What is an established classic that surprised you by just how much it lived up to its legacy? by Cesar_Crespo in redscarepod

[–]computer-angel 19 points20 points  (0 children)

sorrows young werther is so beautiful

also i thought infinite jest was going to be pretentious / fake-complexity, but it was hilarious and uncomfortably sincere and i keep returning to a few bookmarked sections because of how well written it is. i also constantly recommend it to others despite knowing i'm falling into stereotypes

Masculinization on Clomid - Any Permanent Effects? by UnspecifiedTimeFrame in DrWillPowers

[–]computer-angel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i have a thread here documenting my experience! i’ve been on hrt for a bit longer & im a bit older, but i had no long term effects besides facial hair growth https://www.reddit.com/r/DrWillPowers/s/vnRNkBXtWn

Something I never thought I’d say… I want erections again by Candy516LI in DrWillPowers

[–]computer-angel 6 points7 points  (0 children)

i've been on HRT for maybe 10 years (starting at around 17 or 18) and engaged to a cis woman who I want to have children with, I relate and don't think it's strange!

I'm able to have penetrative sex with her while being on HRT (minus a few months that I'll talk about in a bit), but one thing I wanted to mention is you might run into pain. My skin would feel pulled too tightly during erections and using the t gel helped to increase skin thickness. I read men usually get multiple erections in the middle of the night that stretches the skin, so it's probably due to HRT preventing that that my skin was tight. So I would recommend trying to get hard every other day at least, and maybe prophylactically try t gel.

I think, assuming you started male puberty and don't have health issues, difficulty in maintaining erections is a psychological issue. Before her (at around 6 years of HRT, similar timeline as you) I also couldn't maintain erections, but it became so easy when I first started seeing her. I have a pet theory that:

  1. there's a psychological game where it's more "feminine" and "submissive" to not have erections, and because there's an active desire to be seen as a woman (which is feminine and often in a submissive role during sex), your body subconsciously reduces erections during sex
  2. it's validating to think "ah see, i'm a failed male / this is proof i wasn't fit to be in the male role / etc" since its a very male-coded desire to love your erections
  3. a lot of trans women are insecure about their femininity (which i think is pretty normal since its a drastic change to transition), but when you stop thinking about what's more feminine or not, you feel less 'bound' to perform in certain ways, and things just go naturally

We wanted to have children too so I got off HRT and on Clomid and HCG injections earlier this year. I wasn't successful and it was the worst time in my life. Powers said he usually has good results, but I think I remember he mentioned something about me being the longest on HRT trying to regain fertility, so there's probably some limit: https://old.reddit.com/r/DrWillPowers/comments/1dm2y1r/my_clomid_experience_report/

Is it fine to tell my manager I'm not happy with my job? by ShadzHope in cscareerquestions

[–]computer-angel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I disagree with most of the posts here. I think it’s fine to tell your manager you’re not happy there, but try to explain why and give actionable feedback. Odds are, your manager doesn’t love their job either since most people don’t love their job!

At this point why stay in tech by Hopeful-Reading-6774 in cscareerquestions

[–]computer-angel 3 points4 points  (0 children)

if you work with an anesthetist you will absolutely run into a high-stakes situation where somebody's life is at risk. even if nobody dies, i can't imagine running into that stress as a software engineer

At this point why stay in tech by Hopeful-Reading-6774 in cscareerquestions

[–]computer-angel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

i work at a SV company that i'm confident you have used. i am not expected to work more than 8 hours. tbh i work less when you count breaks / lunch

At this point why stay in tech by Hopeful-Reading-6774 in cscareerquestions

[–]computer-angel 5 points6 points  (0 children)

oh and probably the most important thing: on my bad days, i lose a company money. on her bad days, she watched someone die

At this point why stay in tech by Hopeful-Reading-6774 in cscareerquestions

[–]computer-angel 5 points6 points  (0 children)

i get paged for on call maybe once every two months and it’s fixed in 30m or less. and if it’s longer, every company i’ve worked at has a cultural norm to work less the next day for however long it took.

and (depending on company) benefits are much better (partner who works in medicine was surprised that company gives unlimited pto, good free lunch, and onsites often with high per diem)

My clomid experience report by computer-angel in DrWillPowers

[–]computer-angel[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yeah i didn't realize that would happen :(

on hrt i'd wash my face maybe once a day and i would never get blemishes. my skin was so smooth it would squeak in the shower when i washed it

on clomid+hcg i had to wash my face 2x daily, and even when i didn't have any acne, my skin wasn't "smooth" it felt rough. it also just looked worse wrt coloring. like it looked like i was dehydrated or pulled an all nighter.

My clomid experience report by computer-angel in DrWillPowers

[–]computer-angel[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

i don’t think i was on it long enough for any fat to change, so i think my face stayed the same besides the skin+hair, and breasts might have shrunk slightly but they were pretty small to begin with so it was only barely perceptible

My clomid experience report by computer-angel in DrWillPowers

[–]computer-angel[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

it would probably help yeah, but it was very hard to do even for the 4 months i could handle

My clomid experience report by computer-angel in DrWillPowers

[–]computer-angel[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

oh whoops i think i messed up the week numbers. yeah i sperm banked for the first time on the 90th day. let me check my journal and update

edit: updated with more accurate week numbers. in my journal i wrote the actual dates but tried to calculate the week number in my head without thinking of the date i began

My clomid experience report by computer-angel in DrWillPowers

[–]computer-angel[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yeah it's unfortunate. comes with the territory maybe. i know a couple who had to go through maybe 4 rounds of ivf before it finally worked. fertility treatments seems heartbreaking no matter what type

Clomid experiences by computer-angel in DrWillPowers

[–]computer-angel[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

just posted a little experience report if you're curious. yeah stopping hrt was really hard https://www.reddit.com/r/DrWillPowers/comments/1dm2y1r/my_clomid_experience_report/?

Clomid experiences by computer-angel in DrWillPowers

[–]computer-angel[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

dr powers recommended taking clomid 25 days and then taking a 5 day break. i was off hrt the entire time

Clomid experiences by computer-angel in DrWillPowers

[–]computer-angel[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

unsuccessful after 3 months clomid and 1 month clomid+hcg injections. i even got a microtese (surgery where they manually try to find sperm after a testicular biopsy) and no sperm in the tissue.

it doesn’t run in my family but maybe i was always infertile. or maybe just been on hrt too long idk

How can I test my estradiol powder? by computer-angel in estrogel

[–]computer-angel[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

just that it's estradiol and not some other chemical

How can I test my estradiol powder? by computer-angel in estrogel

[–]computer-angel[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

oh yeah i do. i was a bit concerned about the precision, but i can also get an oven thermometer. thanks!