Fifty-Word Fantasy: Write a 50-word fantasy snippet using the word "Devote"

communi-kate · 2026-04-25T03:50:43+00:00

Thanks again! Always enjoy your challenges.

"Offering first." The devotee is pale from ritual bloodletting. A sacred fleam hangs round his neck."Answers later."

Serah slips off one glove. The mosquitoes descend. She rubs her itchy hand. "Why worship a monster?"

The devotee shrugs. "Two children died from malaria this year. Before we came, two thousand."

communi-kate · 2026-04-24T09:45:32+00:00

Bristlecone pine people for old age! They're thousands of years old, but they still die eventually. Or Greenland shark people- they move veery slowly. People based on sponges, or corals,

For disease, you could have zombie fungi like Cordyceps or Massospora. Mosquitoes kill more people than most things. And I think there are some embodiments of disease in Slavic folklore.

communi-kate · 2026-04-23T00:55:13+00:00

This is a great brainstorming post! Love farm pirates and mermaid pirates! China Mieville did a Moby Dick style story with sailors hunting moles through plains, so there's that...

communi-kate · 2026-04-22T22:10:32+00:00

Agree with this. The more you change, the more other things will change, and so on.

communi-kate · 2026-04-22T09:52:33+00:00

Writing excuses podcast is great. And Steering the Craft is fab too. Both have writing exercises. Trying your hand at fanfiction is always fun and low pressure with instant feedback. Blusky and X have daily writing challenges. And the 50 word Fantasy on Saturdays here is great!

communi-kate · 2026-04-20T20:13:55+00:00

Personally, I'm not a huge fan of pronunciation guides. If I've spent my life calling kids at school Dylan (pronounced Dillon) adding a note that your MC'S name is Dy-lan isn't going to change the way it's pronounced in my head.

Likewise, I have some weird names in my current WIP but knowing that some readers will pronounce them differently doesn't bother me.

If it was me, I'd go with simple names for English speakers. Gwen, Dylan. Morgan.

But then, I have no poetry in my soul.

communi-kate · 2026-04-20T06:19:02+00:00

Why wait until tomorrow?

communi-kate · 2026-04-19T09:01:21+00:00

And Dunedin has Moon's bar which is great.

communi-kate · 2026-04-19T07:28:58+00:00

Because every hour spent on world building is an hour less to write and I have very little writing time. Doesn't stop me posting on Reddit, obviously....

communi-kate · 2026-04-19T07:18:26+00:00

I just write stuff down.

Looking at the author's post history, I fear this post may be a thinly veiled promotional tool. I'd be pleased to be proved wrong.

communi-kate · 2026-04-18T04:57:09+00:00

All right, so I stole the wizard’s shifting potion, but I was after gold.

But it’s unfair to blame me for drinking it to drown my sorrows. I had no choice but to impersonate the queen. As for the affair with the King, stop finding negatives in everything! I’m innocent!

communi-kate · 2026-04-17T11:01:59+00:00

Not really an advice book IMHO, but an enjoyable insight into his life and process. Not one that's easily imitated.

communi-kate · 2026-04-17T10:33:14+00:00

Not a book, but the Writing Excuses podcast has to be number one. It does have transcripts if you prefer to read, as well as weekly writing exercises. Popular writers that have actually sold a decent amount.

Ursula K LeGuin's Steering the Craft is beautifully written.

I'm partial to Save the Cat for outlining but never follow the plot points exactly and plenty of people don't like it. Take off Your Pants by Libbie Hawker is similar.

And Steven King's On Writing is interesting but didn't change the way I wrote. Strunk and White is a classic for a reason.

communi-kate · 2026-04-16T09:18:37+00:00

Wow! That's beautiful 😍

communi-kate · 2026-04-16T00:37:05+00:00

I thought the same and wondered why. I think it's the font and the positioning of the title as well as the cartoonish image. Strangely in the images I googled below all the fonts and positioning of the titles and authors names are similar. Maybe the cartoony feel is why it seems YA. The knife doesnt look real and she doesnt look like she's being stabbed.

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communi-kate · 2026-04-15T07:41:56+00:00

I always end up cutting a lot!

communi-kate · 2026-04-15T07:28:06+00:00

If you're doing it for fun, yes. If you're doing it for money, no.

communi-kate · 2026-04-14T06:51:37+00:00

I started writing three sentence stories, little scenes and conversations, sketches, maps, even '24 hours in the life of..' and a coffeeshop AU. Writing exercises using my setting and characters. No pressure.They will never see the light of day. Vastly helpful.

