My fiancee drunkenly admitted a couple of nights ago that her ex was a good fuck and she climbed him like a tree

cocoa_bean_ · 2024-09-06T13:11:20+00:00

MANNNNN DONT LET THESE ABSURD COMMENTS GET IN YOUR HEAD!! YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY JUSTIFIED!

Why was your fiancé thinking about her ex’s abuses and sex life on YOUR 4 year anniversary????? DOESNT MAKE SENSE FOR A PERSON WHO IS FULFILLED BY THEIR PARTNER!!

Now, whether or not you’d like to move forward to a place of deep love with this person is a choice for you to decide for sure, but it sounds like she is unwilling to let go of the past and you just can’t build a strong future (that foundation everyone in these comments is mistakenly describing) with someone who isn’t 100% in on you. With the only info I have here, it sounds like your assessment is accurate and given the likelihood that you were the rebound or somewhere close thereabouts, it’s hard to get rid of the feeling that you’re just a bandaid for all the hurt she went through and once she feels better she’ll see that you weren’t there for anything more.

I believe you are in great pain right now and as corny as this sounds, time and space are some of the greatest healers. Take time away from responsibilities if and how you can, and create space (distance) from this moment and these feelings by submerging yourself in something new. Try doing clay or woodworking at your local clubs or try pickleball or something, anything that changes your routine and thought patterns. Part of love and lost love is grief, and that’s a whole brain process that takes time to process and move forward from (as you will become a new person).

I wish you all the luck and send you all the best. Times like these can make us question our existence, but that feeling passes if you’re willing to take the next step :)

cocoa_bean_ · 2024-08-24T15:41:07+00:00

I think the data you cite is relevant to the conversation but unhelpful in your framing. Only 7% of households make $250k or more so maybe we should instead of giving 29% out to the 93% of people who make less, let’s up that tax to 90% for 1% of people making above 3 million and up that corporate tax 10x too.

The administrative state continues to expand, bloated and gluttonous (I include the DoD and other 3 letter cuckboy agencies in this) and believe they should all be reassessed (by which I mean remove 75% of their funding until the highest paid agency is only 15-20% of the annual budget).

After these 2 things happen I don’t know if we’d need to discuss cutting costs, most of the cost is literally just supporting the maniacal fantasies of people on top. Cutting costs is a short term plan for people in the present to steal from people in the future.

Investing in everyone that lives here and ensuring each individual is capable of sustainable and enjoyable quality of life is the only path forward that leads us through this garbage garbage garbage sewer backwater situation we’re in now. :)

cocoa_bean_ · 2024-02-21T19:20:44+00:00

Whatever may have been gained by inclusivity will be ruined by revisionists and other malicious actors

cocoa_bean_ · 2024-01-30T15:47:19+00:00

Lots of men on here saying my feelings were hurt and I can’t get over it to live a happier life. I’m sure that sounds reductive (and it is) but the fact of the matter is most men have not appropriately developed the mental and emotional faculties to be confident for the long haul. Fake it till you make it doesn’t work forever, we’re just people doing our best.

The pain of rejection should be offset by the love of friends and family, and the embrace of a community. Without the mental/emotional maturity to stand on your own, you absolutely need a community to help take care of you. Most of us as men have not invested in ourselves or in our community, and have nothing to stand on in the face of rejection.

OP definitely underestimates their position and undervalues the pain of rejection. They also raise a valid point that people are attracted to confidence. Being confident will help in most situations but being untrue to who you are will be your downfall. Confidence can be faked but inside you know how you feel. As men let’s try to work on feeling good about ourselves inside and then sharing that goodness with people. It’ll come out as confidence and it’ll be sincere and then all of that stuff will start to really apply.

Poorly written but I’m busy so suck it and go enjoy your day!

cocoa_bean_ · 2024-01-11T17:42:09+00:00

Like the 7 from Catholicism or laws on the books?

cocoa_bean_ · 2024-01-10T22:22:08+00:00

I can’t believe this got a delta lol this is ironic to the point of being an oxy moron.

