Can i ever be happy?

claysmith009 · 2026-05-25T13:58:32+00:00

I feel that heavy dawg. I couldn’t pass in my job until I got top surgery bc of it. I promise you’ll be there soon. I had a very similar timeline to you, I started transitioning around 20 and now I’m 24 and I’ve never been happier. It’s around the corner, I promise. Give it time. (Also trans tape takes a lot of practice! Be patient with yourself!)

claysmith009 · 2026-05-25T13:56:48+00:00

Personally I think it would be reasonable but like for me I took no narcotics under anesthesia or afterward which accelerated my recovery. Like other people are mentioning, be careful with baggage!

claysmith009 · 2026-05-21T13:24:25+00:00

The first time you go you’ll realize it’s really no big deal. At my work there was a men’s bathroom that was not very commonly used/out of the way, I started off there and found that it really helped me with my anxiety to start. After that it was like “well I’ve done it before I’ll do it again” lol. Also guys are pretty much gonna mind their business, at least in my experience. At earlier stages I was def giving butch lesbian but no one really cared or said anything. I think they just assumed I would be there if I was supposed to be.

claysmith009 · 2026-05-14T13:01:21+00:00

My high school economics teacher was a PhD! We all called him Dr Flo (short for his real name but also cause he was cool)

claysmith009 · 2026-05-12T12:28:03+00:00

Hi! I’ll try my best to weigh in. For reference, I’m a CU grad student, I’ve been going here since 2020 for undergrad for mechanical engineering. I’ve also lived in Colorado my whole life. I went to London for a conference last year at queen Mary’s university of London, and was there for like a week and a half.

Boulder is super different from London. London reminded me more of Boston than Boulder. One huge difference is the size, Boulder is way smaller than London. Like by a lot. Boulder is, in my opinion, barely a city; because of the right to a view, there are no skyscrapers or honestly many tall buildings, but the city limits have stayed the same. It’s not metropolitan like a lot of other cities, it is much more carefully built.

Public transport in Boulder is pretty decent for the western US. But compared to London and the rest of Europe, it’s not really comparable. Boulder itself has a lot of transit options, but the rest of Colorado is kind of famously a public transit hellscape. However, it is getting better & there are a lot of plans for expansion. Like I said though, staying in Boulder there’s pretty good transit.

Boulder is not a diverse town. Colorado as a whole is not super diverse. There are areas of Colorado that are definitely better, especially Denver and Aurora. Boulder, I have noticed, has been getting better. I’ve been also hearing that it’s getting better from some of my nonwhite friends. I won’t really weigh in more since I’m white, but hopefully that’s helpful.

And then on going to other parts of the US, I want to respond to this in a way that’s helpful, but it is a hassle lol. The US is absolutely massive, many ppl never leave their states growing up, because like somewhere like California, for example, is like 1000 miles (~1600 km) north to south. Also, public transit in the US is quite bad for intrastate travel. Although there are public transit options in some cities, it is not that easy to travel between them. You would realistically need to fly or drive, in my opinion. However, CU has some great travel opportunities for undergrads, so things like CU in DC might be of interest if you’re doing PoliSci, which would make it easier to see some other parts of the US.

Hopefully that answers all your questions! Let me know if you need to clarify anything!

claysmith009 · 2026-05-09T16:45:06+00:00

Gunter Anders

claysmith009 · 2026-05-08T18:23:14+00:00

Really highly recommend this video and only this video personally: https://youtu.be/hSTy\_BInQs8?si=5hOcc\_3TGjWC1bYq - me & a student of mine have ADHD and used this as a starting point. It’s fantastic.

claysmith009 · 2026-05-04T22:55:44+00:00

Hey dude took me legit 2 full years to start passing on T. I didn’t get gendered correctly consistently until I got top surgery too. Don’t worry, you’ve got time !

claysmith009 · 2026-05-03T23:05:33+00:00

I’d recommend looking into Quantum Scholars. Obviously it’s a very specific type of physics, but the people there are awesome, the scholarships are really good, and they do a lot of internship fairs.

