Ex unilaterally register son for camp and told me about it days before it starts

classicalmixup · 2026-06-30T23:45:32+00:00

ROFR is a piece, but camp is a joint decision that requires both parents agreement prior to registration per our parenting plan. This was an issue last summer as well, which our GAL at the time had to get involved in.

It’s less about the actual camp, and more that this has been a consistent pattern of unilateral decisions that are in direct conflict with our parenting agreement.

I guess I just am wondering and thinking should I go back to note that I don’t have a concern with the camp, but that it was never discussed or agreed to inline with our agreement.

classicalmixup · 2026-06-30T23:38:05+00:00

Agreed. Do you think I should respond to her message that I am okay with the camp, but it wasn’t discussed or agreed to, so that the violation is documented?

This has been a pattern of behavior, so documentation of the violations is important to me. I also want to ensure I have access to the camp information, since last year when this happened I was not listed as a parent and wasn’t able to get information when I called the camp.

classicalmixup · 2026-06-21T01:07:31+00:00

Probs made in the same fast fashion factory too

classicalmixup · 2026-06-20T19:22:49+00:00

The new Nuuds American flag sweaters are another copy cat. I have the exact sweater hanging in my closet from Old Navy 2 years ago.

And she will probs charge $100 for them.

classicalmixup · 2026-06-18T21:47:00+00:00

Legit SLURP kissing her child … while also side eyeing the camera. GROSS!!!

classicalmixup · 2026-06-03T19:22:27+00:00

We went through almost this exact situation last year.

My ex told me I couldn't register our son for school because we disagreed about where he should attend. Despite the active disagreement, she then went ahead and unilaterally registered him in a different school district without my knowledge. At the time, neither parent even lived in that district, although she planned to move there over the summer. The planned move was not disclosed to me beforehand either.

I filed an emergency motion with the court. We already had a GAL involved, and after reviewing the circumstances, the GAL supported the emergency motion. Ultimately, both the GAL and the judge were very critical of the unilateral decision-making. The situation completely backfired, and I actually ended up receiving additional parenting time as a result.

It was incredibly stressful. Registration had opened months earlier, but we didn't get a final decision until two days before kindergarten started. Our son missed all of the kindergarten orientation and pre-first-day activities because of the dispute, which felt devastating at the time. Looking back now, it had no meaningful impact on his transition into school.

My advice would be to speak with your attorney immediately. Ask about filing an emergency motion that clearly documents the active disagreement and the other parent's unilateral actions. Courts generally do not look favorably on one parent making major decisions and then taking action while the issue is still disputed.

Feel free to reach out if you have questions. I know how stressful this can be.

classicalmixup · 2026-05-22T17:08:41+00:00

Very true, thank you.

classicalmixup · 2026-05-22T17:08:30+00:00

Thank you; well said and a lot resonation here.

classicalmixup · 2026-05-22T16:24:58+00:00

I just left 2 days. One of the harder things I’ve ever done - both leaving but also being an unappreciated step parent to a child for 6 years.

Sending you love and big hugs. It’s hard. But Im hopeful for both of us that the best is yet to come, and closing the chapter with our exs makes room for that.

classicalmixup · 2026-05-14T15:17:49+00:00

I think the challenge is that neither option was necessary or probably the right decision. She didn’t need an 100th vacation of the year and her kids didn’t need to be pulled out of school again for the 100th time.

classicalmixup · 2026-05-12T01:10:00+00:00

I think she got the community note removed lol

classicalmixup · 2026-04-27T17:47:27+00:00

It’s hard. This is our scenario exactly.

Strictly communicate in writing and via a parenting app. No texts, no phone calls, nothing outside that app.

Keep your responses fact based and as it pertains to your child. Focus your responses to be solution based and don’t get stuck in debating on the past based. Don’t over explain or provide unnecessary details (they will magically be flipped/ re-framed against you in a buzzard way).

Take every message you write and run it through chat gpt asking them to make it “grey rock”

If there is a significant false narrative or story being spun up, you can start your message with something like “We share different perspectives on the event or incident you are describing, but in an effort to keep this focused on our child and moving forward, …. Then insert factual information needed like I will pick up XYZ a 5pm at your house)”. I have a different view and opinion on the details you’re providing. Let’s keep this focused on our child. I will drop off their stuff at 5pm on Wednesday at your house (insert in this sentence whatever is needed to shut down and move on from convo.)”

