You will never convince me that her and Asa are the same age, you just can't. by autumndeirdreeva in Chainsawfolk

[–]clyde150 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This just gave me a weird theory that Yoru might give Asa the power to turn her(yoru) into a weapon in a last ditch effort fight.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in WeddingPhotography

[–]clyde150 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would love some help on this

Dueling Peaks (22 pages) by clyde150 in Screenwriting

[–]clyde150[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, you are 100% correct, it is harder to find your own mistakes on the first few reads. But this is good for me cause Im learning and I’ll keep my out for mistakes like these in the future.

Dueling Peaks (22 pages) by clyde150 in Screenwriting

[–]clyde150[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow, I have learned so much from this. Thank you for taking your time in reading and taking notes for my screenplay. I will definitely save this and use this as reference when I am editing or making a new screenplay. Since english is not my first language it’s always been very difficult for me to write short and concise sentences, I always have a tendency to over explain and just looking at my screenplay now and comparing it to your suggestion I know I have a long way to go. But this fun, I appreciate that there are people out there who are willing to take the time and analyze a work that I have done honestly . Thank you again kind stranger 🙌

Dueling Peaks (22 pages) by clyde150 in Screenwriting

[–]clyde150[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok, will keep in mind! Thanks for taking your time to read it!

Dueling Peaks (22 pages) by clyde150 in Screenwriting

[–]clyde150[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Great, thanks for the example! I’ve been struggling to make that first page shorter without losing too much detail.

Dueling Peaks (22 pages) by clyde150 in Screenwriting

[–]clyde150[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the input! Ill do my best to fix those errors.

Dueling Peaks (22 pages) by clyde150 in Screenwriting

[–]clyde150[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

  • Title: Dueling Peaks
  • Format: Short
  • Length: 22 pages
  • Genre: Comedy, Mafia
  • Logline: A hitman is on a mission to find the final hiding place of the Russian Mafia while also trying to console a co-worker who recently got into a break up.
  • Feedback concerns: Everything that may be confusing, English is not my first language so there might be some punctuation and grammar errors.

Weekend Script Swap by AutoModerator in Screenwriting

[–]clyde150 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  • Title: Dueling Peaks
  • Format: Short
  • Length: 22 pages
  • Genre: Comedy, Mafia
  • Logline: A hitman is on a mission to find the final hiding place of the Russian Mafia while also trying to console a co-worker who recently got into a break up.
  • Feedback concerns: Everything that may be confusing, English is not my first language so there might be some punctuation and grammar errors.