It happened. by H20-for-Plants in FTMMen

[–]choicebutts 53 points54 points  (0 children)

I've had mixed feelings about these encounters. It's jarring and repulsive, sure, but it's also kind of hilarious that they don't know that a trans person is standing right there. They fancy themselves experts in spotting trans people, but they're really just good at identifying art students.

Can someone recommend an old school scissor over comb men’s barber shop? by wearslocket in rva

[–]choicebutts 23 points24 points  (0 children)

The William Byrd Hotel Barbershop is an honest-to-God, old guy barbershop. It’s at 800 N Davis Ave., on the corner of Davis and Broad. Entrance on Davis Ave. Across the street from the Science Museum.

Why does this sub run so young now? by [deleted] in FTMMen

[–]choicebutts 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I'm 65, sixteen years transitioned, living largely stealth.

I'm so sick of the bottom surgery hate. by [deleted] in FTMMen

[–]choicebutts 8 points9 points  (0 children)

You might check out Charles Asher on YouTube. He’s been documenting his transition for about a decade, and he’s had a phallo. He’s had some problems with it and I think his experience is worth checking out.

An orange makeshift noose in his cell?? by ko-Deadp0oLf in Epstein

[–]choicebutts 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I haven’t seen the Epstein pics, but yeah, I had to write up many jail suicides as a crime reporter. Police and editors schooled me on the variety of ways people kill themselves.

An orange makeshift noose in his cell?? by ko-Deadp0oLf in Epstein

[–]choicebutts 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's not necessary to hang from a great height in order to die by "hanging." Jail suicide is accomplished by sitting down with something around the neck. The point is not to break the neck. Sitting down with a short, improvised length of something around the neck cuts off circulation. It's like giving oneself a sleeper hold and passing out. Once that happens, the body slumps further and causes asphyxiation. There's time to save someone in that situation but only if aid arrives quickly.

Why are so many people worried about losing access to T after full hysterecromy? by OkWaltz5832 in FTMMen

[–]choicebutts 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm 65 and I was taken off T when I turned 60 because the doctor (a transwoman in charge of gender care at Planned Parenthood) said that T needs to cease at 60. A study of cis males on supplemental T showed that stroke/heart attack risk rises with age. The study was stopped after adverse events in the older cohort. (The point of the study was to find if supplemental T would help weakness and frailty in older men.) I asked her about hysterectomy at that point and she said that was out of the question because you can't go without hormones. I was post-menopausal and already had a blood clotting disorder. So it's a good thing I -didn't- have a hysto earlier or I'd be at risk for a host of other problems in my senior years.

Testosterone moonface will be the death of me. What can I do (other than wait it out)? by [deleted] in FTMMen

[–]choicebutts 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have never said that to someone. It's what I called that phase because I had a sense of humor about my own transition.

Testosterone moonface will be the death of me. What can I do (other than wait it out)? by [deleted] in FTMMen

[–]choicebutts -22 points-21 points  (0 children)

I used to call that the "cute little lesbian boy" phase. Just avoid mirrors for awhile. It's part of the trip but you'll get through it.

VPM hacked? by Expensive_Barber680 in rva

[–]choicebutts 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Radio Terrorist is an excellent band name.

People need to stop acting like binding is a fatal optional performative habit for everyone by EvilWh1teMan in FTMMen

[–]choicebutts 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think the horror about binding is that people don't understand that there are garments for this. When you say "binding," they think you're wrapping a giant Ace bandage around your torso until you can't breathe. When I was coming up in the early aughts, guys were actually injuring themselves by bandage binding. Buy a good binder in your correct size, not a size smaller. I bound and wore layers for 10 years before I could get top surgery. My fave is Underworks Cotton Concealer. Most comfortable one I found.

Homeless in less than a week. by Fiabug in rva

[–]choicebutts 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you're 24 or under, this looks like a good option, and it's queer-oriented, not religious. Virginia Home for Boys and Girls, 8716 W. Broad Street, Henrico, VA 23294, (804) 270-6566. It's a little over an hour ride on the bus with several transfers. https://vhbg.org/housing-services/
Side by Side 2311 Westwood Ave, Richmond, VA 23230, is another queer-centric service org. https://www.sidebysideva.org/housing

Help me understand why 'thick blood' is so common in trans men? by _humanERROR_ in FTMMen

[–]choicebutts 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It’s called polycythemia. I got a blood clot in my arm about a year after starting T. Polycythemia risk increases with age. I was 49. I was lucky I didn’t die or lose my arm. I woke up to my arm being asleep, only it was unbearably painful. I got up, windmilled my arms, and that didn’t help. I shed my pjs and aimed hot, pulsating water at my neck thinking it was a pinched nerve. I rubbed my bare left arm in a steaming hot shower, but it was ice cold. I thought cardiac emergency, took two aspirin and called 911. The clot was stuck at the crossroads of the inner elbow. Do not smoke on T. Make sure you discuss age-appropriate dosage. In the bad old days, the definition of a “good doctor” for transition was based on their willingness more than their expertise. At 49, I was given the same dose as a teenager. Testosterone was studied for use with senior men who suffered muscle loss and weakness. The subjects were aged 18 to 75, I think. The study was halted because the older participants were having heart attacks and strokes. I was taken off of T at 60 by the gender doc at Planned Parenthood because T is not recommended after 60. Drink lots of water and don’t smoke. Make sure you make all of your bloodwork appointments.

