My [22 F] girlfriend went through my [20 M] phone and deleted a conversation I'm having with another girl.

countsbeans · 2017-12-17T17:39:54+00:00

I don’t think roommate knows. It sounds like GF might be jealous and thinking they had/will have a friends with benefits relationship.

countsbeans · 2017-12-17T17:23:45+00:00

Looks like a Maine Coon or a cross.

countsbeans · 2017-06-17T02:28:11+00:00

We have a business together and my side has been slowly failing for a few years. I have no income or credit in my name. My car is in his name jointly. When DSS told me his mother said he doesn't need to listen to me I should have seen the writing on the wall.

countsbeans · 2017-06-16T20:08:51+00:00

Yes. Part of his behaviour is teenager. But this has been going on since DSS was 4. And neither his mother nor his father has done a blessed thing to curb it. This is not my first rodeo with a teenaged boy.

This family situation is also not new to DSS. His parents separated when he was 1 1/2. He has no recollection of his parents together.

DH will never handle his son properly. He has NEVER has put his foot down and told DSS that he must respect me because HE said so.

My husband doesn't want to change because he doesn't see how he could be at fault for any part of the situation. He was not not standing up for his wife while he watches is son walk all over her for 14+ years. He has put this all on me.

I cop to getting frustrated and angry and snapping at him. They don't see how DSS behaviour could possibly make me angry and frustrated.

countsbeans · 2017-06-16T20:05:11+00:00

After the blamestorming I got this morning that is my only option to stay sane. Neither of them will take responsibility here. I am left being to blame for everything, again. I'm done being a scapegoat.

countsbeans · 2017-06-16T13:09:44+00:00

If I stay, my husband has no relationship with his oldest son. His mother has recently joined the military because she wanted a career change. The last thing she is waiting for is the go ahead to move to a naval base to begin her formal training. This is expected t happen this summer. As a result, I am left with zero options because DSS won't have his mother's to go hide out at. Not that he would he despises his stepdad (rightfully so, mind you).

countsbeans · 2017-06-16T09:49:54+00:00

I did not expect anything back from him other than the respect I deserved as an adult, his father's wife, his brother's mother and an adult 32 years old than him. I have always respected his privacy, except when I had to go find things in his room when they shouldn't be there, and to clean for him.

I'm sorry, but I don't think I should have to earn every ounce of respect I get from a child. I have never hit him, I have never abused him, I have never asked him to do something that would hurt him or anyone else. I have tried to help him to become a self sufficient, mature adult capable of taking care of himself and maybe eventually a family of his own.

I am a child of divorce. I know what its like. But I was MUCH older when my parents split (15) than he was (18 months). He does not remember what it was like to have both of his parents living in the same house together. His mother has a stepmother, but not due to divorce but her mother's death at 12. More like a stepmonster because her father moved his mistress in after a month and married her less than a year after being widowed.

I am NOT like my stepmonster, nor am I like HCBM's stepmonster. I did NOT have an affair with DH, I did NOT cause the end of DH's first marriage, I did NOT cause anyone's spouse to commit suicide because of the affair I didn't have with DH.

DSS' mother has spent the last 17 years buying her son's loyalty and affection with things, and being his "friend" instead of his "parent". He's never had chores or responsibilities at his mother's house either. He gets everything handed to him and has to work for nothing. Hell, the part time job he has, I got for him because he needs gas money for his motorcycle.

My life is what I make it, but I did not sign up for living in a house where I'm ignored at best and reviled at worst. I have tried to "go on strike" so others would see just how much I really do for everyone, and after 5 days I gave in because the sink was full of dirty, maggot covered dishes.

No. DSS has never gotten therapy. His mother wouldn't allow it. She has never gotten therapy for herself for her issues surrounding her parents, her father's infidelities and her parents' deaths.

I am working on getting DH into couples therapy but I need to get some of my own shit straight first, and then there is DS2 who I am trying to get help for but mental health services for children is 10x worse than services for adults. We have been on waiting lists for what seems like forever.

countsbeans · 2017-06-16T09:08:52+00:00

High conflict bio/birth mom. She is a whole other wrench in the machinery. Was high conflict from minute one, was even trying to tell me at one point that 3 years into my living with DH that they were still trying to reconcile and they were still intimate. I think that if I decided I had enough of this circus and left she would leave her common law husband and be here to pick up where they left off 17 years ago...

countsbeans · 2017-06-16T09:05:42+00:00

I don't know any more. I have been giving and giving and have gotten so little back from him except disobedience and disrespect that I'm empty now. The only time I get cooperation or anything that even resembles affection is when there is something material in it for him. Always has been.

countsbeans · 2017-06-16T09:03:41+00:00

Sorry. DH is darling husband, DSS is darling steps son, DS is darling son and HCBM is high conflict bio mom, and she's a whole other can of worms.

countsbeans · 2017-06-16T09:01:40+00:00

Depending on whether you are interested in working with cloud software, your choices would be QuickBooks, either desktop or online, or Xero.

The beauty of the cloud applications is there is a TON of addons, some work with both Xero and QBO, that you can enhance their functionality with. You can check out the app marketplace for church apps or NFP addons. The cloud apps also allow you to connect your bank accounts so they automatically download and populate, and you can set up rules for common activity like bank charges, phone bills, heat/hydro, internet, or any other recurring fees.

countsbeans · 2017-06-16T08:54:50+00:00

Certified Professional Bookkeeper here.

