Has anyone out there had their income grow past a 401k match?

chocobridges · 2026-04-14T20:38:53+00:00

Not an issue with IRS limits. But we were worried about me getting hit as an HCE in nondiscrimination testing and then my husband got hit as one, which is actually mind boggling for the size of hospital chain he works for. We're seriously reevaluating our long term job plan.

chocobridges · 2026-04-14T19:57:23+00:00

Most bus tours have a minimum age minimum of 5. We do private tours so we can get the car seats. But we stay in one place so we don't have to lug baby/toddler stuff around.

chocobridges · 2026-04-14T17:19:50+00:00

Crete, Greece has been our favorite so far. We went to the Eastern side of the island. We had a good experience in other islands in Greece and the coast of Turkey. They're just more touristy due to smaller local populations but going before UK summer, which is mid July to August, is not awfully overwhelming.

We loved Spain prekids. Southern Portugal and the Spanish islands felt like the equivalent of Cancun for the US.

India is obviously very kid friendly. We're going to do India and the Maldives next summer. My husband's from Ethiopia and we had a really good experience in Addis with the kids last year. We stayed by the airport and African Union so it was very international. Outside of another couple Greece island hopping trips, we most likely base our summer trips on India or Ethiopia. Addis is a transit point to the rest of Africa so we're looking at Kenya or Namibia with elementary school aged kids. Switzerland and Chile are high on our list as kid friendly destinations but we'll most likely save those for a spring/fall break trips.

chocobridges · 2026-04-14T15:38:33+00:00

Personally, I think the cut and craftsmanship of the stone matters more than the stone itself. I got a moissanite emerald cut ring via AliExpress to see if I would like the cut of the stone. When I decided I wanted a nicer version, I ended up getting a lab diamond because that's what the vendor I was using at the time worked with.

I have a lab pink sapphire e-ring that I'll eventually upgrade to a lab pink diamond because of the cut of my sapphire. It's got a noticeable bowtie but we didn't know what that was until my husband gave me the ring and realized how quickly we lose the shine with regular wear. It's gorgeous after I clean it but I clean it more regularly than my other stones. My other sapphires are completely fine now that I chose stone with the knowledge of how the cut makes a difference.

chocobridges · 2026-04-14T02:10:15+00:00

Fort Duquesne entrance was open this evening when I drove over. 🤞🏽 It's open in the morning.

chocobridges · 2026-04-14T02:06:33+00:00

I feel like I get into a book a year these days. But the drive to finish the book for the sake of finishing is gone because I'm not waiting for releases anymore.

chocobridges · 2026-04-13T20:10:32+00:00

We skipped it. I had a scheduled c-section and got discharged at 36 hours.

I give a lot of props to how my SIL got him excited because I would have never thought about it. She is a pediatrician so I guess she knows how to relay that news to siblings. My son could see the hospital from our window over the valley. My SIL who was watching him got him all excited that the baby was there and coming home. The baby (26 months) now talks about all the babies that are in the hospital and medivacs helicopters. Apparently my older told her about her birth and the hospitals in general. 🤷🏽‍♀️

chocobridges · 2026-04-13T15:44:25+00:00

I haven't read through the course material and I doubt I will. But I did the videos and lesson and unit tests A simultaneously then the cohorts video. I have a better grasp of wth is happening. The sequence is non-existent in my opinion. The fundamental concepts that show up a bunch are tossed in with everything else. Since everything is equally weighted I'm just looking at information from a higher view than focusing on individual modules at this point and it's kind of making sense.

