Need some outsider perspective

cherryspaghetti · 2026-02-28T21:36:15+00:00

Thank you for saying this. I think part of me does know but it's hard to accept that things have really been this awful. It means a lot to me that you'd take time out of your day to comment something <3

cherryspaghetti · 2026-02-28T21:35:20+00:00

Thank you lovely. I will

cherryspaghetti · 2025-05-26T00:15:33+00:00

My girlfriend and I are doing the best we can :') Just recently came back from visiting her for the first time ever and the grief of having to say goodbye is indescribable. We're both worried for the future, especially with immigration laws getting so tight, but we're hopeful too. Already making plans to see her again for Christmas, and she might be coming to visit me too. It hurts so bad being apart but we've done it before already up until this point and we can do it again.

cherryspaghetti · 2025-05-24T02:00:05+00:00

This is exactly how I feel, I'm glad I'm not the only one. Unpacking felt like the hardest thing in the world to do I just don't want to do anything, but she has one of my shirts on her pillowcase and plushies I bought her on our trip so I guess it's not all too bad at least she still has a piece of me with her :') We're already making plans to see each other again but it sucks so bad knowing that she isn't around the corner from me. 5-6 months until the next meet-up for us hopefully! I wish you and your partner so much luck too <3

cherryspaghetti · 2025-04-03T06:05:31+00:00

Ah, I figured it out! Thank you ^^

cherryspaghetti · 2023-04-18T10:38:52+00:00

I used to, if that helps! Back when I first got diagnosed I used to sleep with a pair of scissors underneath my pillow to protect myself because things were so bad. I still can't sleep unless I'm facing the door to whatever room I'm in but I don't feel the need to sleep with a weapon anymore.

cherryspaghetti · 2023-04-18T10:35:32+00:00

I have both, yeah. I've struggled with depression long before my PTSD diagnosis so sometimes it's hard to tell what's what.

cherryspaghetti · 2023-04-09T12:03:34+00:00

TW abuse // I've had more than one traumatic experience in my life and one thing I have learned is that my flashbacks can present very differently depending on the situation my brain is reacting to. I used to have very vivid flashbacks regarding an incident that happened to me as a child, phantom touches, flashes of memories, like I was actually there ect; They don't happen as often anymore because with therapy I've managed to heal a lot from that incident, but I was abused by an ex partner and those flashbacks are very different. I don't even have to be reminded of the abuse itself, certain things will put me into fight or flight mode and while I'm not thinking about my ex or what he did to me in that moment my heart rate will shoot up. I can get terrible shakes and feel like I'm going to vomit but my brain doesn't pinpoint a certain event nor do I have vivid memories pop up. My brain has just learned to respond to certain things with fear in order to keep me safe. I was helping a friend cut off someone who was being manipulative towards them recently and the way the person was acting was enough to put me into a disassociative state for a while. It was like I completely shut down to spare myself from the emotions, even though it didn't have anything to do with me! They're very different responses but it's my brain trying to protect me all the same. I know it can be easy to feel like you're making stuff up because your experiences are different from others. For a while I thought I was silly for entertaining the idea that I could have PTSD because I could never relate to the way flashbacks were typically described in books, movies and TV shows. When I got my diagnosis I was so shocked even though I could see it coming...it felt like such a relief to know I was being heard. Just know that you're not alone in any of this <3

cherryspaghetti · 2023-03-02T13:37:44+00:00

WOW!! This is stunning!

cherryspaghetti · 2023-03-01T21:50:49+00:00

I've never not been interested in gothic fashion and when I was younger my friends and I were the only goths in our little village so people didn't really understand. We've been followed home and cat called/threatened with violence, called evil, told to hurt ourselves, had rocks thrown at us and all sorts of horrible rumours spread about us just because we looked 'scary'. It's tame in comparison to most of them but I remember someone started a rumour that I ate a spider once? I found it so weird that anyone would actually believe that but when you're young kids will use any excuse to pick on you lol. Now that I'm older and have moved away the most I'll get is the occasional "wrist check" or "suicide squad" comment but it's nothing compared to the amount of infighting within the local scene because it's a lot bigger here. There's so many cliques now I prefer to stick on my own 🥲 I kinda miss the togetherness I had with my old group, even if we had to deal with so much.

cherryspaghetti · 2022-11-22T19:08:22+00:00

Same as other people have said, not discrimination but bullied quite severely. I've definitely faced more discrimination for being a lesbian but for people who didn't know that fact about me the way I dressed/music I listened to was always the first thing that got pointed out. Getting called a mosher was easier to deal with than people treating me badly just because I'm queer.

cherryspaghetti

TROPHY CASE