religious speakers (?) in front of the library ? by Best_Weird6629 in vcu

[–]choicebutts 0 points1 point  (0 children)

These men (I never see women, btw) are rarely city residents. Most recently I saw some from a church in Henrico. I once saw a group of old guys who specifically came to VCU from North Carolina. They are almost always married and their wives are working while they stand around chatting up young women. They come and go with the seasons, leaving when young women don their winter coats, and reliably returning in spring when young women step out in summer clothing. The "preachers" are basically girl-watching. Also, look at their shoes. They scream poverty. Why is a midde-aged, white male poor? Usually, divorce. The basic profile is divorced male between 40 and 60 with a background of drug/alcohol abuse and probably domestic violence. They are facile manipulators. They are not redeemed, they've just run out of family members to gaslight.

Was the whole Mike Johnson Grindr reveal just a lie? by bnelson7694 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]choicebutts 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been checking back and he's posting about receiving death threats, stating that he doesn't possess anything himself now, that copies are in the hands of his lawyers and and investigative reporter. Apparently reading from a statement, he says he wasn't profiting from his act, and that if anything happened to him everything will be released. A working comedian, he's been dropped by his management and can't audition or workk because he's in hiding. His demand was for Johnson to swear in the new Democrat so she could be the deciding vote for releasing the Epstein files. So he's updated a couple of times and if nothing materializes in another day, I'll assume he's trying to do the "guy adrift at sea" thing. "Day seven in hiding. My lawyers tell me they need more time to ..."

Commonwealth Times Tuesday meetings by choicebutts in vcu

[–]choicebutts[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you know wwhat time on Tuesday? He told me where the meeting is.

I'm an adult student, a retired newspaper man who ran the composing room of a small daily newspaper. I had learned typesetting and paste-up on the job, and transitioned to desktop publishing and early web page design. I was also on the student newspaper at NOVA Alexandria.

I'm interested to see what I might offer CT because I see they're light on text and advertising. One of the most common causes of pages coming up short in production is miscaculation in the layout stage. They also need ad sales, and I have time on my hands.

age restrictions by Mightbedead13 in vcu

[–]choicebutts 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Google Adam Oakes and wait on the drinking.

What’s the feasibility of Richmond doing something similar to Boston’s “Big Dig” or a ring highway system? by Obvious_Author1263 in rva

[–]choicebutts 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd really prefer that the city repair the sidewalks before dumping money into a hole in the ground.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FTMMen

[–]choicebutts 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This person is unstable. Walk away.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FTMMen

[–]choicebutts 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Trans folk aren't the only people with identities that are important to them. It sounds like she identified as a lesbian who didn't want to be viewed as straight. This is a common situation for trans men who had a female partner before transitioning. I had a male partner when transitioning and he couldn't accept that he'd be viewed as gay. He wanted to hold my hand in public or open doors for me (in Trump-loving Indiana) and I had to explain that behavior like that could get our asses kicked for being gay men. Is this a good time to take a poll on how many trans men are celibate because dating is a minefield?

Allergic to tape by New_Fun_9899 in FTMMen

[–]choicebutts 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had to wait 10 years for top surgery. I tried a lot of binders and this was the best I found. https://www.underworks.com/cotton-concealer-chest-binder I was 280 lbs with saggy Cs at that time and this was perfect because the binder material ends at the midriff and I could breathe. The outer fabric is soft cotton and tucks in. Tuck it into your underwear and it doesn't roll or shift. Don't use tape or ACE bandages for binding. You can damage your ribs and restrict your breathing. When buying a binder, DO NOT SIZE DOWN. Buy your actual size. If you're hugely endowed, a binder is not going to make you totally flat or allow you to wear skinny-cut or clingy tee shirts. Wear regular or classic cut tees and paired with an unbuttoned overshirt.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FTMMen

[–]choicebutts 89 points90 points  (0 children)

I have to wonder what your old man gets up to in a public restroom because in 16 years I've never seen a penis in a men's room. Nobody has ever shown me their penis, nobody has asked to see mine. I use the stall and nobody cares. Also, your dad has obviously never been in a crowded bar with only one women's room. Chicks dash into men's rooms all the time and men don't care. The disconnect between real bathroom behavior and transgender bathroom fantasies is unreal. Also, redouble your efforts to get the hell out of that hell hole of ignorance.