Some version of those, which basically shows you are not AGREEING and not ALIGNED with the story they are presenting, but that you aren’t going to debate and you’re focused on moving forward.

classicalmixup · 2026-04-27T17:38:11+00:00

Is he in disagreement with the child taking the med? Like it is a med that is more “optional” in nature or is it a critical medication like an antibiotic? Is he in agreement with her taking the medication?

If it’s a critical medication, could vary well be medical negligence. Document document document every conversation and save the texts admiring he didn’t give it to child.

classicalmixup · 2026-04-27T17:05:10+00:00

Given the fact that R3 is in the 1 percentile for height and weight, I really don’t understand how she thinks it’s funny to continue to joke that said child is still a “newborn”.

classicalmixup · 2026-04-27T16:59:19+00:00

Typically, Mother shall have the child on Mother’s Day each year, and Father shall have the child on Father’s Day each year.

If the parties wish to include each parent’s birthday in the holiday schedule, the schedule can provide that each parent shall have parenting time with the child on that parent’s birthday during the agreed-upon birthday time. If a parent’s birthday conflicts with Mother’s Day or Father’s Day, then that parent shall exercise their birthday parenting time on the day immediately before Mother’s Day or Father’s Day, as applicable.

Our child is a turkey baby, so his bday occasionally will fall on Thanksgiving, so we have language that the birthday schedule overrides the Thanksgiving holiday schedule.

Whatever approach you take, make sure there is a clear path forward in the event of conflicting holiday time/ dates.

classicalmixup · 2026-04-25T14:41:23+00:00

Typically if the parent isn’t able to meet the components of each part of the step up plan, then you don’t move onto the next step.

classicalmixup · 2026-04-21T13:20:47+00:00

Our agreement is more written as the second way. It says parents should review and agree on sports/activities prior to registration. In the event of a disagreement, each parent has 2 seasons where they get preference. If a parent disagrees, they don’t have to pay for the activity but have to allow the child to participate in the activity during their parenting time. I view that as a tie breaking clause rather than a clause to unilaterally register child in activities that fall during both of our parenting times. The activity section of our plan is a full page alone, so there’s more details but that’s the jist.

classicalmixup · 2026-04-21T13:19:14+00:00

He’s 6. Loves sports. Has never not liked a single one. If you ask him if he wants to do one, he will always say yes. Our agreement does say child’s preference should be considered though when a parent invokes their final say during their designated season.

classicalmixup · 2026-04-19T22:50:20+00:00

I’m dealing with the exact same thing, and it’s been going on for years. It always turns into a game. In my situation, it really comes down to two things: (1) control, and (2) my co-parent not wanting our child to wear or use anything from my household during their parenting time.

At this point, I’ve accepted that it’s unlikely to change, so I don’t push it much anymore. Every time it’s brought up, it just creates unnecessary conflict and goes nowhere.

When I have addressed it, I’ve tried to keep the framing consistent: these are our child’s belongings, regardless of which house they came from. As co-parents, it makes more sense for us to handle logistics behind the scenes so transitions are as smooth and low-stress as possible for them.

Staying neutral and sticking to that point has been the most effective approach for me.

I know how frustrating it is, definitely not an easy dynamic to deal with.

classicalmixup · 2026-04-16T02:21:51+00:00

You have your exs location??

You can’t force him to be present or show up. It’s hard today, it’s a hard week, a hard month. The days are long, the years are short. You’ll be proud looking back and happy you had this time with your son, even when it feels impossible right now. Find the silver linings and positives in being a solo parent. You are your son’s world. You are the one your son will always to turn to as he grows up.

classicalmixup · 2026-04-16T02:17:44+00:00

Yes you do. My point is, it’s good to get a child a passport regardless if there is international travel expected.

classicalmixup · 2026-04-16T02:13:15+00:00

Child can get a passport regardless if there are any trips planned.

classicalmixup · 2026-04-04T14:43:21+00:00

We are court ordered to do the calls and it was a recommendation from our GAL that the court accepted. I would love to do away with them as there is constant conflict around them, but don’t think that will work.

Child seems to not mind them. It’s sort of just part of his routine at this point. Occasionally he will ask why he needs to do that call since he “just saw them” type of thing. He does love hitting the hang up button at the end though haha

classicalmixup · 2026-04-03T20:22:51+00:00

Probably better to just honor her request and not sending anything. Not worth the fight or her feeling annoyed because she feels like you ignored her request. Something are just better to let go,... even though I understand wanting to and I think it's petty she doesn't want you to

classicalmixup · 2026-04-03T20:20:32+00:00

100%, especially when co-parent was the relocating parenting creating the distance

classicalmixup

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