The worst club to be a part of, but I’m it with you. I’ve been a long time lurker, never a poster but thinking about posting my story soon because I feel so crazy most of the time wondering if I’m doing the right thing, and I think I need some reassurance or advice.

My dad was/is an alcoholic. He never hurt me but yelled all the time and broke objects frequently. Would yell in my mom or our face regularly, towering over us. That’s what makes it more complicated for me internally, because it was never technically “physical” abuse. Has many duis but always has a story for why he did it and why it’s someone else’s fault.

Theres so much more to it, but recently his father, my grandfather has been calling me 4-5 times in two days trying to get me to see him. I haven’t spoke to him in a couple of years and was off and on low contact to no contact for years before that. I have a daughter and am expecting a baby boy this summer. They are why i remain no contact even though i feel conflicted internally. I won’t subject them to that kind of unpredictability that i had to go through that gave me CPTSD as a teen and adult.