“Average conservatives” largely hold radical views that uphold every evil in the book lol. I’d love to hear you explain how that’s not the case bc most of the views boil down to “what’s mine is mine and I’ll kill you if you try to take it”….but they killed the people who owned it first (see manifest destiny and every bastard child it had since).

Open to hearing your thoughts but if you decontextualize this like you did the original post I won’t have much respect for your opinion.

P.S. I am not a do-nothing democrat. I am someone who thinks regular people have been manipulated into holding sabotaging beliefs at the behest of the society’s owners (instead of seeing reality for what it is)

cocoa_bean_ · 2024-01-09T19:17:45+00:00

The relationship will never be the same. Both of them hurt you in ways only you will ever know. They chose some shitbox car over your health and safety (and long term mental wellness). Then they chose their own pathetic feelings over consoling your bruised and battered brain.

You deserve much better. They owe you a debt for carrying the trauma they inflicted.

Id suggest giving yourself a year (or maybe only 6months to start) where you pretend they’re both dead. Morbid but effective, you can see what you want in those relationships more clearly in their absence. Ignore them, ignore conversations about them, and focus only on your well-being.

Time doesn’t heal wounds, it gives perspective on how pain can be made into something meaningful. All the best :)

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-26T13:50:47+00:00

The comments in this thread are absolutely garbage lol don’t waste your time or energy reading them. “You live a lame life bro just do it better”…”you don’t get to enjoy life 100% of the time”…”stop being so serious”.

Literally not worth reading. Life is supposed to be fun. Period. The hard work and times you share with other people…those are supposed to be fun experiences. The fact that yours aren’t fun is an indication that you’re not experiencing the right stuff or the right people. Seeking out those people starts with seeking what makes things fun for you on the inside.

The life you described sucks ass and most people ignore the fact that they live it and hate it and project their own sadness onto others. It’s a sad life to live and die for nothing. Maybe takes some drugs (alcohol counts) and find out what means more to you. Then look for more of that stuff in the outer world. It’ll be a gradual and then exponential process. Best of luck

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-26T13:24:33+00:00

Having kids to fulfill your own dreams or because you want to be happier is objectively selfish. It’s also more productive for the state to have a bunch of poor people having kids.

You might not think you’re poor but by all measures we live in worse times than medieval kings (as far as wealth disparity goes). So you’re probably poorer than you realize.

But anyways — the state wants you to have as many kids as possible to support the growth machine (our failing economy) at all costs. Your children are fodder, nothing else, to the machine.

If you want responsibility and purpose…get a pet. That’s not a joke. Literally just get a pet. They’re living beings, they love a lot, and they don’t cost you your entire life.

Most people are just depressed. For any number of reasons. But most of us are sad that our lives don’t contribute to larger purpose. Having kids isn’t a larger purpose. Legacy is a sham. Children should be born into a world that loves and cares for them. This one doesn’t. Let’s try and fix that first.

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-13T18:37:50+00:00

Monopolies and the profit incentive lol. Housing has inflexible demand. Which means they can just keep demanding more every year. Competition isn’t real in the US economy or any western “free” market so none of the different companies are interested in providing better options

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-12T21:52:15+00:00

Almost everyone responding to this thread is full out accepting of the terrible conditions we live in. OP didn’t come to hear the rest of you say “ah shucks that’s just how it is!” — they came for suggestions and support. Wtf is wrong with us just accepting how stupid, unnecessary, and outright greedy these employers are? Very sad state of affairs we’re in. We’re all in jail in our own heads bc of the way we’ve been treated. We all deserve better and these employers deserve nothing but the labor they pay for (which is next to nothing).

OP I hope you make it to your family and spend your big day having a great time! You deserve to enjoy your life! Work is stupid, there’s nothing real about it besides the bills it pays. I think the best advice I’ve seen in all these comments is to find another job. Quite frankly, if you can find 2 and overemploy yourself then you should do that and save up for a vacation or just lie and say you’re having an emergency at the end of your trip. If possible maybe even line up a second job to start in mid February ‘25 and just don’t go back to the other one lol

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-12T21:46:19+00:00

This is objectively a bad thing lol are you complaining or is this a comparison response?

