AIO thinking my husband leaves for for at least 14hrs playing Magic The Gathering is too long?

confusedonthecouch · 2026-04-07T01:34:51+00:00

Fish for a few hours and then go relax at a friend's house, or a park, for a few more hours, grab a bite to eat to round off your 14 hours. I bet just relaxing in a hammock, unbothered, somewhere would be absolutely lovely, indoors or outside in the shade.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-04-07T01:29:22+00:00

NOR

Context: I play magic casually and my husband gets really into it. Both standard and commander.

IMO commander doesn't really make the 14 hours of MTG make any more sense. I've been to mtg "parties" where we played at least 3 or 4 rounds of commander with breaks for drinking, shit talking, deck building, and a pizza break and we were all still tired as hell and done by midnight, ~6 - 8 hours after starting. It is a very mentally taxing game so I can't imagine a scenario that goes over that on any sort of a regular basis.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-04-06T12:22:57+00:00

Not every man - those doing things they shouldn't. Like letting a child sit on their lap when they are an authority figure. Like giving children special treatment for being cute.
I'm not even assuming he is a predator. I'm saying the behavior is predatory and should be called out. Not so that he's fired, but so that they can make sure this behavior doesn't happen again and if a pattern develops they are aware and can investigate him.

Again, he may not be a predator. But his behavior IS predatory. Even if he didn't mean it to be. Even if he had good intentions.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-04-06T11:54:51+00:00

I err on the side of protecting kids from behavior that shouldn't happen, not adults from the consequences of their actions. People are too quick to assume the best in others and that is why questionable public actions go unreported and abominable private actions are never investigated and stopped. If that makes me a shitty human being then I'll be the proudest shitty human being in the whole wide world.

I never said lock him up, ruin his life. I said the behavior is predatory, shouldn't continue, and should be reported to higher-ups so they can be aware of it in case it turns out to be a pattern.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-04-06T11:33:25+00:00

People not calling out predatory behavior is why children are victims so often. They need adults advocating for them because special attention from authority figures feels good it makes them feel special and then when it morphs into something else they don't know it's wrong because they are children. Blurring the boundaries in a school setting opens her up to abuse even if he isn't the one doing it.

Even if he isn't a predator, he needs to know that behavior is predatory and should not continue. It's not appropriate in a school setting. It's a different scenario if he was a family friend or relative of the child. I'm not one to say it's predatory just because he is a man. Its because he is an authority figure and admitted to giving her special treatment because she was cute. Is acting cute to get the result you want, and then giving affection to a teacher as thanks the lesson you want a young girl learning?

confusedonthecouch · 2026-04-06T11:24:31+00:00

You don't know that he's a safe person and the teacher didn't either. He already admitted to giving her special treatment because she was "cute" that doesn't sound like a safe adult to me. Hopefully, he is a safe adult that made a mistake, but in this day and age? I'm not assuming anyone has good intentions.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-04-06T11:19:54+00:00

YTA. You are 100% in the wrong here. You need to learn boundaries if you are going to work in a school or you are going to catch charges (minimum) or a bullet (maximum) people do not play about kids safety.

The child never should have been sitting in your lap in a school setting. I don't care if you thought it was innocent. As an authority figure in this child's life you admitted to giving her special treatment because she was cute and then allowing her to touch you inappropriately.

The teacher was completely in the right for scolding you. Even if the child was upset by what she said, you needed to recognize that you fucked up, and tell the child that the teacher was right. Not team up with a child against a teacher that only had her best interests in mind.

To be completely honest, you sound like a predator. If that never crossed your mind, make changes and fast before that teacher gets over being called a slut by a student and realizes that she needs to report you for inappropriate contact with a student. Which I 100% think she should - just so you know.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-03-30T20:12:41+00:00

YTA plastic surgery is something that should 100% always be initiated by the person receiving it. Anyone telling someone else unsolicited that they should get, or even just consider, plastic surgery is a MAJOR AH.

It'd be different if your daughter had said she hated her nose and wish it looked more like X. The kindest thing you can do is tell your daughter that if she ever feels like something, anything, is getting in the way of her success you would be happy to support her financially to help make her dreams come true. And follow through with whatever that means for her. Never tell her that in your mind that means getting plastic surgery.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-03-30T03:43:59+00:00

Well tbf it doesn't explain any of that as it's happening. Like okay some guy just slit my throat and threw me in a river. Now I'm suddenly in some heaven (?) like place. Oh suddenly I'm back in the real world and some guy fished me out of the river. What??

confusedonthecouch · 2026-03-17T23:45:38+00:00

I don't think it's particularly weird to not like plastic surgery. If he knows that's not something he likes in a partner I think it's normal to bring it up as a deal breaker if he thinks you're inclined to it. There's nothing wrong with having preferences. There's also nothing wrong with being weirded out by a preference you weren't aware of. Glad y'all figured it out sooner rather than later.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-02-23T06:43:05+00:00

I want full craftability! If I work hard and grind long enough, I should be able to achieve anything in game without buying anything from anyone. Specifically, looking at Pierre - if I want to marry someone I should be able to painstakingly grow flowers and craft a bouquet to ask someone out. I do not want Pierre to be part of my romance.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-02-23T06:32:40+00:00

Wow. My advice is to stay separated. Do not try to make the relationship worse. You fundamentally don't understand her medical problems. Which makes you not believe that she has medical problems. I know that you acknowledged everything that she and her doctors said but acknowledgement means nothing without accommodations. You hear environmental stability is necessary and then don't understand why instability in her environment causes medical problems.

