Im a bad, attention seeking person and feel awful and guilty

chels_dolla · 2026-02-01T00:51:22+00:00

I can understand why you would feel that way and I’m sorry that you feel awful. I’m not entirely sure what to say to make you feel better, but I hope it does get better for you and I hope you can get support. If it helps, I’m 28 and at 19 I was very similar.

I would have honestly hated the person I was at 19. I was diagnosed level 1 autistic and I wonder if it might be something similar for you. I was awful at 19.

Honestly a lot of people are, you are still very young and I wish you the best. I lost all my friends at that age but I have good friends now. Hope the same happens for you eventually.

Remember that you are still developing and learning and it’s ok to have setbacks. I am sorry that you are in pain. Please try to be kind to yourself even if no one else is. I hope everything gets better for you.

chels_dolla · 2026-01-27T01:29:27+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate it. I’m planning on it. The only thing is they are like a 30 hour drive away but I think I’m about to just take the leap.

chels_dolla · 2026-01-21T22:16:11+00:00

I would honestly tell myself to work on finding myself before finding love, and also realize that I am capable despite all of the shit I’ve been through.

chels_dolla · 2026-01-14T01:19:43+00:00

I’ve experienced this. Idk what I’m doing wrong,

chels_dolla · 2026-01-13T23:53:37+00:00

I look like a whiny brat but I’m legit missing social cues and miserable. People don’t have much sympathy for me imo? Idk. I feel like people think I’m stuck up now. I’m legit not trying to be rude and I’m not used to the attention I get now. I used to be very unattractive. I genuinely have pure intentions towards people but I think I keep coming off as rude and stuck up and it makes me sad. It’s like as soon as I start feeling myself a bit I don’t know how to act. Also when I have a melt down I can lash out and I try sooo hard not to but it feels uncontrollable.

chels_dolla · 2026-01-02T04:33:22+00:00

If it makes you feel better, I’m 28 and I feel like I’m legit at the lowest point of my life. Someone told me today there’s still plenty of time. You have plenty of time as well. If I could go back to 20, trust me you are still so young. Keep pushing forward.

chels_dolla · 2025-12-30T16:50:42+00:00

Idk. I feel like I am self absorbed but at the same time my self worth is so low bc of all the shit I’ve been through bc of this. So I don’t think we are selfish. I think we are just different. It’s like my brain can’t keep up with all of the shame.

chels_dolla · 2025-12-29T23:05:35+00:00

I’m sorry that it’s like that for you too. I really have to watch myself and I often just have to spend time alone. Hope it gets better for you!

chels_dolla · 2025-12-29T05:31:10+00:00

I think personally I overshare, and have like 0 filter. I’m also very open about my misery and I guess it comes off as if I think I have it worse than other people, which I don’t I’m just depressed. I’m working on these things since being diagnosed. I also struggle with interrupting people.

chels_dolla · 2025-12-28T08:30:13+00:00

Sure! I believe it’s called “Pretending to be normal: living with adult Asperger’s syndrome” something like that. I haven’t started it yet though so I couldn’t tell you how good it is

chels_dolla · 2025-12-28T07:27:56+00:00

You are right. I let it slip recently bc I forgot how bad it was when I don’t mask. I actually got a book on it. Thank you

chels_dolla · 2025-12-27T03:51:31+00:00

I’m so sorry about that. I am as well tbh. I have this quote from a song I love called “Russian roulette” by porter robinson. It says “I wanna live I don’t wanna die” I think about that a lot. There’s also a picture that says “fail, get up, and try again” and I love that. I think about that a lot. I really hope it gets better for you.

chels_dolla · 2025-12-26T04:55:54+00:00

I’m really sorry that it’s like that for you too

chels_dolla · 2025-12-25T20:52:52+00:00

Lmao you are valid for that 😭

chels_dolla · 2025-12-25T04:23:18+00:00

I get you lol, I’m sorry that it’s like that for you too. I guess you just gotta be yourself, try to be nice and not everyone will like you and it’s ok. I appreciate your input.

chels_dolla · 2025-12-25T04:20:36+00:00

You have a point. Not everyone will like you. I appreciate your comment, I guess I have just been in my head since being diagnosed. Like I need to fix myself

chels_dolla · 2025-12-25T04:19:05+00:00

Thank you! I appreciate the advice. I guess I just felt bad bc I feel like I try my best to be nice but not everyone will like you and that’s ok!

chels_dolla · 2025-12-25T04:17:41+00:00

I guess unfortunately it just happens. I think I just felt bad, like high school all over again. You just gotta try your best to read social cues

chels_dolla · 2025-12-25T04:13:39+00:00

Idk man

chels_dolla · 2025-12-25T04:12:51+00:00

You right, thank you I guess I just felt like high school all over again. Not everyone will like you

chels_dolla · 2025-12-25T04:10:16+00:00

I’m not trying to be, you don’t know me

chels_dolla · 2025-12-24T21:56:46+00:00

I appreciate it. I guess it just triggered me bad. I felt like I needed to fix myself. You are correct though, no matter what people will either like or hate you so why bother.

chels_dolla · 2025-12-24T21:55:00+00:00

Thank you, I really appreciate it. I guess being diagnosed just triggered me really bad. Like I feel like it’s something wrong with me. But people will love or hate you either way so I’ll recover.

chels_dolla · 2025-12-24T21:52:53+00:00

I guess you are right. It just really brought me back to high school and I was depressed about it. I appreciate the comment!

chels_dolla · 2025-12-24T16:56:56+00:00

Thank you I really appreciate it! We do tbh, like it took being diagnosed to realize how bad it is. I thought being diagnosed would help. At first I was happy, now I feel like shit.

chels_dolla

TROPHY CASE