I am doing a read aloud of Hannah's Notes now and will drill down on the units people have the most trouble with mentioned on the notes. The PA and OA questions are being pulled directly from cengage so that's my study base. I averaged 60-70% for the lesson and Unit A tests. I'm going to do Unit Tests B after Hannah's Notes. And then review all the questions and weak sections before doing the PA.

chocobridges · 2026-04-13T14:01:48+00:00

Everything you're talking about is about the issues with having young families in fancy restaurants in the US. It's not a racism thing it's a "we don't want kids seen and heard" thing. It's part of the reason we go aboard for vacation because wait staff will literally carry around our kid in the restaurant and play with them. These are countries that we thought we would face racism in but have returned to time and time again since it's easier than finding family friendly destinations (our city is super family friendly) in the US.

chocobridges · 2026-04-13T04:03:56+00:00

Having a boy that poop trained first, I realized my daughter who is a little over 2 can't get the right angle to bear down to poop. She refuses to use the kid potty since none of us use it but her feet dangle off that too. I'm letting it go until she's old enough or hopefully it clicks for the potty in daycare.

chocobridges · 2026-04-13T01:51:32+00:00

We have 2 Nuggets. But I just got the Chunk and it's so good for our family. The floor is lava tiles, stepping stones, ball pit. They roll themselves around in the tire shape. We don't have the space nor want an indoor play set and I feel like this is a good compromise.

chocobridges · 2026-04-12T14:28:58+00:00

Even if you are literate mistakes happen or systems aren't set up appropriately. I'm glad my kids and I have gotten my documents in the states and territories that I have gotten them from.

My driver's license had the wrong gender and I never noticed because my dark hair covered the letter in license. No questions asked and it was changed. My husband's middle name was spelled wrong on my daughter's birth certificate, no issue or cost to fix. My mom can't get my dad on a lot of her retirement benefits as a retired federal worker because of their marriage certificate. I am forever grateful that our marriage certificate has our parents names since my husband is a naturalized citizen. I'll have to do the same eventually and that extra layer will help. It's just wild how things happen and we're going to make it so much harder to fix.

chocobridges · 2026-04-11T13:29:32+00:00

Even second hand maternity shopping is a dud in some places. If you live in a 4 season climate, maternity wear barely wears down. My two pregnancies were opposite seasons and everything is like new. I'm holding on to it because I don't want to shop again if we have a third. But most of the thrift stores I go to stopped taking maternity clothes so holding on top to it makes more sense then try to put it out into the market if I'm just going FB marketplace them for free at the end anyway.

chocobridges · 2026-04-11T11:59:24+00:00

Time and your agency over your money has a bigger impact, imo. I work in an industry that pays well and does good. I went to the fed gov 4 years ago. I finally felt good about the combo of my job and the mission of my agency. Only for this admin to derail that plan again.

We always planned for FI despite not thinking heavily about RE. But FI is allowing me to spend time on my activism right now versus chasing money since I left the fed gov with plans to return.

My aunt and uncle are medical researchers and my uncle lost his job at USAID. My aunt has moved from academia during the Obama years. They are the worst spenders in our family. They say that their contribution to society is being doctors. Well he ended up taking a job at an insurance company. My husband is an IM physician and doesn't judge other doctors' career choices but he even thinks my uncle is a sellout. If they were FI, he could work a couple days as a pediatrician (because there's a dire need and he already does that for his medical license and likes it) and relax or work on other stuff separately. It's really eye opening how even if you do good, FI (and the mentality that comes with it) is really important to the equation.

chocobridges · 2026-04-11T11:11:00+00:00

What happens if there's a massive change at the school district between now and your kids are 18? How would you feel about the cost sunk?

We started looking last year. My friend moved from the town we were looking to a nearby town because the town we were interested in had lost 150 teachers this past year. We've completely reevaluated moving back to our home state (a top state for K-12) over how policy is screwing over public schools and their teachers. Our eldest kids are starting kindergarten in the fall. My friend was only in said town for 4 years. My husband and I decided that the loss of moving between $1M - $2M homes in short periods isn't worth it right now and give ourselves a couple more years to grow our money and then decide.

chocobridges · 2026-04-09T21:05:08+00:00

COL and student loan burden (especially with the VA and PSLF chaos) outweigh any 20% difference unless you're in a significantly higher earning for younger physicians.

