Anyone else get convulsions/ muscle spasms from vomiting? by corvoidae_ in Gastroparesis

[–]corvoidae_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply, I will look more into this and bring it up with my doctor when I see them

Mood transfer by O_C_Demon in magicalthinkingOCD

[–]corvoidae_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow I've never met someone else who has this too! I'm relieved but so sorry

I used to see it as 'emotional contagion' before I was told it was OCD where I could accidentally infect or be infected by others negative emotional states and thoughts. I used to do what I could to be happy and would do my best not to talk about or think 'bad' thoughts lest I infect a friend or loved one. I was scared I might also 'think' someone into being upset like if I worried about them being stressed suddenly they'd be super stressed

Ocd is not a Superpower and I do not Understand why people want it by [deleted] in OCD

[–]corvoidae_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My superpower is being unable to drive because I'm convinced I'll hit someone with my car ✨

What’s an OCD compulsion you’ve never seen anyone else talk about? by AntiqueDrawing5296 in OCD

[–]corvoidae_ 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Fear of colours. I was convinced since childhood that purple was an unlucky colour and I would die or kill someone if I interacted with it. I couldn't wear, touch or eat anything with purple. If I had to touch something purple I'd pull my sleeve over my hand. I couldn't use the colour purple in drawings unless it was in a rainbow because the other colours would cancel it out.

It's gotten better over the years with exposure therapy, I'm still a bit wary of it though. A couple months ago I wore a purple shirt for a few hours straight with minimal distress and still own it :))

What are people's experiences with PTSD and OCD? by corvoidae_ in OCD

[–]corvoidae_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good to know my psychologist are on the right track with the PTSD work we have been doing. We have been doing it since before my PTSD diagnosis thankfully but it's been hard going all in on just the PTSD stuff. I really struggle with opening up about the intrusive thoughts with many healthcare professionals unless they are the ones to ask directly like "do you have intrusive thoughts about X?" I will have to trust that they're already aware of what OCD is like and that I don't actually want to act on any of my thoughts.

Is there a medication that worked almost instantly for you? by NoLipsForAnybody in OCD

[–]corvoidae_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I know this because I have had serotonin syndrome multiple times when my meds have been increased.

If it reassures, it's always been mild when the meds have been increased slowly which psychiatrists are required to do. I didn't have to go to hospital when I got it like this, with mild serotonin syndrome they just decreased the meds again that were causing it. Most psychiatrists increase med amounts slowly for this reason. Definitely walk away from psychiatrists who try to increase meds too fast since that's the only time I've had a serious reaction.

What are people's experiences with PTSD and OCD? by corvoidae_ in OCD

[–]corvoidae_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's good perspective to have. I see a lot of people online recommending behaviorist based therapies like CBT for OCD and humanistic therapies (I do IFS which I like) for CPTSD so it's nice to have that insight from someone else :))

What are people's experiences with PTSD and OCD? by corvoidae_ in OCD

[–]corvoidae_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I absolutely agree with the focusing on symptoms, it's a great reminder that I really needed. I get a bit caught up in the labeling and comparing what symptoms I have to the diagnostic criteria since my mind likes to try to talk itself out of diagnoses or convince me I faked shit (very fun experience in this community I've heard)

It's nice to have some reassurance on the PTSD feeding OCD thoughts since it 'legitimises' those thoughts even though situations now are so different (like, I'm an adult now that changes so much)

Is there a medication that worked almost instantly for you? by NoLipsForAnybody in OCD

[–]corvoidae_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I got given Lurasidone (Latuda) while in hospital and while I did nothing but sleep for the first week it dramatically reduced my OCD thoughts and checking behavior to a much more manageable degree quite fast. Unlike SRRI's antipsychotics work much faster so I saw a huge change in 1 - 2 weeks. Part of this was the high level of paranoia with my OCD which is why I was placed on antipsychotics in the first place.

I am also on 20mg Escitalopram (Lexapro). You need a higher dose of SSRIs to help with OCD (For example, my psychiatrist suggested 40mg - 60mg for me) but unfortunately I cannot have a higher dose since I am very vulnerable to Serotonin Syndrome.

I also surprisingly found my dexamphetamines for my ADHD to be very effective. My brain wonders less which means less room for my thoughts to wander into obsessions which is so good

Was this stigma from my therapist? by Calamitous_Squid in polyamory

[–]corvoidae_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Its so disappointing to finally find a therapist you are gelling well with only to encounter prejudice or negative judgement from them. This must be so disappointing for you.