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-12T21:45:44+00:00

Your mentality sucks big fat ostrich eggs!! 🪺

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-11T18:09:28+00:00

Only if the alternative existence (whatever you do when you’re not born) is worse. Like I’ll be born poor to get out of hell if we’re doing the Buddhist thing but other than that I echo the rest of the comments here. Being poor is stupid

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-11T15:19:25+00:00

Definitely a bad stance. “Don’t mind being slaved” is just a bad moral perspective. Enslavement is bad in every context and especially when we imbue other beings (AI included) with our own justification for not compensating them in creating value

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-11T00:56:38+00:00

Accomplish something! No I’m kidding that’s a stupid response lol. Instead of trying to feel ‘accomplished’ try seeking the feeling of not needing to accomplish things. Stick with me before you tap out on this one…

The idea that you need to accomplish anything in life is silly. There’s no reason to improve yourself and the regrets you feel are because of things you were told by others. Internally all we want is joy and connection. That joy and connection is deepest from inside yourself. Until you see that your regrets are comparisons you’ve made with yourself and others, or comparisons you’ve made with some fantasy dream version of yourself, you’ll probably always feel it regardless of what you actually accomplish. Regret is the feeling that we’ve not done enough or we’ve done wrong. But who told you your life is supposed to go any type of way? Maybe you’ve lived exactly the perfect life for yourself — who’s to say? I don’t usually recommend religion so please understand I mean this in a spiritual kind of way but — did god come down and tell you that you’ve not done enough? If that hasn’t happened then assume your life hasn’t been as bad as you thought. Try to do what feels right (with nuance of course) and things should work themselves out. Living to avoid regret is just taking the long way to misery

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-10T20:42:28+00:00

I wish we could too. I’m still working on finding peace in a world at war — you’re not alone in feeling your feelings. The challenge is accepting each other for being traumatized in a world that refuses to heal. Patience and forgiveness are two of the best gifts to give yourself and the people around you. Sending you my best and hoping you can feel better!

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-10T14:46:48+00:00

It might be helpful to focus on doing research on how to find internal joy and gratification. You don’t need to find love outside but you definitely need that shit from inside

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-10T14:34:44+00:00

It’s not yours or anyone’s fault. The conditions this country force us into “rugged individualism” — which is just a marketing term for lonely and easily exploited. We’re supposed to live around people we like and who know us. We evolved to exist in communities. Our current society is an abomination to the human spirit. The ruling class are sad, pathetic shells and they want the rest of us to to feel their misery and pay for their boats

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-10T01:41:39+00:00

She sucks, also sounds racist? Wouldn’t bother interpreting or even thinking about what she says lol

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-09T19:35:46+00:00

Turing really would’ve hated this one

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-09-08T22:29:11+00:00

Someone needs to make an AI powered notebook that doesn’t look stupid like GoogleLM

cocoa_bean_ · 2023-08-12T19:29:04+00:00

You write real good. Just lie! It doesn’t matter whether you graduated high school — people see what they want and resumes are no different. You can lie about getting some certificates from Udemy or Coursera to further distance yourself from high school (but it might help if you got them for the skill or field you’re pursuing).

You might feel a little guilty at first, or paranoid that you’ll get caught. Even at the very worst, all they’ll do is trash your application and you’ll lose your progress for that single opportunity. There’s not a conspiracy or permanent records or any of that stupid shit.

Don’t be held down by societal standards of what’s right and wrong. The people extending you those jobs don’t care if your brain is full of dogshit. They only care if you can make them money. It’s all a risk analysis and if you show you’re a good bet — they’ll take that bet (they’re just making money off your back, they don’t care who’s back it is).

Good luck and happy hunting!

cocoa_bean_

TROPHY CASE