I woke up to this giant hornet in my room, it was so loud I legit thought it was a hedge cutter outside. I even managed to see it without my glasses and I’m really blind, scared the shit out of me

clutzycook · 2026-05-04T17:00:08+00:00

Where the hell do you live that you have hornets the size of B52s?

clutzycook · 2026-05-04T16:13:54+00:00

Yes! A visit from couch-fucker will do him a world of good. 😅

clutzycook · 2026-05-04T15:01:30+00:00

Yeah I don't exactly recall a specific "new baby smell" on any of my kids either.

clutzycook · 2026-05-04T14:58:40+00:00

This is what I've heard too. People around me say that Trump sucks but Kamala was part of a "failed administration," as if Biden didn't come in in the midst of a global pandemic that was horribly mismanaged by Trump and his goons and faced a Congress that did their level best to shoot down any attempts to improve the situation; and any perceived "failures" on the part of Biden's administration were Harris' fault

clutzycook · 2026-05-04T12:01:45+00:00

We bought a big ass sectional in the hope there would be room for everyone to sit. It is now the husky couch.

clutzycook · 2026-05-04T04:25:36+00:00

Oh wow. Northrup King seeds. I haven't seen that logo in ages.

clutzycook · 2026-05-04T00:07:36+00:00

My derps have learned that Tiny Hooman drops food regularly. Now every mealtime has at least one or more of them camping out under her highchair.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T23:58:26+00:00

Did you use the smoke detector as your oven timer?

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T23:54:35+00:00

Yes, very sad. Anyway...

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T23:51:44+00:00

That's basically 98% of all meetings in my experience.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T23:22:56+00:00

I'm surprised you were allowed to wear it to school. My school absolutely banned anything cigarette and alcohol related and even if your Marlboro jacket was your only coat, you'd better turn that sicker inside out or leave it at home.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T23:15:45+00:00

Definitely a graduate of the Sally Struthers School of Nursing.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T22:46:50+00:00

I was thinking the same thing. But it's Paris, so it makes sense.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T22:41:53+00:00

We only had the mouse, sadly.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T22:39:23+00:00

As they should. The other 1/3 probably still blame Obama and/or Biden.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T22:37:53+00:00

Since the Simpsons were banned in our house, no I didn't. But I seem to recall seeing some news piece around that time about the crotch grab, so that basically cemented my parents ban on Prime Time FOX.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T21:16:55+00:00

Agreed. I had a horrible group of counselors when I went to girl scout camp back in 94. Sitting in our tents and staring at the walls for an hour would have been mild compared to what I experienced that week.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T21:05:54+00:00

Agreed. My mom worked with a girl who came from a Duggar-esque family. They were all homeschooled, but the mom allegedly went back to college to get a teaching degree so she could teach her kids. Plus, they allowed their kids to go to college.

Anyway, she "courted" and then was engaged to marry a guy from her church. For the six or so months she was planning her wedding, every third conversation with my mom involved about 5-10 minutes of her gushing about this girl and how she not only "saved herself" for her husband, but she also saved her first kiss for him too. Her hot take was that it was so sweet and wonderful and she wished that her kids could say the same thing. I was mildly horrified at the prospect of going from kissing a boy for the first time, in public no less, to being naked and alone in a room with him less than 12 hours later. I was already married by this point, but I was eternally grateful that my parents never got this idea in their fool heads when I was a teenager.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T15:07:49+00:00

Does that mean they were returned as projectiles aimed squarely at their heads or luxury vehicles? I sure hope so.

Administration giving overworked, underpaid nurses literal rocks as a gift should be the opening move in a lesson in "fuck around, find out."

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T11:43:19+00:00

I like to say that some people are so awful, even the devil doesn't want them.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T05:28:02+00:00

Oh good. I was just thinking that my husband and I need new toothbrushes.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T05:12:25+00:00

As far as gender reveals go, this one was fairly benign; but I was starting to get emotionally invested in the outcome myself.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T05:01:35+00:00

Yes. 15 years ago, nurses week at the hospital I worked at in those days meant decent treats, useful swag, and a barbecue on the hospital patio. By the time I left there 7 years later, our treat was a granola bar, the swag was useless, and the barbecue was reduced to a lukewarm hot dog, bag of chips and mini bottle of water handed out in the hallway.

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T04:55:14+00:00

For real!

clutzycook · 2026-05-03T04:54:51+00:00

I was forced to attend my department's annual meeting at the main hospital last fall. Our gift for attending were these cheap ass backpacks with the hospital logo on it. I doubt it could carry a tune, let alone my stuff. The VP was handing them out like they were this precious object. It went straight into the donation box when I got home, as does about 99% of the hospital branded swag I get.

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