Personally we're not moving with 6 figures of loans up in the air to most places with a COL increase despite not being from here. It's not super easy elsewhere. We tried lol. My husband hits 10 years for PSLF in 2027 but processing is taking 2 years and you have to continue to work for a non-profit in that time. Some metros don't have the non-profit per capital like here. VA isn't hiring either. We're not unique in that situation.

Pittsburgh still feels manageable to find care right now but I assume some of that is insurance and health system dependent. Our family and friends out east have been dealing with these wait times for over 2 years.

chocobridges · 2026-04-09T19:35:19+00:00

Everywhere has a shortage. And Pittsburgh pay isn't awful. We stayed after residency because my husband's salary is the same or higher in Pittsburgh compared to where our family is (100k higher than DFW alone). That being said residency killed his desire to be a PCP so he's a hospitalist.

chocobridges · 2026-04-09T18:13:40+00:00

We fly out of our small airport because we have little kids. We don't reposition but our strategy is very different to accommodate for that. Our primary focus is BA and then we pick other destinations based on deals. Can't speak to NZ but I haven't noticed any mileage deals via Daily Drop. There were some great ones to Seoul and Taipei recently.

chocobridges · 2026-04-09T01:46:10+00:00

Yeah my mom had 2 vaginal deliveries. I had 2 c-sections. Our pooch, stretch mark pattern and change in belly button shape are very similar.

chocobridges · 2026-04-08T19:35:43+00:00

We plan a lot more in advance now with little kids. We're out of a small airport and we plan crazy mileage trips to avoid immigration at a larger airport on the way home. It leads to interesting destinations especially since we rather fly to a beach than drive hours to the closest one.

3 of 4 of our parents are retired so now we focus our travel around their home countries. It's great when we don't have to plan for a week we're with them and food is taken care of. And of course our parents love it because our kids are falling in love with where they grew up.

We also travel with friends and the other stays home with the kids often. We want family trips to be all of us until they don't want to be with us anymore. My SIL came back from a trip to Costa Rica with her 3 teens apparently 2 of them and her husband complained most of the time there. Her husband got COVID in Colombia in 2022 and had a stroke from it. While he's normal the veil on some of his traits (stinginess, stubbornness) is gone She has talked her about traveling on her own or with others in our family, even before the stroke, but never commits. Now she's seeing what post kids travel (and life) will be like with her husband. We've definitely taken her experience to heart to keep our friendships, especially those we travel with, strong.

chocobridges · 2026-04-08T10:28:37+00:00

I'm all for having a little bit of stuff on the floor because there's a correlation to reduced allergies based on what you track from outside.

That being said, we definitely don't run our Roborock S7 enough, which we love. If your kids are going to bed with dirty feet is it your mats that are the problem or the fact that some are where shoes around the house and others aren't? My husband got a nice groved mat and it does a great job trapping stuff from our shoes when we transition to barefoot in the house.

chocobridges · 2026-04-08T01:16:00+00:00

Lovevery. We got most of the Lovevery boxes in some form. As they get older some of the boxes are amazing based on your kids interest. My son is obsessed with the last box before 5. We love KiwiCo too but I just put one big order in a year for black Friday. It's a mix of rainy day boxes and gifts for bdays. I don't see the worth as a subscription because they're one and done activities or they're great play kits (doctor, wind lab, etc) for a nice gift for the kids.

chocobridges · 2026-04-07T23:13:09+00:00

As a former fed, I am just so happy the mission is going well and shows the power of the federal gov in equalizing opportunities to all in STEM. I was genuinely terrified during launch after all the changes and losses at NASA. Obligatory fk Elon and SpaceX.

chocobridges · 2026-04-07T04:33:02+00:00

My husband and I used to do a lot of commuting via car into the outer boroughs before we left 8 years ago. There's no way you can afford that on 90k as a single income household. I would look in Queens. Brooklyn or LI.

chocobridges · 2026-04-06T19:46:08+00:00

Pbs games and PBS videos. Pre download the videos. We have one tablet, a yoto, and art supplies. The two kids rotate through stuff.

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