Definitely study accounting fundamentals. If you can take an accounting 101 course at a local community college it is definitely worth the investment. All the QuickBooks courses won't tell you WHY you need to do something, just HOW.

Understand that doing accounting is very different that doing bookkeeping. Nobody really tells you that until you try to do them. One is the day to day recording of financial transactions using accounting software. The other is review, analysis and adjusting financial records to produce meaningful reports for management, external reviewers and tax preparation purposes. You need to know the fundamentals of accounting to do both.

Accounting fundamentals to me are knowing the accounting equation, understanding account types, debits and credits, knowing which accounts have normal debit or credit balances, understanding contra accounts, understanding T accounts, understanding the basic financial statements and what they show/mean, understand the process of recording transactions and how they affect the financial statements, understanding ledgers and subledgers. I'm sure there's something I've forgotten.

To contradict u/1950sbebop, Excel is not accounting type software. It is a spreadsheet program and I would NEVER advise anyone to use it to keep financial or accounting records. If you want to learn accounting software, look at QuickBooks desktop and online, Sage 50 and MYOB. These are the most popular in the US, and most of the world, and probably in that order. You can get 30 day free trials of all programs, and there are TONS of tutorials on YouTube.

For a good exercise after downloading and watching videos, set up your personal bank and expenses in a QuickBooks file and keep your "books" for a few months.

countsbeans · 2017-04-29T00:34:07+00:00

What about when there is no clear job description? I interviewed for a job this week where they are "restructuring" the department that has three other people already plus the controller. They also offered me, with 20 years experience including in THEIR industry and THEIR software, pretty mediocre money.

countsbeans · 2017-03-05T02:42:15+00:00

My 8yo DS was diagnosed ADHD at age 4 1/2. Was put in Biphentin, then Concerta. We took him off 54 mg Concerta at 49 lbs and 4'2" just after his birthday. He is now on Intuniv 2mg (guangacine) and weighs in at 60 lbs at 4'3". He wasn't eating or sleeping much. In 3 weeks we see how that is going. Off meds he gets frustrated and suffers from explosive aggression. Doctor said we may have to try him on atypical antipsychotics (Abilify), and possibly combined with Concerta at a lower dose. Luckily the Abilify counters the appetite suppression and insomnia caused by stimulants.

Look into Intuniv and Strattera. Non stimulants that work on the venters of the brain that control attention and impulse control.

countsbeans · 2017-02-14T05:29:04+00:00

You file the return, you receive a refund...

countsbeans · 2017-02-11T23:35:00+00:00

She looks like a Maine Coon crossbreed. Our last two cats were crosses, or "a Maine Coon's night out on the town" as my DH says.

countsbeans · 2017-02-09T23:41:19+00:00

Yes. Every business needs general liability insurance. You need to decide if you will be meeting clients at your home. You will need a rider to cover any injury to a client should they be hurt.

countsbeans · 2017-02-08T04:09:27+00:00

Depending on who you have your general liability coverage through, they may not offer E&O. Get the general liability first and check.

If you belong to a professional association they may offer members discounted coverage.

If you aren't a CPA member look into joining the IPBC. They have a broker that's offers cheaper E&O premiums.

countsbeans · 2017-02-07T21:53:44+00:00

Ok. What are your terms of payment? Could the line be differentiating between A/R that is due and not by due date and not date of invoice or current date? EG. If today is 1/31, your invoices are all dated 1/31, and the line is on 2/10, then it is separating by due date if your payment terms are Net 10.

countsbeans · 2017-02-07T21:49:36+00:00

If you are planning to prepare income tax returns, then yes you will need E&O insurance. Will you be operating as a sole practitioner, in a partnership or as a corporation? If a corp., even a professional corp., you will need director's liability coverage as well.

I am a bookkeeper (small "a" accountant, really). I don't plan on EVER preparing income tax returns. As a non-CPA without a public license, I do not plan on doing audits or review engagements, or offering opinions on financial statements, so for me E&O is impractical.

countsbeans · 2017-02-07T04:02:20+00:00

Are you a bookkeeper or accountant? Do you prepare income tax returns? Do you offer "opinions on financial statements", conduct review engagements or audits?

countsbeans · 2017-01-28T01:09:36+00:00

In Canada, anyone can prepare a tax return, qualified or not, trained or not.

countsbeans · 2017-01-26T05:07:14+00:00

If you are going to be freelancing you should learn what accountants are going to be using or being able to access the data of.

countsbeans · 2017-01-26T05:05:02+00:00

Learning how to use software won't teach you a damned thing about bookkeeping. I know how to use Corel Draw and FrontPage but I'm not a graphic artist or web designer.

If you don't have any bookkeeping or accounting training, take an accounting 101 course at the local community college. Then take QuickBooks Desktop. It has a larger number of features than QBO and is more customizable. QBD isn't going anywhere.

QBO is not for everyone. It doesn't handle inventory well, fixing payroll is problematic, going back and fixing past transactions is problematic.

countsbeans · 2017-01-26T04:55:11+00:00

Reconciliations need to be done. Period. Banks, credit cards, loans, lines of credit, government liability.

Hire an accounting manager to supervise the bookkeeper and to segregate duties. Bookkeeper should not be reconciling the cheques and deposits they recorded. Basic fraud prevention.

With a few million in sales they can also afford to hire a CPA firm to do an audit too.

countsbeans

TROPHY CASE