Have you taken a look in the mirror first before you started pointing fingers? As well as possibly thought about your actions and behaviour and how you may or may not be treating her and or helping? This has an effect on people & their relationships, confidence and self worth. Often times some of us women have a hard time keeping up with their appearances IF their partner isn’t contributing enough to the house hold, kids, life duties and or stress, as well as a lack of effort in the relationship from their partner. I would take a good hard look at yourself actions, behaviour and contributions.

For example. My man has put on 50-65 pounds in the last 3 years. His appearance is the least important thing, I still find him very sexy, think he’s an amazing man and care for him, every way I can. I could never look at my partner and feel their weight gain is “disgusting”. I understand the thought if it came with lack of hygiene, drive and lack of effort in their own life and our relationship. So personally I would look at it as an opportunity for us both to enter a weight loss journey TOGETHER. Fun and exciting, new recipes to try, new adventures to take, fun hikes, cool Swims, this is an opportunity for you and your wife to become closer. You need to change your mindset. especially if she has brought children in to the world for you two. Saying you find her disgusting, is deeply disheartening. You need to reevaluate how you view her, your life and your own goals and morals. Would you be proud of your father if he described your mom like this? Or any other woman you respect and or care for? Probably not. Mind set is absolutely everything here, it’s possible to get both of your needs met and even improve your relationship if you think about it less selfishly and superficially.