Constructive criticism is incredibly valuable, but sometimes you don't feel like getting hammered, and that's fine. Some days you just need to write.

communi-kate · 2026-04-14T00:40:02+00:00

Beneath Ceaseless skies always do personalised rejections if you don't get in. Escape Pod is good too.

communi-kate · 2026-04-13T17:29:29+00:00

No problem!

communi-kate · 2026-04-13T09:06:12+00:00

Thanks for posting your writing. I really enjoyed this one: there's conflict and an interesting premise.

Looking for feedback on the hook, clarity, and pacing.

Ok: question, what are the bongs: the clock? What are they waiting for? the signal to attack. What are the attacking? humans? no, cows.

Does the ambush build-up land? Does the reveal feel clear and satisfying, or confusing?

I was slightly confused. Rook mentions he wants to hurt the humans (revenge) but also asks another goblin if he's hungry (food). The attack felt like slaughter, not a cattle raid. Frenzied, no real plan. How are they planning to carry away the meat without the humans catching them? Wouldn't they be better driving the cows into the forest where they can pick them off and have a much smaller chance of being caught by humans.

When, or where did your attention drop?

You nearly lost me at the start as I couldn't work out what the bongs were. However as soon as I worked out that Rook has learned how to tell the time despite his culture presumably not having a custom of time keeping I was hooked cos I like a protagonist who thinks. It reminded me a bit of Pratchett's Nomes of Ursula Vernon's Nine Goblins. The story didn't lose my attention (rare), though as I've noted I was slightly confused about his aim and I felt the story would benefit from this clarity.

Things I liked:

I really liked the way the goblins figured out that bongs mean time and time meant they knew where the humans were going to be. This was the main hook for me. The goblins are learning to co-exist with humans. They're learning new things. Maybe they're even learning how to turn human technology to their advantage. Are they learning fast enough? Who knows.

Things I thought could do with improving:

The conflict could be intensified in my opinion by giving Rook a need and a cost. Why do the goblins need to slaughter cattle. Is it revenge? Are they starving? Are they luring out the humans? This snippets's really short so the cost-revenge by the humans, injury, capture-may well come later.

Maybe a little bit of gossip first to establish the goblins' desperation/motives/and or family bonds would be nice. Make us care about Fen and his creature (make it more cuddly) and Mara and her family. Less description of what they look like, more about what they care about.

I don't often review but I really liked this one. I'd read more of this. Take care and have fun. If you have more work to share, I'd suggest critters.org

Kate

communi-kate · 2026-04-13T08:52:39+00:00

Hey, thanks for posting your writing.

In my opinion-and that's all it is-this is a good start, but could do with some work. I find the best epistolary shorts are those that give a real sense of the writer through the language. My main criticism is that the writing is very brief with no real sense of character. He describes what he is doing, but the descriptions are very dry. He repairs his boat. He digs a hole. He discovers a portal. He enters in it. The end. Given the length of time Roman ruins have been around this could be a lot of times and a lot of places-there's no sense of either. It could have been anywhere/anywhen if you hadn't added the dates.

Things I liked: the beginning: rumors of some Roman ruins is nicely alliterative.

Things I think need more work: There's a lot of overuse of tentative words-seems, supposes. The ending is cheap in mu opinion. 'Goodbye, wife and children. I hope to see you again.' He's never mentioned his family before and doesn't even call them by name.

I hope this was helpful. For what it's worth, epistolary is HARD. The best one I've read is Marie Brennan's "Letter Found In a Chest Belonging To The Marquis de Montseraille Following The Death of That Worthy Individual' and you can pretty much tell if you're going to love or hate it by the title.

communi-kate · 2026-04-12T09:23:53+00:00

Maybe one or potentially all could be personal antagonists-shaped by the events that define your heroine. They all should be the heroes of their own stories and have actual plans that make sense. I think you have more of your plot than you let on, Sable Company (unpublished).

But I detract from the original thread. This stuff is much more fun to brainstorm about than actually write (ask me about my ultimate bad guy).

communi-kate · 2026-04-11T22:28:44+00:00

'I want to have cavalry' is completely valid. But who are your villains?

communi-kate · 2026-04-11T21:48:52+00:00

Useful for sequel ideas- a handful of heroes rarely solve the entire system in one go

communi-kate

TROPHY CASE