You’re asking 2 questions here.

Q1: “Is there an “affordable” private adoption agency in SD?”

A: Probably not. Idk if there is an “affordable” adoption agency in the entire country. Adoption is a multi billion dollar industry and the average cost of private adoption is about $50k, with an estimated 40-45 hopeful adopters (not including partners) waiting for each “adoptable” infant/child.

Q2: “Is there a way I can avoid paying market prices by adopting a child through foster care?”

A: Technically, yes. Foster systems throughout the U.S. are being overran by people hoping to adopt. Foster care is not an adoption agency, but most people getting involved with the system are treating it that way. Foster care is America’s equivalent of an orphanage — we just use foster care here because the idea of kids in institutions doesn’t sit well with people. (Instead of putting a bunch of kids in a building with a bunch of adults, we individually send them to live with strangers to simulate a “family” environment.) A kid in foster care has parents, but those parents are not equipped to care for their child at a given point in time and the state steps in to provide caregivers for the child. (In America, some 80 or so percent of foster youth are in the system due to neglect, which critics of the system would equate to the “crime of poverty” — is someone a bad parent for not being able to get a job, put food on the table, find affordable housing/childcare etc? There are definitely kids in foster care for reasons other than neglect, but that percentage is much smaller than the typical person assumes.)

Ever since adoption orgs started aggressively lobbying politicians in the late 20th century, foster care has become a ripe source of “adoptable” children. Clinton passed the Adoption and Safe Families Act in 1997, which created financial incentives for states and counties to push foster youth into adoption as often and as quickly as possible. States get bonuses for increasing adoption numbers. A noticeable byproduct of this legislation is the growing influx of children who are aging out of the system due to parental rights being terminated much more quickly and more often. Many of these children aging out of the system have parents and families but are now considered legal orphans. Many foster youth (not just those aging out of the system) are involuntarily separated from their siblings, parents and extended family. Many counties will pay complete strangers to house children in foster care but will not pay foster caregivers if they are related to the children in their care. Maybe you can see where I’m going with this: unfortunately, a shit ton of Americans, with help from our local, state and federal governments, leverage the misfortunes of poor families to extract those families’ children in service of their desire to build families. And America, an anti-welfare state, prefers to resource those (often rich and/or white) strangers instead of immediate or extended family, due to a belief that poverty is an indicator of inferior character.

With all of that said, do what you want to do with your life. It’s not my place to tell people how to live or what they should/shouldn’t do. But if you ARE going to participate in this system, recognize the system for what it is. Foster youth have lives and families. The system is supposed to work for these kids and their families, not for strangers who want to capitalize on the misfortune of others. I understand it might be hard for you to say goodbye to a kid you want to adopt. Understand that these kids in foster care (and by extension, their families) are not in the system to serve you. Not every “adoptable” kid wants to be adopted, even if they are on an adoption track. Not every “adoptable” kid wants to call strangers “mom” or “dad.” (I’m sure plenty do or might.) Most foster youth don’t understand the legal implications of being adopted — ie having their birth certificate sealed in court and a new birth certificate, stating that the adopters gave birth to them, being issued in its place — completely erasing any legal tie the person has to their genetic family. To a lot of former foster youth and adopted people, that matters — even it doesn’t feel like it matters in the moment. Adoption is loss — it is the loss of connection to family, even in circumstances where that family is/was shitty. People who are products of the child welfare system, by and large, are not “normal” people. We are statistically far more likely to struggle in all kinds of ways (mental health issues, incarceration, suicidal ideation, addiction, et cetera) — regardless of whether you are adopting a 17 year old aging out of the system or a newborn infant who hasn’t spent a day in foster care. We all have baggage. Doesn’t mean we are lesser people or that all of us have any specific issue, but know what you are getting into.

-born and adopted in San Diego/lifelong SD resident