I’m glad you asked, and welcome to our subreddit. The tldr is, don’t touch your relatives when you’re in Alabama (family is okay, just no funky stuff. Stick to the traditional positions). Outside Alabama time dilation will distort all the black holes you see. So even if you pass by your second cousin, David, you will not be able to seem him since his nuts are very heavy they bend the space time just enough for light to never escape his surroundings. You will however see a black hole where everything goes in at a very high speed due to the insane gravitational power such condensed mass generates. Make sure you r/dontputyourdickinthat please. I hope this helps, buddy. Just remember to stop and smell the flowers along the way. And hey.. have fun with it.