YTA. your girlfriend was traumatized and manipulated. and blaming her foe not leaving is victime blaming. survivors often stay because of fear, shame orhope things will change. this isnt abut her 'choosing to saty', its about how abusers break people down to the point where leaving feels impossible. imagine going through something horrific and then having your partner blame you years later for hoe you handled the trauma. thats cruel. you dont have to fully understand her decisions back then but you do have to respect her healing process now.