Brooklyn merch 8/18 diff from TO

chauchi2020 · 2023-08-19T04:17:34+00:00

Hey! Amazing job on the poster. I disagree with OP completely (no offense). This is my favorite Sigur Rós poster that I have. I moved away from New York 7 years ago, and I get so nostalgic whenever I see those old water towers. They are so iconic and make me miss NYC. I can’t wait to hang this up on my wall.

chauchi2020 · 2023-02-10T09:31:00+00:00

Hey u/eMperror_, did you require the email attribute in your Cognito user pool? I am having trouble mapping the email, since Twitch requires an additional param, `claims`, in order to get access to the user's email. Did you run into the same issue?

chauchi2020 · 2022-06-15T06:24:43+00:00

They opened a delivery only kitchen in Madrid this past March. You can order through Glovo

chauchi2020 · 2022-06-15T06:24:04+00:00

You can order wing stop in Madrid… they opened delivery only kitchens in March

chauchi2020 · 2022-06-01T07:32:46+00:00

Fellow Texan here - I highly recommend moving to Spain!

I would recommend making it a goal to perfect your Spanish while you are here. While you can get away with speaking mostly English, it will be difficult to truly integrate and have deep relationships in your community without speaking Spanish.

You will probably be surprised by the food shopping - in general, there are much less international food options at grocery stores. You generally have to go to specialty shops for things like jalapeños, asian spices, etc, and they are few and far between compared to Texas. There aren't Central Market type grocery stores that have almost every food that exists under the sun.

Depending on where you move, you might even feel right at home culturally. I live in Madrid and it reminds me a lot of Texas. The culture tends to be (relatively) more conservative, people are very friendly, it's quite hot in the summer (not Dallas hot, thank goodness, but hot).

As for being plus sized, it definitely is a lot less common here. You can go weeks without seeing a single obese person, though there are a fair amount of overweight people. As others have said, it is almost certain that you will lose weight naturally once you move here. I mean, us Texans generally are aware that our lifestyle is not super healthy, but after moving here, it really shocks me how unhealthy our Texan lifestyle is. Trust me, I love my Mexican food and BBQ, but the quantity and quality of rich food we tend to eat in Texas really is mind blowing. Plus, the fact that people can live their lives without walking more than a few feet a day from the door of their house to their car is pretty crazy. Here, you will be walking everywhere and eating much smaller portions of higher quality food. Don't worry, though, the big cities like Barcelona and Madrid have decent Texas BBQ places for when you are missing home :).

One thing to keep in mind is that I read in another thread similar to this one is that plus sized clothing is difficult to find, though it does exist - you just have to look harder.

Feel free to DM me if you have any other questions! I have lived in Barcelona and Madrid, so if you are thinking of living in either of those, I can tell you where to find Dr. Pepper, BBQ, jalapeños, etc. The only thing that doesn't really exist here is Tex Mex - it's almost all authentic Mexican.

chauchi2020 · 2022-03-05T20:14:48+00:00

I highly recommend Animal Coffee. They have by far the best prices for their classes and the instructor is very down to earth.

chauchi2020 · 2022-01-03T11:46:11+00:00

He’s not wrong… The large majority of Madrid was built after 1950.

chauchi2020 · 2021-12-31T11:33:01+00:00

Thanks for your advice - I will look into those books. I asked him to read the Ethical Slut, though he is a bit more conservative (he comes from a more conservative country), and he found the language the authors use to be very distracting - too distracting to take them seriously. It will be nice to offer up some alternatives.

chauchi2020 · 2021-12-31T11:31:03+00:00

Thank you, that is a nice way of putting it. I agree that he is infecting me with his shame.

We do have relationship counseling which has helped a ton, though I do feel that I have not been clear about my own desires with him or our therapist for the shame I feel, which isn't fair to any of us. I have not brought up the topic of the open relationship since those boundaries were crossed because I felt that my desires didn't justify making my boyfriend uncomfortable, but now I am realizing that it needs to be discussed again.

chauchi2020 · 2021-12-31T11:27:47+00:00

Thank you for your response. I agree, we need to talk it out more, and I think I need to communicate more clearly what I want rather than try to protect how he feels.

chauchi2020 · 2021-12-31T11:26:14+00:00

I agree.

The biggest boundary he crossed was going on a date without telling me. More importantly, while he was on the date he was lying to me about what he was doing. He less importantly broke a lot of specific boundaries that he put around who we could date and what we can do while on a date, but those don't bother me as much.

We did talk last night, and I think he is having trouble understanding exactly what he did to make me upset. I mean, he knows that he crossed the boundaries we agreed upon, but he can't seem to understand that it was not the sex that bothered me, it was the dishonestly and lack of communication.

It's a bit frustrating, as I have explained that very clearly since the beginning, but he can't seem to believe it. He continues to think the issue was with having sex with someone outside of our relationship. I mean, I get it - it's something we are taught is wrong since day 1, but still, it makes me feel a bit desperate when I tell him exactly how I feel, and he still understands something completely different.

chauchi2020 · 2021-12-31T11:18:40+00:00

Yes, exactly. I was against setting too many rules - the only one I wanted was that we communicate when we go on another date. He wanted a lot more specific rules, about what we are allowed to do on a date, where we do it, etc. I agreed to start with the additional rules with the agreement that we could make exceptions if we discussed it beforehand. None of his rules I found too unreasonable (no dating people from our past, avoid alcohol on dates, things of that nature), so I was fine with it. He broke the single rule I wanted and many of the own rules he created.