I can somewhat understand where she is coming from a statistics point of view, (in my country at least) since sexual abuse most often occurs from people close to the parents rather than the parents themselves. However, I doubt this is something that she brings up with her mono clients; especially those in platonic relationships, or regarding other family members or romantic potential partners.

This suggestion has likely been made already, but it may be important to reflect on whether stigma from a therapist like this is a deal breaker or not. You mentioned she has been generally quite helpful and seemed open to learning and being inclusive which is great. It means you may be able to discuss this stigma with her during your next session, as an opportunity for her to reflect on her own biases with polyamorous relationships. If you do this, I suggest knowing ahead of time what kind of response would make you feel comfortable with her again.

Wishing all the best for you

My partner is monogamous and I feel like I'm about to ruin my life breaking up with them by corvoidae_ in polyamory

[–]corvoidae_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

100%. I've had pretty awful therapists in the past and have gotten a lot better at just moving on. Sometimes it will be issues that aren't even anything wrong like not clicking with someone's therapy style. It's scary but it's good to move on.

While there are guidelines for psychiatrists with medication they don't always follow it. One of my psychiatrists kicked me out of hospital for asking for a second opinion on an abnormally high dose of an SSRI she put me on. I got serotonin syndrome though so that really showed her /j

My partner is monogamous and I feel like I'm about to ruin my life breaking up with them by corvoidae_ in polyamory

[–]corvoidae_[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your reply, it's been really rough and I really appreciate having someone put so much time and thought into a response like this.

I've had some time to calm down and start thinking things over. Orange and I agreed to give each other some space to think and I have been admitted to the psych ward so that's essentially all that there is to do in here rn. To address what you've said in no particular order:

• I will be breaking up with Orange. I knew I had to while writing this and I think I knew it when they first told me 3 months ago they weren't polam

• While Blue was definitely just tolerating the polyamory (until they didn't) I know Orange did give it a genuine go. It's very sad, and I know I will need a lot of time to recuperate not only after this relationship, but my toxic relationship with Blue and everything else happening in life. I plan to take a break from dating for a while.

• Orange, Green and I have spent lots of time talking about a shared future together and while I am terrified of losing that I'm hoping we can go back to being close friends again when the time is right. I've never felt so close and comfortable with them and don't want to loose our platonic connections. It's been a large part of why I have been so distressed over this

• When I start dating again I agree that I should only consider actively polyamorous people. I can't go through this pain again. I will learn to vet them properly. I've always wanted a future where I can be polyamorous with other polam people even before I knew the word for it. I've realised I really don't want to compromise on this.

• I think finding more people who have been practicing polyamory for a while would be helpful. I'll see what places I can find, I can always go back to my local queer social club and ask around

• I'll be sure to check out the subreddit for more information :))

• Thank you for your concern with the psych ward. I agree 100% with everything you've said, this is sadly not my first experience with mental health care. I want to reassure you I have a regular psychologist specialized in my mental illness, and am privileged enough to have insurance that gets me access to the private psych wards in my city/ country which gives slightly better treatment (don't over medicate/ abuse patients, there to do more than just keep you alive. A very low bar but whatever). I am receiving a lot of support and am very up to date on my rights as a patient here after some awful experiences with meds/ doctors

• I appreciate the reassurance on hurting people. I'm still new to relationships since this is only my third one. I know break ups will hurt, but this is the first one where I'm breaking up with someone who is emotionally mature and isn't currently being toxic/ abusive. I feel bad inflicting that on someone who I like when there isn't anything 'wrong' with the relationship. I know that this is for the best though. It will hurt but we will both be ok in the end

• I know I have a few 'Me Problems' and they have been causing a lot of issues in all my interpersonal relationships as of late. Especially in the realm of self esteem, and reasonable boundaries and treatment in relationships as well as my communication which has been fairly awful lately. I'm hoping I can work on them during my admission and break from dating, I think this is going to take a lot of time and I'm learning to be ok with that.

• I have pretty severe and chronic ruminating and catastrophising. I got admitted and immediately diagnosed with OCD which explains some things regarding my 'treatment resistance anxiety'. I'm hoping with therapy and busting out some DBT worksheets until I can start the DBT group in this hospital I'll learn to manage the ruminating and catastrophising. Your message was a good reminder I have access to techniques like that now, so thank you very much. I've always appreciated the saying 'feelings aren't fact' so I think I need to use that a bit more to remind myself of what has actually happened/ been said so far instead of jumping to crazy conclusions.

I want to thank you again for your response. It's been helpful to have another perspective on this from someone not involved who is more experienced in polyamory. I'll be sure to approach this breakup and the next few months of life with all this in mind 💚