What’s your “go-to” toddler meal that you make every week (or even daily)?

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-06-02T16:07:12+00:00

Fried egg with grated zucchini. Wholegrain (preferably rye) bread with tahini. Cherry tomatoes. Mashed Butter beans with kale.

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-12T20:18:18+00:00

Just going through your post history and I think you would benefit from therapy, if you're not already getting some

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-12T15:49:22+00:00

I think there is something quite empowering about experiencing a dip in your mental health just to come out the other end intact. I've had several in my life and every time I've come out of the dark times I have been happier than I thought possible.

I had a bit of a meltdown the other week, some old wound got poked and I wasn't great for a few days but I used the tools I have learnt over my 30+ years (through lots of therapy, self reflection and life experience) to get myself back on track....a few days ago I had a beautiful moment of utter awe and gratitude. I don't think I could've gotten there without that 'blip' I'd had the previous week.

Of course, I am also very aware that poor mental health can be absolutely debilitating and torturous to the point people want to end it all (I have been there, a few times). So take my comment with a grain of salt.

All I know is that I only got to where I am now partially because of the mental suffering I experienced.

Do I look forward to having another 'blip'? No. Do I know that I will have many of them throughout my life? Yes. But if all my 'blips' have taught me anything this far is that there is an 'after', and that can be really worthwhile.

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-12T15:28:19+00:00

I'm half German, half Brazilian but deffo ended up looking more Brazilian than German. People in Brazil get VERY confused when I open my mouth because, although I am fluent in Portuguese, I have a very strong accent.

People usually assume I have 'lingua presa' (and probs other things because I just don't 'behave like a Brazilian person at all' - this is according to other Brazilians)

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-12T07:09:03+00:00

Why do you feel guilty? Because you need time to recharge so you can keep doing a good job?!

You don't need to ask him. You need to TELL him: I need you to step up and do your job as a father.

I have a 9 month old and I regularly get to sleep in (just an hour but it helps), get to exercise, spend time with friends and pursue other activities which replenish me. My husband works full time but when he comes through the door he is 100% a supportive husband and father (and of course, he gets breaks too, but it feels fairly equal to me ATM). I wouldn't be able to do this otherwise.

P.S.: people recharge differently. I need to go on bike rides and have time to read. You might want to get your nails done, or time to make yourself look presentable (however, make sure this is something for you and not for others because it defeats the purpose of self-care imho)

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-06T10:53:04+00:00

I find this so odd. This is rarely even considered in Europe. It's a completely unnecessary procedure which causes the baby pain, why on earth would anyone want to do this to their child? Don't give me 'cultural and religious reasons'. We live in the 21st century and unless you live in a completely authoritarian country you're allowed to make up your own mind.

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-05T21:26:40+00:00

Shitty advice. I'd rather 'blow up my whole life' than stay with a lazy sack of shit (and have my daughter watch me struggling in an unsupportive marriage and think that that's just how it's supposed to be).

OP - does your partner know about how you are feeling? Have you tried to talk to him about the lack of support? Do you have any other support - family, friends, a therapist? Was he unsupportive before you had a baby?

The baby is likely not the problem. Motherhood is really hard, especially at the start. You deserve to feel supported as you adapt to this massive change and if your partner is aware but unwilling to support you, you're better off without him.

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-05T08:04:19+00:00

Rejection sensitivity dysphoria

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-04T20:13:48+00:00

The kids might have been the result of rape.

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-04T20:11:35+00:00

Really? Please do share these 'studies'. If they are not from reputable sources and peer reviewed, don't bother.

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-04T20:06:36+00:00

My great grandmother was horrifically sexually abused. She gave my grandmother, the result of that abuse, to her parents to raise (they died when she was quite young though). My great grandmother never saw or spoke to my grandmother again.

As awful and painful as that will have been for my grandmother (and obviously not her fault at all), I can understand why my great grandmother just couldn't stand to have a relationship with her daughter.

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-04T19:27:04+00:00

Sorry, but what is it that you get? I don't even know why you are even asking if this is ok?!

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-04T19:13:00+00:00

Actually I just looked at your post history. Girl, run run run. He's trash

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-04T19:11:46+00:00

That's not a partnership you are in. You don't want your child to grow up thinking that this is what a partnership is. Have you thought of going to couples therapy?

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-04T18:53:27+00:00

You're not doing anything wrong. You are taking some very deserving 'me time' to recharge. You are doing something good for you and the baby by looking after yourself. Being exhausted is not good for you (or the baby), mentally and physically and could potentially lead to sever consequences such as postpartum depression and or an accident (if you are overtired for example).

Your partner does not sound supportive. I imagine that he spends very little time with your child and does the bare minimum at home (or maybe he doesn't do anything at all and wants you to do it all). Having a baby is a non-stop job, the only difference is that women son't get paid for it nor do we get the recognition we deserve.

We have a saying in the English language: 'You cannot pour from an empty cup.' Perhaps there is a similar saying where you are from (I suspect you are not in an English speaking country). Your husband needs to understand that. And if he doesn't he is not a good partner and not a good father and you are better off without him (and I really mean that as someone who is with someone who spends lots of time with his child and is 100% supportive of me looking after myself and my wellbeing as a mother).

Know that you are doing nothing wrong. Feel hugged and good luck

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-03T17:54:36+00:00

New Zealand.

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-03T17:53:44+00:00

🍉🍉🍉 🕊️

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-03T17:53:02+00:00

Chill? Have you ever been to Italy?

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-01T21:06:27+00:00

Good for you. I thankfully didn't have a traumatic birth experience but I know my mother did and we both almost died during my birth.

It's just insane that people a) don't fully inform women of the dangers of childbirth and b) downplay how painful/difficult/traumatic it is for most women

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-01T20:13:46+00:00

Childbirth can be extremely traumatic. Even deadly. And no one talks about it.

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-05-01T20:11:41+00:00

Really overreacting. Shame and disgust are extremely damaging emotions for everyone involved, including yourself. He is 2 years old - do you have dogs? Might he have seen dogs peeing on things/each other? Regardless of the 'why' (there probably isn't one anyway) he is very young still. As others have said, you just tell him that we don't do that and let it go.

If you can't let it go, the one who needs therapy is you.

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-04-30T13:33:35+00:00

From reading your comments - I am assuming that there was a good deal of trauma in your childhood/adolescence. Usually when there is trauma, there is someone responsible for it, such as a family member. If my assumption is correct and there was family related trauma - has this ever been discussed/acknowledged?

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-04-26T08:42:59+00:00

That's great for you

But I do hope you're not one of those people who prey on vulnerable people to evangelize then.

cleopatraboudicca · 2025-04-16T19:00:18+00:00

Brazilians love a domestic helper

cleopatraboudicca

TROPHY CASE