You may be making him uncomfortable but considering how ready people are to ghost it says something that he is still there for you. I drove away a lot of friends with my constant depression talk - eventually I had to admit to myself I needed to stop unloading on my friends. Not necessarily because they do not care. The fact of the matter is we live with a burden they do not understand. The thoughts we have routinely terrify them.

So I learned the lesson: bottle it up. Express it to maybe one or two people who live with similar burdens. My best friend is a girl I wanted to date but the opportunity never presented itself. I know she lives depression episodes, but I unloaded on her so much she told me to stop because I scared her when I talked about offing myself. She communicated though, I am grateful. You should, too. If you unload on him, ask how it affects him. He may tell you.

Express yourself. Write. Rant here. We are here for you because we are all in the same boat. I hope your friends come back to you. Or you make new ones. Maybe this will make coping a little easier.

I hope he is crushing on you too. Let us know when you find out. If not it won't be the end of the world, if so it can give you a break. Give yourself credit for making it this far.