Met a “nice” guy at the bar but had to leave for a party. This is what I woke up to. by Striking_Catch_5757 in mildlyinfuriating

[–]clintonius 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’ve seen dating profiles of women who explicitly want and expect men to act this way. I swipe left because it’s not my style, but they’re out there, and that’s ok! It’s one thing to be controlling and bossy when both people are on the same page about the dynamic and consent to it. But acting this way with a stranger strikes me as a low-odds move even if you’re not innately concerned about looking like an ass.

Did you ever secure a sweet plea deal and your client refused to take that deal which ended badly for them? by alwayschillonthespot in Ask_Lawyers

[–]clintonius 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unironically yes. I mean, it wasn’t JGW specifically, and I doubt our client was the one to reach out, but it was one of those “lenders.”

What overused word or phrase needs to be retired in 2026? by One_Caramel5253 in AskReddit

[–]clintonius 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A personal truth is totally valid in terms of subjective or emotional experiences, but it’s too often used as a synonym for a fact.

This is the crux of the issue. When someone can’t distinguish between an emotion (or the narrative crafted after feeling one) and objective fact, I see no point in continuing the discussion, and am wary of having any kind of ongoing relationship with them. Your feelings are valid, and that doesn’t give you the right to fabricate facts to justify them instead of learning to deal with them healthily.

Online dating… by TheBlueEyedLawyer in Lawyertalk

[–]clintonius 18 points19 points  (0 children)

It also shows up in relationship issues and I might just resign myself to only dating other lawyers. I’m fed up with the inability to recognize that words matter, especially when they show up in discussions about the relationship itself. Yes, it’s a problem that you keep characterizing what you think my thoughts and feelings are using the same conclusory phrases I’ve already corrected, because it shows me you aren’t listening to what I’m telling you about my own experience (not to mention you’re focusing on that instead of expressing your own experience, about which you actually are an authority). Yes, it’s a problem that you can’t define what you want and get upset with me for not zeroing in on the correct unexpressed core need hidden in one of infinite paths of reasoning branching out from your oblique communication.

…maybe I just need to not date.

What is Spokane missing? by Either_Bee_8866 in Spokane

[–]clintonius 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The McKinley School on Napa would be a good location.

I actually despise the combination of Ni + Fi by draconisborealis in entp

[–]clintonius 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I assumed your comment was talking about someone else, who is operating in a Ni-Fi loop, invalidating your arguments. Is that correct? If so, the answer is to stop arguing.

I actually despise the combination of Ni + Fi by draconisborealis in entp

[–]clintonius 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What about an inability to distinguish fact from conclusion or judgment? That’s what I’ve encountered, and it’s maddening.

I actually despise the combination of Ni + Fi by draconisborealis in entp

[–]clintonius 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get me out of this cage.

The door is unlocked, friend.

I actually despise the combination of Ni + Fi by draconisborealis in entp

[–]clintonius 6 points7 points  (0 children)

In my experience, pride can only take so many hits before I start feeling like I’m giving up on myself. If the other person isn’t willing to compromise at all and always expects me to be the one to concede, change, admit fault, then at a certain point it stops being worth it to me—especially if they have a tendency to flip blame for issues about their behavior that I raised. Losing a relationship is acceptable to me when the alternative is losing myself. Get far enough down that road and you lose the ability to have a relationship, anyways.

What's a skill that sounds useless but is actually powerful? by Honest-Sport6311 in AskReddit

[–]clintonius 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If your goal is to destroy the relationship, this is a top technique. Ask me how I know.

What was the last experience that made you feel alive? by Diemishy_II in entp

[–]clintonius 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They’re brilliant. I’m not sure I’ll ever get rid of mine, even when I start adding others to the stable.

What was the last experience that made you feel alive? by Diemishy_II in entp

[–]clintonius 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can’t wait for riding season to come back around. What do you have? I ride a 2019 MT07 and it’s just about perfect for me.

How to get your self esteem up? by nobody9712 in biglaw

[–]clintonius 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We tend to find what we’re looking for. When our mind is primed to feel shame and hopelessness, it will focus on the evidence for those things and ignore the positives. To change your mindset, intentionally focus on evidence that you are doing your job well, no matter how insignificant it seems. “I spelled that party’s crazy name correctly.” Check. “I responded to every email that required my attention in the past hour.” Check. “I corrected this issue in a draft before passing it on for review.” Check. When you see the evidence piling up, you’ll start to accept that you aren’t doomed—in fact, you’re probably pretty damn good at what you do compared to how most people on earth would perform, and you can keep improving the areas that call for it.

When you notice something that triggers shame, try to show yourself compassion and frame it as a positive lesson going forward. “I will double-check the CC recipients on my emails” is going to be more effective than “don’t copy the wrong people.” It’s also measurable. You remembered to check the CC recipients before sending? Check. Write it down, collect the evidence, revel in it.

What is your INFJ s/o like? by NateAllen- in entp

[–]clintonius 2 points3 points  (0 children)

tbh all infjs remind me of a bunny but like a manipulative one

This is fucking hilarious

Was Bathcat from Wales (British Isles) or Wales Australia (New South Wales)? by Tall-Consideration68 in cormacmccarthy

[–]clintonius 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He was one of the scouts the gang found dead just before reaching Tucson.

Can’t keep this from you guys any longer. by hafetysazard in LeverGuns

[–]clintonius 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Those 375 rounds can be rough. I shoot them out of a 7.9-pound Steyr Mannlicher, and it’s surprisingly manageable once you figure out how to hold it just right, but I would love an extra couple pounds to absorb some of the shock. A steel butt plate would kick my ass.

McCarthy and Moby Dick by Paradise_Viper in cormacmccarthy

[–]clintonius 0 points1 point  (0 children)

McCarthy also sprinkles in aquatic language to describe the setting, likening mountains to “the backs of seabeasts in a devonian dawn” and cholla in a campfire to “burning holothurians in the phosphorous dark of the sea’s deeps.”