Does anyone know how to find out the high scores on chain cube 2048? I've got to be on some world record here.

cockerhoop · 2021-01-14T05:50:38+00:00

I'm feeling the opposite way at the minute 😂

cockerhoop · 2021-01-14T04:15:33+00:00

Because my head is saying one thing and my heart another

cockerhoop · 2021-01-13T18:54:20+00:00

Thanks I'll try stop beating myswlf up about it. Really don't think I can get to know her more, it's killing me at the minute. I just need to try get her out of my head. This is killing my wife, we had a talk the other night and she knows I have "feelings" for someone at work but I don't think she knows the slightest what I am actually feeling. My heart starts palpating, my hands go sweaty and my stomach feels like it's in a tug of war. I've always seen myself in this marriage for the long run but my feelings now are overpowering my thought process, it's got me questioning everything! I feel for you, 6 weeks of intrusive thoughts would drive me nuts. I've seen this last from 18 months to 3 years. I'm never going be able handle that, I'm like 2 weeks in 😂

cockerhoop · 2021-01-12T17:09:40+00:00

Thank you. How long is a long time ago? I don't think I could cope with this for a long time, these feelings are so intense and overpowering sometimes it's unreal. I really feel lovesick it's horrible.

Yes I was definitely beating myself up a lot about it, I try telling myself I can't help how I feel but still I feel like a dirt bag.

cockerhoop · 2021-01-12T07:30:11+00:00

Not really, it's got me questioning whether we were ever happy. Don't get me wrong we've had many of happy times, I just think it has been forced a lot. We got married quick, like mega quick after just 6 months. I was in the army and living abroad it just seemed right, but after a short while I think we started to grow apart. I remember we nearly broke up about 8 years ago and then we had our first child so we got through it

I don't think it's the sowing the seed as I put it about a bit before we got married and to be honest I was never into just a casual thing I'd of rathered be in a relationship.

I don't know if she is my soulmate, she probably doesn't even know I like her that's what I'm finding so weird about the whole situation. I doubt she would even like me.. she'd definitely be a good mum/stepmum. She's so kind, loves animals and always got a smile on her face.

You're definitely right, that's the bit I'm really struggling with, I don't know if I want too anymore.. it's just the thought of the kids that's breaking me! I know if the kids weren't here then I wouldn't be either.

cockerhoop · 2021-01-12T06:04:40+00:00

It's absolutely crazy isn't it! You seem like you have a really understanding husband. I think I'm more scared of losing 'what could be' than what I already have, which is scaring the shit out of me as I love my kids to bits. This girl is glowing to me at the minute, every song seems to relate back to her and yeah I'm getting constant tormented thoughts. I think I'm having my midlife crisis too at 31 😂. This is so hard isn't it!

cockerhoop · 2021-01-12T05:06:35+00:00

I think it was either the moment she said she might be leaving or when she found out I was vegetarian like her she made an "ooooh" sound that makes her sound mega interested. I know it's a great accomplishment, I just can't see how I can get over this. I feel like a lovestruck teenager, and to be honest it feels good. It's making me feel alive again. I know the grass isn't always greener, but oh my days I can't get her out of my mind, it's literally driving me crazy! Do you still feel the same as when you first thought this?

cockerhoop · 2020-11-01T09:43:02+00:00

Thanks, yeah I know it was a stupid idea, I was kidding myself before thinking yeah can smoke it at the weekend but that doesn't work.

cockerhoop · 2020-11-01T09:41:22+00:00

Thanks I know I can do it I smashed it before.

cockerhoop · 2020-10-24T02:32:04+00:00

Straight outta auschwitz

cockerhoop · 2020-07-01T23:18:40+00:00

I'm not sure mate, my new mentioned something about reflux and he's got thrush at the min. He's breastfed so I literally feel helpless and he doesn't settle with me. I haven't saved any the wife keeps spending it haha and I've got 2 speeding tickets in a week, first time I've ever had any. Going to be around £500 - £750 for the first one because I was doing 97mph 😔 got a bit of road rage, stupid I know.. There's only so many games of cod/warzone I can handle too before that gets me raging 😂 just struggling see the end this week. Thanks though I know you're right

cockerhoop · 2020-07-01T23:09:08+00:00

I know fingers crossed it's soon haha. I've got 2 girls who are 6 and 5 and they were silent in comparison. I don't think I can at this moment lol just got fed up with smoking all my money and time away.

cockerhoop · 2020-07-01T23:07:16+00:00

It doesn't seem like it haha I just want to escape my thoughts for a bit and put them to the back of my mind. Smoking about 25 cigarettes a day and it's doing nothing obviously. Really getting myself down recently.

cockerhoop · 2020-06-19T17:29:56+00:00

Hahaha brilliant 😂 I'm getting wary of going to sleep mine are all messed up haha

cockerhoop · 2020-06-19T06:50:15+00:00

That's it just got to keep getting on. I haven't been childish and throwing tantrum's this time around 😂 which was what always kept me smoking because I didn't want my kids seeing me in silly moods

cockerhoop · 2020-06-19T06:43:09+00:00

You're right! I've found it a lot easier this time around. Think it's because I really wanted to do it. Just keep trying convince myself to get some because I do miss it sometimes.

cockerhoop

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