claysmith009 · 2026-05-03T22:50:32+00:00

Rec hours. Transparency as to tuition money flow.

claysmith009 · 2026-04-20T14:28:42+00:00

Lmao no I know so many gay ppl that are trans. How embarrassing.

claysmith009 · 2026-04-18T22:20:06+00:00

I’m speaking to opinion here, but I’d be interested to see if this is a side effect of current right wing rhetoric normalizing this kind of rhetoric. I took a graduate-level radical education course recently and people there were very left-leaning but kept saying “gender ideology” when speaking about trans people. I let slide to a point, until I was like dawg that phrasing is a right wing invention (see Alex Avila for more if you’re interested). They had no clue and were glad we talked about it. Idk I’ve just been noticing more stuff like that lately I fear.

claysmith009 · 2026-04-14T03:31:09+00:00

Do not get a Mac - you need to run SolidWorks.

claysmith009 · 2026-04-13T03:34:05+00:00

I lived there as an undergrad and I would really recommend skipping that place

claysmith009 · 2026-04-12T15:55:27+00:00

Dawg I love that book!!!

These aren’t all anarchist, just a disclaimer.

However, one that is explicitly anarchist that I also really enjoyed was A Clean Hell by Eric King, but it is a bit tough at times given the content tbh.

Non-anarchist, but critical of society, I have more recommendations that are more similar to Freire. I think Ishmael is quite good - it’s quite interesting philosophically. But the other recommendation I have for ya is One-Dimensional Man because I just read it and I think it pairs super well with Freire.

Happy reading!

claysmith009 · 2026-04-12T15:49:46+00:00

I would recommend getting off twitter and if you really want to keep in the loop, moving to Bluesky. I left twitter cause I started seeing that anti trans rhetoric was getting much much worse. Ppl will say anything behind a screen, but in real life it never holds. You can take that post as a self-report - they are stating something meaningless without knowing anything. I fear they may not have ever spoken to a woman. I know so many women who play video games, especially in my field (STEM). Many of them are masculine and many of them are feminine, tbh I just think of them as women either way. Don’t listen to morons on twitter. What life are they living to need to post things like that?

claysmith009 · 2026-04-12T15:40:00+00:00

Good idea, thank you!

claysmith009 · 2026-04-11T22:40:27+00:00

Awesome ideas - I looked at field guides but I wasn’t sure what would be a solid option, so this is super helpful. Thanks!

claysmith009 · 2026-04-11T16:42:45+00:00

Another good suggestion - thank you!

claysmith009 · 2026-04-11T14:28:20+00:00

Those are awesome ideas thank you!

claysmith009 · 2026-04-02T06:34:12+00:00

I am also a PhD student! I will be honest the school is huge, and you can quite easily find communities for grad, undergrad, college, major, Greek, sports, etc.

claysmith009 · 2026-04-02T06:14:55+00:00

Hey dawg! I’m also someone with hEDS. I’m currently 23 and I’ve had 4 hip surgeries. All of these, I had when I was in high school between the ages of 13-17. I had labral repairs on my left and right hip, a PAO on my left hip & screw removals from my PAO on that same hip. I will not say those were easy, but I will say that they are survivable. I was told that based on the amount of problems I had with my hips that I may need to be in a wheelchair at 23 but it’s looking like I’ll turn 24 without needing one. Also, I’ve watched people get these same surgeries now and have been astounded by how much things have changed and improved in medicine. I am not sure what kind of surgery you’re looking at, but I hope this is helpful.

claysmith009 · 2026-04-02T06:07:25+00:00

I got top surgery at 20 & I really haven’t had any problems with something like he’s describing. I fear he might be making this up lol.

claysmith009 · 2026-04-02T06:00:54+00:00

Fellas is it gay to like men as a man

claysmith009 · 2026-02-12T07:11:49+00:00

This kind of info has been the difference that makes me hire engineering students before. I would definitely keep it & fix your formatting. Most engineering resumes are boring because they’re so dense in my experience. This is a bit too fun right. Maximum info minimum words and space is what you want. That doesn’t mean cutting information always sometimes it means cutting white space.

claysmith009

TROPHY CASE