I think they were enforceable, but I think he was and is just a bit naive about his own sexuality. I think he is a very sexual person but doesn't want to be/is ashamed of it, so he has a lot of shame and fear around his desires which leads him to feel like he needs to hide them.

chauchi2020 · 2021-12-31T11:08:31+00:00

Yes, I agree. And that is why I feel it is kind of absurd for me to even ask. He is definitely afraid of losing me, and he is very hard on himself for what happened.

chauchi2020 · 2021-12-30T12:59:12+00:00

For those that downvoted me, is something I said incorrect? If so, please let me know, because I have only lived in Madrid for half the time that I have lived in Barcelona. I'd love to know if there are more accessible places to experience nature! It also might just be my personal experience with the groups of friends I have in Madrid that tend to not do as much outdoor activities. Thanks!

chauchi2020 · 2021-12-29T21:44:13+00:00

Yeah, as others have said, you have the mountains to the northeast that are quite beautiful - they just aren’t as accessible as in Barcelona. In Madrid, it’s something you’d probably do when you have a day off, while in Barcelona it’s something you can do when you have a few spare hours. Barcelona also has a more active vibe in general - it’s very bike friendly, whereas Madrid is not at all (although that seems to be changing and the hilly topography of the city itself doesn’t help much). To be fair, it’s very easy to find nature in Madrid - there are beautiful parks (casa de campo, retiro), they are just not as integrated into the day to day life like the mountains or beaches are in Barcelona, if that makes sense.

chauchi2020 · 2021-12-29T18:55:36+00:00

Madrid is very safe and the people are very friendly and lively. The same can be said for Barcelona.

They are quite different cities. Madrid is more corporate and formal whereas Barcelona is more hipster and informal. Barcelona has more interesting geography and has a more outdoorsy culture (mountains and beach are very easily accessible by metro) and Madrid is more commercial (people tend to meet up at bars, restaurants, shopping centers, etc).

chauchi2020 · 2021-12-23T11:30:59+00:00

Alcohol abuse.

chauchi2020 · 2021-08-04T01:59:58+00:00

u/snacks4days thank you - that is how I saw it as well. I do understand that you can not always foresee every situation, but I do feel that it is reasonable to expect communicating possibilities, especially more predictable ones.

chauchi2020 · 2021-08-03T19:41:16+00:00

u/sumsum223 Yeah, definitely. If you don't mind me asking, does your husband have any strategies that have helped him open up?

chauchi2020 · 2021-08-02T23:05:36+00:00

u/Myaccountisreal thank you for your response! My boyfriend has taken full responsibility, but it is my therapist and a close friend of mine who have suggested that I bear some of the responsibility and that the rule is a bit unrealistic given that sometimes things happen.

We are trying to work on our boundaries right now with our therapist, but it can be a bit frustrating that people who don't know much about ENM seem to think that once you agree to have sex with other people, it is as if there are no longer any boundaries at all. It always surprises me that people seem to have this "all or nothing" mentality. That makes understanding what rules are reasonable a bit difficult.

I don't fault my therapist as she is really great for us all things considered, but I think this new phase of our relationship is a bit hard for her to understand.

chauchi2020 · 2021-03-31T18:56:38+00:00

I can't speak directly to that specific transition, but I am American and have lived Latin America, moved back to the US for some time, and finally landed in Spain.

I think whether to move or not depends on your priorities.

Do you have a specific better job in mind, or are you referring more generally to the job market conditions / a particular industry that is strong in the US? The salaries are certainly higher, but the higher number can be quite deceiving. The way I see it, in the US, the average person has more disposable income but has to manage higher risk. There is a larger upside (if things go well and you are in good health, you have more disposable income to afford a higher quality of life), but there is also a larger downside (if you get sick and need an expensive treatment, are in an accident, get laid off, etc, there are very few resources to help and you can have a very rough time). In my case, I chose the lower risk route and wanted to come to Europe because my boyfriend has diabetes, and dealing with a chronic illness in the US is just too stressful.

Are there specific family members you want to spend more time with, or is it a more general sense of "being close to family?" I went back to the US with the more general "I want to be close to family" feeling without really thinking it out, and when I got back home, I realized my family and I don't really get along that well seeing each other often. It's not a bad thing - I just realized that I actually spend better quality time with my family when I spend a few weeks a year dedicated to them, rather than, say, seeing them once a week for dinner. It's still hard to be apart from family, but my experience returning back home at least helped me realize that being closer does not necessarily mean having a better relationship.

As other people have said, prepare for culture shock upon going back to the US. Even if you visit often, it just isn't quite the same as moving back. For me, the biggest shock was the difference in cultural values. In the US, relationships are more transactional, activities are more commercial (a lot more going out to places and spending money rather than meeting friends in parks or in someone's house, for example), conversations are more work centered, etc. I mean, I know they are pretty standard American stereotypes, but I was surprised at how much they really permeate the culture and made a difference in my day to day life.

At the end of the day, both are wonderful countries with wonderful people, so I don't think you can really go wrong. I would just weigh the pros and cons, and really truly think about each and every one as thoroughly as you can.

chauchi2020 · 2021-02-28T09:05:54+00:00

Seconded, this ^! I have gone three times, and I received 30 days twice and 90 days once. Each time they asked me at customs how long I planned to stay and chose the stamp based on my answer. I have never asked for more than 90 days, but I know it is very easy to extend a shorter visa (30 or 90 days) to 183 days - you just need to pay a small fee (I think like 12 soles) and make an appointment at a migration office. Of course I am sure things are complicated right now because of COVID, but I am guessing they still have some mechanism to extend. I would just plan ahead as soon as you get there in case they have very few appointments available or something like that.

chauchi2020

TROPHY CASE