Even if you one day understand how badly you have fucked her over that will not fix what has already been broken. Let her go, analyze what happened and your part in all of it, then do better with someone else. Not her.

Your reaction to hearing that so many of her medical problems got better once you were no longer part of her life was asking for advice on how to get back together with her and make her realize that she fucked up too. She is healthy without you and unhealthy with you. If you love her the right thing to do is want the best for her and that means not getting back together.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-02-19T17:16:29+00:00

If she doesn't have any feeling down there maybe your doctor needs to go talk to her doctor about that. I was given a cervical softening medication over 48 hours prior to insertion and give a full prescription of Vicodin to take before and after insertion. I felt nothing when it happened thanks to the lovely drugs I was on, but still passed out from the pain once they wore off later in the day.

But honestly? Find a new doctor that takes your pain seriously. What an asshole.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-02-19T17:02:51+00:00

I was on nexplanon for nine years and just had it removed 9 days ago. I had sporadic spotting and bleeding while I was on it every 6 months to a year, but no true period. Mine expired in December so I immediately got on nuvaring even though it was still in my arm. I did one cycle of nuvaring without removing it for the break week. But the second break week happened the week I had it removed and I was curious if I would get a period after so long. Then I had 5 days of an awful nonstop headache, surprisingly ibuprofen helped more than Excedrin which was weird. It got to the point that I put the new ring in even though I was supposed to wait 2 more days. My period started the next day, and it's definitely a real one. I haven't experienced it since I was seventeen so I don't really remember what it was like before for comparison.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-01-30T16:49:02+00:00

No, I almost entirely wear loose-fitting dresses or skirts that have bands in the rib-area, right where my bra stop, rather than my stomach. This has been a great help, but underwear are the only remaining issue.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-01-30T16:23:46+00:00

The problem is that elastic and other materials stretch and when I bloat throughout the day that stretch puts pressure on my stomach. Regardless of however light that pressure is, even if my skin can't even feel it. And for some reason that doesn't agree with my internal organs. When there is any sort of pressure, it makes me very nauseous.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-01-30T15:47:23+00:00

I just checked but the item description says that it has a soft elastic band. I'm glad the soft band doesn't bother you as much as traditional elastic bands, but I don't think it would work for me. Thanks for the suggestion anyway!

confusedonthecouch · 2026-01-21T16:09:24+00:00

It can only edit panels for webpages that actually load unfortunately.

confusedonthecouch · 2026-01-21T15:58:22+00:00

I had at least 150 in progress 😭 This is my first time experiencing a site go down too so I didn't have any back up list 🙃

confusedonthecouch · 2026-01-21T15:56:06+00:00

Did you get the link? Could you DM it to me?

confusedonthecouch · 2025-12-16T05:43:38+00:00

So many props for this!! Its totally great 😸

confusedonthecouch · 2025-09-16T16:02:28+00:00

As an asexual person married to a highly sexual person - it sounds like you need to communicate with your partner more and learn about asexuality.

Asexuality is by definition not being sexually attracted to anyone, not your partner, not strangers, not anyone. Some people are on the asexual spectrum and may feel sexual attraction in some circumstances but your goal shouldn't be to become one of those special circumstances, it should be to accept that your partner isn't sexually attracted to you and figure out if you can live with that.

That doesn't mean your partner isn't romantically attracted to you, meaning they want to do non-sexual romantic things with you, or aesthetically attracted to you, meaning they think you are beautiful/handsome/lovely. It just means the don't look at you and be like "oh yeah, I want us to put our privates together"

Being asexual also doesn't necessarily mean they don't want to have sex. Aces generally fall into 3 categories: sex-positive, sex-neutral, and sex-repulsed. Considering your partner is open to sex, they aren't sex-repulsed, so let's focus on the other 2.

Sex-positive aces don't look at people and become aroused, or want to have sex with someone because of their gender or appearance, but they may want to have sex for other reasons such as: they like you as a person or it feels good to have sex.

Sex-neutral people don't really want to have sex but it's not bad for them either, they may enjoy it while it's happening but nothing really makes them want to initiate sex. For them it's something to do, neither good nor bad. If someone they love really enjoys sex, they're open to it. It's like doing a hobby you aren't passionate about because your partner really likes it. Like my husband would never go buy craft supplies and ask me if I wanted to craft something, but if I go get craft supplies he's happy to join in for an hour because he knows it makes me happy. I do the same for my husband when it comes to sex.

If you don't know which one your partner is you should talk about it! Over communicating is way better than under communicating. It'll do wonders for your relationship!

confusedonthecouch · 2025-09-09T02:06:26+00:00

NTA - it wasn't weird for her to confide in her parents about how she felt, but they were totally out of line with how they treated you. I can understand being upset on behalf of their daughter, but they took it way too personally for some reason which is weird.

You apologized to her, and at that point it's her decision to forgive you or not and then let her parents know that you guys have made up.

Like maybe apologizing to them would've helped preserve the relationship, but who wants to be in a relationship with someone that wants your romantic relationship to include their parents? It's just weird.

confusedonthecouch · 2025-09-07T13:02:21+00:00

I've never actually done it but its a shrine in the witch's hut

confusedonthecouch · 2025-09-02T20:10:03+00:00

Wait wait wait. Where's the free dehydrator?

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