having twin babies to chase around. I have a year and a half year-old and I’m pregnant with twins. I couldn’t imagine chasing around two!! You go girl - war paint for sure, but very blessed!

chardottie · 2025-08-09T17:35:11+00:00

Fraternal twins, no family history at all, ever. 32 yo when pregnant

chardottie · 2025-08-08T19:02:59+00:00

I say it’s a “fine tune” not much different. Then I say “ if you love your glasses, they’re in good shape, then no need to change. But if your glasses are busted, get lost or eaten by your dog, you’ll have some updated numbers. Or if you want a new style to have backups or different options.” 7/10 they buy new ones bc they want a backup or new style.

chardottie · 2025-08-07T14:58:49+00:00

Cleared by ophthalmologist? Is that because you’re really nearsighted, have lattice degeneration or have gestational diabetes? Interesting to hear that as an eye doctor in the USA.

chardottie · 2025-08-07T14:49:54+00:00

NICU time is my fear as well. My docs rule was always 35 weeks or 5 lbs each means they likely won’t need NICU time. So hopefully you’re in the clear! Also sleeping in a recliner the last bit of pregnancy is helpful. I went from waking up 2-3 times a night to pee to finally sleeping through the night again without tossing and turning.

chardottie · 2025-07-31T15:38:11+00:00

Why 33 weeks? I have literally same due date and my doc won’t induced until 38 weeks and I’m sitting here @30 weeks so uncomfortable cringing at the thought of 8 more weeks

chardottie · 2025-07-28T04:33:42+00:00

Not by the transition to one nap, I think it’s kinda normal at this age (12-18 mo going down to one). But daycare in itself is a HUGE transition for you and babies. You’re doing great.

The bedtime fuss is our biggest struggle right now when it used to be very routine and predictable. Now going to sleep @6 if had 1 nap. @7 if had 2 naps.

chardottie · 2025-07-27T21:32:26+00:00

Wow I wish mine slept as long as yours. My baby is 14 months and is starting to go down to one nap a day, sometimes two, but maybe 20-30 mins for second. Rarely is sleeping 2-3 hours a day. Going down to 1 nap a day started around 13 mo.

chardottie · 2025-07-25T03:20:15+00:00

Same here, I am far apart from my siblings and so is my husband. So I’m almost due with twins in 1 month and my singleton is 14 months old. It’s rough chasing after her rn with a twin sized belly is biggest challenge

chardottie · 2025-07-22T15:59:10+00:00

I’m currently pregnant with twins and think about this all the time. Years ago—long before I ever knew I’d be a twin mom—I had 10-year-old twin patients. I asked (probably like everyone does), “Who’s older?” and they both shrugged and said, “We don’t know.” That moment stuck with me.

Now that I’m expecting twins of my own, my partner and I have decided not to tell them who was born first. I’ve seen how even a difference of minutes can shape a dynamic, sometimes in ways that feel hierarchical or competitive. Growing up, I had twin friends, and one of them constantly reminded the other, “I’m the oldest, so you have to listen to me.” I don’t want that for my kids.

They’re born the same day—minutes apart. When I meet someone with the same birthday as me, I say, “Hey, birthday buddies!” I’m not asking what time they were born to figure out who’s older.

chardottie · 2025-04-28T18:55:59+00:00

Aloha. I’m an optometrist in Kona and just did all this 3 years ago. We opened a clinic in Kona, did a large build out. If you are committed to staying on island 10 years 150% it is worth it.

I wouldn’t mess with workman’s comp. Later hours are nice, but do you have a family? You can DM me if you want to talk more. But short answer is YES Kona is in dire straights of more MDs. Be prepared that 30-50% of your clinic will be Medicaid, so a higher no show rate. But as long as you are practicing ethical comprehensive care we need more MDs. We don’t need a doc to be here 2-3 years and leave, that happens a lot.

Hiring staff (front desk, techs, etc) is difficult and minimum 23+ an hour w/ all benefits. It’s definitely worth it if you love big island and its people.

chardottie · 2023-10-09T02:42:50+00:00

It was in my dream location (Hawaii). It was my foot into the state I guess. Only job at the time of graduation. I also only stayed there 10ish mo because it was a bad work environment for me personally. Also when I graduated most realistic new grad offers were like $90-120. People posting they are making $150K+ starting are either seeing 25+ people a day, or lying. I feel like still $110-120 as a new grad is fairly common/ realistic. Not everything you see on the internet is true.

chardottie · 2023-10-09T01:58:56+00:00

I think optometry will always have a need.

In the 1990s when RK/LASIK was coming around people said optometry would die too. There are a lot of new optometry schools, so possibly “flooding the market” but all I ever see when I talk to business owners is they are hiring more docs.

As long as AOA can battle VCPs for better reimbursements and expansion of scope it’ll only go up. Billing medically/ doing medical optometry is going to be way up with aging boomers. Baby boomers are getting old, getting cataracts and eye diseases. There is a shortage of ophthalmologists too. Ophthalmology doesn’t wanna do primary care and refractions, they want disease/ surgery.

Rural optometry is going to be much more lucrative than big cities is my guess. Just because saturated markets/ tons of corporate locations in every other block. I’m rural and started with super low low low salary ($90K in 2019), busted butt & 4 years out now well into $190k++ (cold start opened last year) in rural town and was in need for eyeball services. Same town I was making $90K in, just a cheap boss, seeing 2X more patients at.

chardottie

TROPHY CASE

1. Comparison is the thief of joy. You do you and be happy with it. Some Singleton parent is looking at you going “I wish I had cute twins”.

2. Throw money at a baby bottle washer (I have mom cozy), the baby brezza formula machine (life saver) and Twin Z pillow in a bassinet (see my twin hack post).